At the end of our first date the girl told me I was crazy in  
the head and I should be committed to a mental institution.  
Why do women always want us to make a commitment? --Unknown
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
After the accident, I told the police officer I thought the  
driver of the other vehicle was drunk. He told me the other  
vehicle was a cow.  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A couple was relating their vacation adventures to a friend.  
"It sounds as if you had a great time in Texas," the friend  
observed. "But didn't you tell me you were planning to visit  
Colorado?"  

"Well," the husband said, "we had a change of plans because,  
uh..."  

His wife cut in, "Oh, tell the truth, Fred!" He fell silent  
and she continued, "You know, it's just ridiculous. Fred  
simply will not ask for directions."  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Usually the secretary at my son's school answers when I call,  
but on this occasion I spoke to an unfamiliar voice. I men-  
tioned this to my 11-year-old son and asked if he knew who it  
was.  

"It could have been Mrs. Campbell," he answered after thinking  
it over. "Did it sound like she was wearing a blue coat?" 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Sources say the prenup Britney Spears made Kevin Federline  
sign is 60 pages long. The first page handles who gets the  
money and the next 59 pages handle who gets the trucker  
hats."  --Conan O'Brien  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Vice President Dick Cheney visited Saudi Arabia over the  
weekend, and he's very popular in Saudi Arabia, over there  
he's known as Lawrence of Arrhythmia." --David Letterman  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Here's an interesting statistic - according to "Cosmo",  
over 30 percent of men between the ages of 18 and 34 still  
live with their parents. These men are known as "Star Wars"  
fans." --Jay Leno  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A Cherokee Indian was a special guest at an elementary school.  
He talked to the children about his tribe and its traditions,  
then he shared with them this fun fact: "There are no swear  
words in the Cherokee language."  

One boy raised his hand, "But what if you're hammering a nail  
and accidentally smash your thumb?"  

"That," the man answered, "is when we use your language." 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A man received a phone call one day, and the caller asked if  
he had lost a parrot. He said that he had indeed lost the bird,  
but wanted to know how the caller located him.  

The called said that the bird had landed on his balcony and  
kept repeating, "Hi, you have reached 555-1234. I can't come  
to the phone right now, please leave a message at the tone."  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

**** HEALTH NEWS ****
 Scientists Spot Unknown Gene Interaction  

MILAN, Italy,-- Italian genetic researchers say they've made a  
discovery that might provide an important tool for controlling  
and treating breast cancer. Scientists at Milan's National  
Tumor Institute discovered proteins produced by the genes  
HER-2 and FHIT interact in a way that encourages tumor growth,  
the Italian news agency ANSA reported Wednesday. The  
researchers determined HER-2 prevents FHIT from blocking cell  
proliferation. Without FHIT's action, cells can multiply  
quickly and end up producing a tumor. "The analysis carried out  
for our research shows how the activity of HER-2 leads to the  
degradation of FHIT," Sylvie Menard, head of experimental  
oncology at INT, told ANSA. Medical researchers previously  
determined breast tumor development was often accompanied by  
an overproduction of proteins by the HER-2 gene. It is also  
known that in 70 percent of breast cancer cases, FHIT has  
stopped working for some reason. Menard told ANSA it should be  
possible to find pharmaceuticals to prevent FHIT degradation,  
thereby slowing the development of tumors. The research appears  
in the current issue of the journal of the American Academy  
of the Sciences.   

Spinal Cord Injury Pain Treatment Found  

SYDNEY, Australia --An Australian-led study has found the drug  
pregabalin effective for patients suffering moderate to severe  
pain from spinal cord injuries. "The findings are promising as  
spinal cord injury pain is a condition which generally responds  
poorly to currently available treatments," said study author  
Philip Siddall of the Royal North Shore Hospital in Sydney. The  
study, believed the largest involving spinal cord injury  
patients with nerve pain, involved 137 adults in Australia  
during a 12-week period. Half of the group received pregabalin;  
the other half received a placebo. Researchers found fewer than  
16 percent of patients taking pregabalin had severe pain  
compared with 43 percent in the placebo group. And more than  
one-third of patients in the pregabalin group had no or mild  
pain. "Pregabalin was significantly more effective in relieving  
pain, improving sleep, anxiety, and overall well-being in  
patients with spinal cord injury compared to placebo," said  
Siddall. Siddall said the pain relief was rapid with the pre-  
gabalin group reporting significant pain relief after the first  
week of the study. Pregabalin, manufactured by Pfizer Inc., is  
currently used to treat pain from diabetes and shingles. The  
study is reported in the journal Neurology.   

Ventricular Tachyarrhythmia Studied  

GOTTINGEN, Germany -- German scientists have found a possible  
molecular explanation for abnormally rapid heartbeats that  
can cause sudden death associated with heart failure. Lars  
Maier and colleagues at the Georg-August University in  
Gottingen, Germany -- using mice and heart muscle cells from  
rabbits -- found people inheriting mutations in genes regulat-  
ing the influx of sodium ions into their heart muscle cells are  
predisposed to life-threatening ventricular tachyarrhythmias,  
or VTs. Maier and colleagues investigated the effect of a  
protein known as calmodulin -- which regulates sodium ion  
channel function, expression and activity of the calmodulin  
effector, or CaMKII -- on sodium ion channel function. They  
found CaMKII overexpression in cultured heart muscle cells  
from rabbits, and as a transgene in mice, altered sodium ion  
channel function by binding sodium ion channel components and  
phosphorylating them. Mice overexpressing CaMKII were more  
susceptible to VTs than normal mice, leading the researchers  
to suggest CaMKII regulation of sodium ion channel function  
might be a contributing factor to the onset of the potentially  
life-threatening VTs associated with heart failure.   

*****Fred.....The Ole Fritbear!!!*****
Here we go again .... Just 20 More Days until that Jolly ole Elf in the Red Suit comes !!!  Hv yu all been good...??? - Cause HE KNOWS  whether you have been good or bad!!!!

You always find something in the last place you look.