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January22, 2007 - The Daily Funnies >> |
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From Carlisle
,Indiana
U.S.A.  Welcome to The Funnies "Friends
are God's way of taking care of
us."
These are clean jokes. However, They are, PG - Not intended for younger readers - PG An apology is the superglue of life. It can repair almost anything. Welcome New
Subscribers MONDAY JANUARY 22,2007 Growing old is like being
During an open-mike comedy show
featuring stand-up kid comedians, ten-year-old Sam said, "I asked my dad if he
thought electing a woman president of the United States would be a good
idea because it might make men more submissive to women. He answered, 'I don't
know. I'll have to ask your mother.'" "Hey, Mom," asked Johnny
"Can you give me twenty dollars?" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Billy Bob and Rufus worked together in a She asked Rufus his occupation and he said, “Diesel Fitter”, which was listed as a skilled job. She put him down for $ 600.00 a week. When Billy Bob found out, he was furious! He stormed back into the office to find out why his co-worker got twice the money. The clerk explained, “Panty Stitchers”, are unskilled, and “Diesel Fitters” are skilled labor. “What skill”? Yelled Billy Bob, I sew the elastic on the panties and Rufus puts ‘em over his head and says, “Diesel fitter’! norm **** Quickies **** Being in therapy is great. I spend an hour just talking about
myself. MOM'S MOTTO &&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&& SUBSCRIBE RessyPees-subscribe@yahoogroups.com &&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&  &&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&& You can join The Funnies IT'S FREE To subscribe, Click on link below 25438-subscribe@zinester.com &&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&
Greetings and amatory overtures from
your at grins and giggles. Grins, Giggles and Groaners
exists with one
belief,. . .to spread laughter and
joy to the world. We try to make a little difference in everyone's day by
bringing laughter and smiles to you and the people around you. Sent to you
"just for the fun of
it" .... because we firmly believe that everyone
needs a few smiles every now and then and hope you get a few chuckles or maybe a
hearty belly laff. • Feel free to pass 'em around!!!
---
≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥
A gushy reporter told Jack Nicklaus, "You are
spectacular, your name is synonymous with the game of golf. You really know your
way around the course. What's your secret?"
Nicklaus replied, "The holes are
numbered".
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An elderly gentleman had serious hearing
problems for a number of years. He went to the doctor and the doctor was able to
have him fitted for a set of hearing aids that allowed the gentleman to hear
100%.
The elderly gentleman went back in a month to
the doctor and the doctor said, "Your hearing is perfect. Your family must be
really pleased that you can hear again."
The gentleman replied, "Oh, I haven't told my
family yet. I just sit around and listen to the conversations. I've changed my
will three times!"
≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥
A crow was sitting on a tree, doing nothing all
day. A small rabbit saw the crow, and asked him, "Can I also sit like you and do
nothing all day long?".
The crow answered: Sure, why
not."
So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the crow
and rested. All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate
it.
Management Lesson?
To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be
sitting very, very high up.
≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥
A guy walks into a post office one day to see a
middle-aged, balding man standing at the counter methodically placing "Love"
stamps on bright pink envelopes with hearts all over them. He then takes out a
perfume bottle and starts spraying scent all over them. His curiosity getting
the better of him, he goes up to the balding man and asks him what he is doing.
The man says, "I'm sending out 1,000 Valentine's Day cards signed, 'Guess Who?'"
"But why?" asks the man. "I'm a divorce lawyer," the man replies.
≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥
There is the story of a pastor who got up one
Sunday and announced to his congregation, "I have good news and bad news. The
good news is, we have enough money to pay for our new building program. The bad
news is, it's still out there in your pockets."
≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥
Six-year-old Johnny is the most gullible little
boy in the world. One day, he is out shopping with his mother when he walks up
to a mannequin and starts to run his hand up the mannequin's skirt. Johnny's
mother sees this and rushes over, saying, "Johnny, don't you dare put your hand
under there! Women have teeth up there and you're lucky she didn't bite your
fingers off!" Johnny nodded dumbly and swore he would never touch a woman there.
Well 10 years later, 16-year-old Johnny is out on his first date with Cindy and
after dinner and a movie they find themselves in the back seat getting hot and
heavy. After awhile, Cindy finally says to Johnny, "Don't you want to take it
one step further? Don't you want to put your hands down my pants?" Johnny
immediately says, "Oh, no, you might bite my fingers off! I bet you have really
sharp teeth down there!" She starts to laugh and says, "No, I don't." "Yes, you
do!" he says. "No, I don't! Look, I'll prove it to you!" she says, and whips off
her jeans and panties, leans back, spreads her legs and says, "See, I told you
so!" He takes one look and exclaims, "Well, no wonder. Look at the condition of
your gums!"
≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥
Bert took his dog to the vet. "Doctor," he said
sadly, "I'm afraid I'm going to have to ask you to cut off my dog's tail." The
vet stepped back, "Bert, why should I do such a terrible thing?" Bert replied,
"Because my mother-in-law's arriving tomorrow, and I don't want anything to make
her think she's welcome."
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TWO true CLASSICS from the GGG
Archives!!!
A young couple got married and went on their
honeymoon. When they got back, the bride immediately called her mother. "Well,"
said her mother, "how was the honeymoon?" "Oh, mama," she replied, "the
honeymoon was wonderful! So romantic." Suddenly she burst out crying. "But,
mama, as soon as we returned, Sam started using the most horrible language.
Things I'd never heard before! I mean, all these awful four-letter words! You've
got to take me home. Please Mama!" "Sarah, Sarah," her mother said, "calm down!
You need to stay with your husband and work this out. Now, tell me, what could
be so awful? What four-letter words?" "Please don't make me tell you, Mama,"
wept the daughter. "I'm so embarrassed, they're just too awful. Come get me,
please." "Darling, baby, you must tell me what has you so upset. Tell your
mother these horrible four-letter words!" Sobbing, the bride said, "Oh, Mama, he
used words like dust, wash, iron, cook." "I'll pick you up in twenty minutes,"
said the mother.
≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥
Sitting behind a couple of nuns at a baseball
game, whose headgear partially blocked the view, three men decided to badger the
nuns in an effort to get them to move. In a very loud voice, the first guy said,
"I think I'm going to move to Utah, there are only 100 nuns living there." The
second guy spoke up and said, "I want to go to Montana, there are only 50 nuns
living there." The third guy said, "I want to go to Idaho, there are only 25
nuns living there." One of the nuns turned around, looked at the men, and in a
very sweet, calm, voice said, "Why don't you go to hell. There aren't any nuns
there."
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It's said that there are only two kinds of
people in the world. There are those who wake up in the morning and say, "Good
morning, Lord," and those who wake up in the morning and say, "Good Lord, it's
morning."
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WE just sent this out, but in case you missed
it, here it is again....PLEASE Send it out to someone special!!!
Off with the magnets. On with the bumper
stickers.
2007 Bumper
Stickers
1. That's OK, I Wasn't Using My Civil Liberties
Anyway
2. Let's Fix Democracy in this country
first!!
3. Bush. Like a Rock, only dumber!
4. Hey, Bush Supporters: Embarrassed
Yet?
5. Are We Kinder and Gentler Yet?
6. One Nation Under Clod
7. America: One Nation, Under
Surveillance
8. What Part of "Bush Lied" Don't You
Understand?
9. Whose God Do You Kill For?
10. Jail to the Chief
11. No, Seriously, Why Did We Invade
Iraq?
12. Bush: God's Way of Proving Intelligent
design is full of crap
13. We Need a President Who's Fluent In At least
one language!
14. We're Making Enemies Faster Than We Can Kill
Them!
15. Is It Vietnam Yet?
16. Don't Worry, Bush Doesn't Care About White
People Either!
17. You Elected Him. You Deserve
Him.
18. The Republican Party: Our Bridge to the 11th
Century.
19. They Call Him "W" So He Can Spell
It
20. Impeachment: It's Not Just for blow-jobs
anymore!
21. 2004: Embarrassed
2005:
Horrified
2006:
Terrified
22. At Least Nixon Resigned
23. George Bush: Creating the Terrorists our
Kids Will Have to Fight!
24. Where Are We Going? And Why Are We In
This Hand basket?
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A Few One Liners ///
The longest sentence known to man: "I
do."
Don't marry for money. It’s cheaper to
borrow.
Give in to temptation - It may not come your way
again!
Learn from your parents' mistakes; Use birth
control.
If I can be of any help . . . you're in worse
shape than I thought.
Earth is the insane asylum for the
universe.
Impotence: Nature's way of saying - "No
hard feelings"
Age is a very high price to pay for
maturity.
≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥
A woman walked into an accountant's office and
told him that she needed to file her income tax return. The accountant says,
"Before we begin, I'll need to ask you a few questions." He gets her name,
address and social security number, then asks, "What is your occupation?" "I'm a
whore," she says. The accountant is somewhat taken back and says, "No, no, no,
that won't work. That is too crass. Let's try to rephrase that." The woman says,
"OK, I'm a high-end call girl." "No, that's still too crude. Try again." They
both think for a minute, then the woman says, "I'm an elite chicken farmer." The
accountant asks, "What does chicken farming have to do with being a whore?"
"Well, I raised over a thousand little peckers last year." "Good enough," said
the accountant.
≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥
Q: If women with big boobs work at Hooters,
where do girls with one leg work?
A: IHOP. ≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥
A man walks into a bar with his dog and puts the
dog on a barstool. The bartender asks the man what he wants to drink. "I'll have
a bourbon and Coke!" The man then turns to his dog and asks, "What are you going
to have, Rover?" "I'll have a Scotch and soda, light on the soda," says Rover.
The bartender is skeptical about the dog talking. "Come on," he says, "That dog
can't talk. You're a ventriloquist!" "No, Rover can really talk. While I'm in
the restroom, you can have a conversation with him yourself, but don't let him
out of your sight. He is a very valuable dog." The man goes to the restroom.
When he returns, the dog is gone. "Hey, where's my dog? I told you not to let
him out of your sight. "Well, I didn't believe that Rover could talk, so I gave
him a quarter and sent him to the drug store to buy me a paper." "Let's go look
for him," said the man. The two went to the drugstore, but no Rover. They walked
up and down nearby alleys and streets, no dog. Finally, they found Rover in an
alley on top of another dog, pumping away. Pointing his finger at Rover, the man
says angrily, "Why are you doing this, Rover? You've never done this before!"
Rover replies, "First time I ever had any money!"
≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥
A woman and a baby were in the doctor's
examining room, waiting for
the doctor to come in for the baby's first exam. The doctor arrived, examined the baby, checked his weight, and being a little concerned, asked if the baby was breast-fed or bottle-fed. "Breast-fed," she replied. "Well, strip down to your waist," the doctor ordered. She did. He pinched her nipples, then pressed, kneaded, and rubbed both breasts for awhile in a detailed examination. Motioning to her to get dressed, he said, "No wonder this baby is underweight. You don't have any milk." "I know," she said, "I'm his grandma, but I'm glad I came." ≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥≤≥
WE have almost reached the end of another
edition of "GGG" for the 3rd Weekend of January 2007. We had a few
requests for a few totally useless facts . . . and here they are . We do
not vouch for their authenticity. but they can be used as conversation starters
.... to bone up for your next appearance on JEOPARDY or just to show off your
vast storehouse of useless knowledge. In any event, you just might learn
something New!
* The average American uses 743 tissues each
year.
* It takes 20 human searchers to do the work of just one rescue dog. * Twenty percent of men admit to viewing Internet porn at work. Just 13% of women admit to doing so. * It only takes seven pounds of pressure to rip off a human ear. * The Tokyo World Lanes Bowling Center, with 252 lanes, is the largest bowling establishment in the world. * A polar bear can eat 100 pounds of seal fat in one sitting. * In ancient Egypt, the apricot was called the "egg of the sun." * A newborn baby breathes five times faster than an adult man. * The Pink Floyd album, "Dark Side of the Moon," stayed on the top 200 Billboard charts for 741 weeks (or 14 years). * January is the deadliest month of the year in America, accounting for 9.4% of yearly deaths. * The largest snowflake ever found was 15 x 8 inches. It was found on January 28, 1887, in Fort Keogh, Montana. * The term "surfing the Internet" was created in 1992 by author Jean Armour Polly. She came up with the term because her mouse pad had a picture of a surfer on it. * Just six percent of people say they keep a daily diary. * January is National Soup Month. * About 1.4 billion spam e-mails are blocked by AOL each day. • Plymouth Rock weighs 10
tons.
• The ZIP in "ZIP code" stands for
"Zone Improvement Plan."
• Table salt is the only commodity
that hasn't risen dramatically in price in the last 150 years.
• The storage capacity of the human
brain exceeds four terabytes.
• In South Africa, termites are often
roasted and eaten by the handful, like popcorn.
• Tweety first said his line, "I
taught I taw a puddy tat!" in 1942's "A Tale of Two Kitties."
• A Welsh woman, Myra Franklin, sat
through 940 screenings of "The Sound of Music."
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**** ON
THIS DAY ****
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ -19- Leo Soileau, Cajun fiddler, born Ville Platte, LA 1904. Ken Nelson, Capitol Records producer, founding member of the Country Music Association (CMA) born Caledonia, MN 1911. CMHF 2001. Rollin "Oscar" Sullivan, of "Lonzo and Oscar," born Edmonton, KY 1919. Stu Phillips of the Grand Ole Opry, born Montreal, Quebec, Canada 1933. Phil Everly of The Everly Brothers, born Chicago, IL 1939. Dolly Parton, born Locast Ridge, TN 1946. NSHF 1986. CMHF 1999. Marty Robbins joined the Grand Ole Opry 1953. George Jones, age 22, recorded his first session for Starday Records 1954. Johnny Cash made his network TV debut on The Jackie Gleason Show on CBS 1957. Stephanie Davis singer/songwriter, born Bridger, MT 1958. Carl Perkins left Sun Records and signed with Columbia 1958. Carl became Columbia Record's first Rockabilly artist. Ralph Peer, age 67, recording pioneer, member CMHF, died in Hollywood 1960. Charlie Stripling, age 69, of the "Stripling Brothers" died 1966. Dennis Crouch of the Nashville Bluegrass Band, born Strawberry, AR 1967. John Conlee's single "Lady Lay Down," topped the charts 1979. Vic McAlpin, songwriter, died 1980. Steve Stebbins, age 80, retired LAPD officer turned talent booking agent, died 1983. Reba McEntire debuts in her first movie "Tremors" 1990. Carl Perkins, age 65, singer/songwriter/guitarist, died following a series of strokes 1998. Elected NSHF 1985, R&RHF 1987, RHOF. Darryl Worley's single "Awful Beautiful Life" topped the charts 2005. Sara Evans performed at the Black Tie & Boots Texas presidential inaugural event in Washington D.C. in 2005 Also appearing at the Black Tie & Boots event were Lyle Lovett, Asleep at the Wheel, Robert Earl Keen, Gary P. Nunn, Clay Walker and gospel singer Yolanda Adams. -20- Otis Dewey "Slim" Whitman, born Tampa, FL 1924. Elvis Presley was ordered to report for duty with the U. S. Army 1958. The Pentagon allowed him a sixty-day deferment so that he could finish the movie "King Creole." Patsy Cline released "She's Got You," on Decca 1962. John Michael Montgomery born Danville, KY 1965. Henson Cargill's #1 country hit "Skip A Rope" charted 1968. Flat & Scruggs played at Richard Nixon's inauguration 1969. Merle Haggard's "Carolyn" was No. 1 on the charts 1972. Jerry Lee Lewis debuted on the Grand Ole Opry 1973. Tanya Tucker's "Not Fade Away" hit the Pop charts 1979. Kenny Rogers' album "The Gambler" went to #1 in 1979. Mike Snider debuted on the Grand Ole Opry 1984. Clint Black's single "Nobody's Home" became his first #1 song 1990. The Americana Record Chart debuted in 1995, with less than fifty radio stations reporting. Checkered Past Records released Johnny Dowd's "Wrong Side of Memphis" 1998. Sara Evans single "Born To Fly" topped the charts 2001. Mark McGuinn debuted on the charts with "Mrs. Steven Rudy" 2001. Toby Keith's album "Unleashed" was certified 4 x platinum 2004. -21- Louis Innis, singer/songwriter, born Seymour, IN 1919. Mac Davis, singer/songwriter/actor, born Lubbock, TX 1942. Jim Ibbottson, "Nitty Gritty Dirt Band," born Philadelphia, PA 1947. Tennessee Ernie Ford's first session for Capitol Records 1949. Carl Perkins released "Blue Suede Shoes," 1956. Patsy Cline sang 'Walking After Midnight' on Arthur Godfrey's Talent Scouts 1957. Cedric Rainwater a. k. a "Howard Watts," bass player for Bill Monroe and Flat and Scruggs, died 1970. Eddie Rabbitt's single "I Love A Rainy Night" topped the charts 1981. Carl Perkins Inducted Rock & Roll Hall of Fame 1987. Sam Phillips presented. Jim Anglin, age 73, "Anglin Brothers" died 1987. Dwight Yoakam's "Guitars, Cadillacs, Etc." certified Gold 1987. Bashful Brother Oswald joined the Grand Ole Opry as a single act 1995. Colonel Tom Parker, age 87, Elvis Presley's 50% manager, died 1997. Ray Campi & Rosie Flores released their duet album "A Little Bit Of Heartache" 1997. Peggy Lee, age 81, died in Bel Air, CA from a heart attack 2002. Jasmine Records released Johnny Bond's "I Like My Chicken Fryin' Size" 2003. -22- Dickie McBride, recording artist/band leader, born New Baden, TX 1914. Bill Emerson, banjo, born Washington D.C. 1938. Bennie Fields "The Fields Brothers" born Kermit, WV 1941. J. P. Pennington, founder of "Exile" born Berea, KY 1949. Red Foley's single "Chattanoogie Shoe Shine Boy" topped the charts 1950. Teddy Gentry, vocals/bass for "Alabama," born Fort Payne, AL 1952. Little Jimmy Dickens recorded "Out Behind The Barn," for Columbia 1954. The Ozark Jubilee debuted on ABC television 1955. Porter Wagoner debuted on the Grand Ole Opry 1955. The Killer's "Great Balls of Fire" topped the charts 1958. Red Sovine's "Giddyup Go" was at the top of the charts in 1966. Glen Campbell's single "Wichita Lineman" became his first gold record 1969. Ezra "Eck" Carter, Maybelle's husband, and June Carter Cash's father died 1975. "Fifty Years of Country Music," a three-hour TV special was broadcast on NBC 1978. Hank Williams Jr.'s album "Strong Stuff" certified gold 1986. Paul Rice, age 68, of "The Rice Brothers" died 1988. Hal Ketchum joined the Grand Ole Opry 1994. Jimmy Day, age 65, died Houston, TX 1999. Jimmy was a member of the International Steel Guitar Hall of Fame, the Texas Steel Guitar Hall of Fame, and the Texas Western Swing Hall of Fame. Sara Evans welcomed daughter Olivia into the world. The child was born in Sara's hometown Franklin, MO 2003. The "2005 Grand Ole Opry Caribbean Cruise" set sail in 2005. Featured artists on this years cruise were; Trace Adkins, Bill Anderson, Terri Clark, and Hall of Fame member Little Jimmy Dickens.
Martina McBride announces new CD, tour for
April
Thursday, January 18, 2007 – Martina McBride will release a new album in April and start her tour that month as well, she announced Thursday. McBride will release her ninth album, "Waking Up Laughing," which she solo-produced, April 3. "Anyway", the debut single, currently sits in ninth after eight weeks on the country charts, making it her fastest-rising single ever and marks her first songwriting credit. She co-wrote two additional songs on the album as well. The tour starts in Kansas City on April 12 andd a show in Chicago April 14. Joining her for the tour will be 2006 breakout artists Little Big Town ("The Road to Here") and Rodney Atkins ("If You're Going Through Hell"). "As exciting as it is to create a new album, there's nothing quite as thrilling as getting the immediate feedback from a live crowd," said McBride. "I'm especially happy about being joined by Little Big Town and Rodney Atkins. We put a lot of thought into which artists to include on this tour, and I really feel like this show is going to be a treat for my fans from beginning to end. I can't wait to get out there on the road." Tour dates are: April 12 Kansas City Kemper Arena The following dates feature Martina McBride with Little Big Town (additional
artist to be announced) The Hag, Willie and Ray Price join
forces
Friday, January 19, 2007 – Merle Haggard, Willie Nelson and Ray Price are joining together to put out a new album, "Last of the New Breed," in March featuring classics and new songs. The trio's first album together will be released by Lost Highway and lead to a tour as well. "Last Of The Breed" is a 2-disc, 22-song collection of newly recorded versions of country classics. The disc was was recorded in Nashville and produced by Fred Foster, who also produced Nelson's 2006 Grammy nominated "You Don't Know Me: The Songs Of Cindy Walker." Backing musicians on the project included steel guitar legend Buddy Emmons, fiddler Johnny Gimble and backing vocalists The Jordanaires. Songs on the album include Harlan Howard's "Heartaches By The Number" (with Vince Gill on backing vocals), Cindy Walker's "Night Watch," Mickey Newbury's "Sweet Memories" and Kris Kristofferson's "Why Me Lord," featuring Kristofferson singing backing vocals. The Trio also cut a couple of recently penned songs with Nelson's "Back To Earth" and Haggard's "Sweet Jesus," co-written with Kenny Vernon. The Hag, Nelson and Price will head out on a tour in support of
"Last Of The Breed" with the acclaimed Asleep At The Wheel as their backing
band. The tour will include stops in New York, Nashville, Las Vegas, Detroit and
Colorado Springs. TAYLOR SWIFT'S SELF-TITLED DEBUT ALBUM TURNS TO
GOLD! HOMEMADE HOT
COCOA What happens to coins
when they reach the end of their lifespan?
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