There were three men at a bar.  One man got drunk and
started a fight with the other two men.  The police came
and took the drunk guy to jail.
The next day the man went before the judge.
The judge asked the man, "Where do you work?"
The man said, "Here and there."
The judge asked the man, "What do you do for a living?"
The man said, "This and that."
The judge then said, "Take him away."
The man said, "Wait, Judge, when will I get out?"
The judge said to the man, "Sooner or later...."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A fellow decided to decorate his bedroom. He wasn't sure how many
rolls of wallpaper he would need but he knew that the Irishman
who lived next door had recently done the same job and the two
rooms were identical in size.
"Murphy," he asked, "How many rolls of wallpaper did you buy for
your bedroom?"
"Ten" said Murphy.
So the fellow bought the ten rolls of paper and did the job. It
looked wonderful, but he had 2 rolls of wallpaper left over.
"Murphy," he said. "I bought ten rolls of wallpaper for the
bedroom, but I've got 2 left over!"
"Dat's funny," said Murphy. "So did I."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"I think everybody should get rich and famous and do every-  
thing they ever dreamed of so they can see that it's not  
the answer." --Jim Carrey  

[I'd love to be rich, but I wouldn't want to be famous.]  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Electricity can be dangerous. My nephew tried to stick a  
penny into a plug.  Whoever said a penny doesn't go far  
didn't see him shoot across that floor. I told him he was  
grounded." --Tim Allen   
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Correspondence schools are full of it. I saw an ad where  
they claimed they could teach you veterinarian medicine  
thought the mail. Hate to be a dog in that house. "Mail's  
here!" "Yip, yip, yip!" Talk about being a regular in the  
pet store, "Hey, didn't I already sell you a puppy?"  
 --Drew Carey 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
As the owner of an old clunker, I was used to dealing with  
a variety of car breakdowns. One day at the supermarket,  
just after I had filled my trunk with groceries, I noticed  
a stream of fluid pouring out of the bottom of the car. I  
knew I had to get home before the car was once again out of  
action.  

When I arrived I asked my husband to take a look at the pro-  
blem. Expecting the worst, I braced myself for his diagnosis.  
When he came back in, he was smiling. "It's apple juice," he  
said.  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A jeweler standing behind the counter of his shop after hours  
was astounded to see a suspicious looking man in a black ski  
mask come hurling headfirst through the window.  

"What on earth are you up to? What happened?!" he demanded.  

"I'm terribly sorry," said the man, "I forgot to let go of  
the brick."   
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
WHY I LOVE BLONDES
A phone company puts an ad in the paper that they are recruiting
workers.

The next day, two groups of workers show up. A crew of five Italian men
and a crew of five blonde women.

The company cannot decide whom to give the job to, so they give them a
test. The company boss says, "Each crew will receive a telephone pole
that they must install into the ground. Whoever is able to hammer it in
first, they will get the job."

Both groups agree that this is a fair test, so off they go in the
company trucks with the long telephone poles sticking out the back.

A few hours pass, and finally, at 5:00, the Italian crew returns.

"YAY!!" they shout. "We came back first, we get the job!!"

"Good work, men," says the boss, "However, we must wait until the other
crew comes back to make sure that the reason they're delayed is not
because of traffic, or that the truck broke down."

"Fine, no problem," say the men.

An hour passes, two hours pass, three hours. Finally, at 12:00, the
Blonde crew arrives. The entire group is flushed and breathing hard, as
if they had just gone through harsh labor.

"What happened to you? What took so long?" asks the boss incredulously.

"What do you mean, 'what took so long? Do we get the job?"

"YOU get the job? No way! The men were back here HOURS ago!"

"Well, of course they were," say the blondes. "They only put the pole in
halfway!!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Q.  How do you make a blonde laugh on Saturday?

A.  Tell her a joke on Wednesday.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
What do you call a brunette with a blonde on each side of her?
An interpreter.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
What do you call a brunette between two blondes?
A mental block.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Jill, a blonde, approaches the edge of a river. On the other side, she
sees another blonde. Jill asks her,

"Hey, how do I get to the other side of the river?"

The blonde responds....

        "You're on the other side."
        ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Q.  What's the advantage of being married to a blond?

A.  You can park in handicapped zones.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Q.  Why did the blonde only smell good on her right side?

A.  She didn't know where to buy Left Guard.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Q.  What does a post card from a blonde's vacation say?

A.  "Having a wonderful time!  Where am I?"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A defense attorney was cross-examining a police officer during a felony
trial - it went like this:

Q. Officer, did you see my client fleeing the scene?
A. No sir, but I subsequently observed a person matching the description
of the offender running several blocks away.

Q. Officer, who provided this description?
A. The officer who responded to the scene.

Q. A fellow officer provided the description of this so-called offender.
Do you trust your fellow officers? A. Yes sir, with my life.

Q. With your life? Let me ask you this then officer - do you have a
locker room in the police station - a room where you change your clothes
in preparation for your daily duties? A. Yes sir, we do.

Q. And do you have a locker in that room?
A. Yes sir, I do.

Q. And do you have a lock on your locker?
A. Yes sir.

Q. Now why is it, officer, if you trust your fellow officers with your
life, that you find it necessary to lock your locker in a room you share
with those same officers? A. You see sir, we share the building with a
court complex, and sometimes lawyers have been known to wander into that
room.

With that, the courtroom erupted in laughter, and a prompt recess was
called. The officer on the stand has since been nominated for the year's
"Best comeback" line and we think he'll win hands down!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Two men waiting at the Pearly Gates, strike up a conversation.

"How'd you die?" the first man asks the second guy.

"I froze to death," says the second guy.

"That's awful," says the first man. "How does it feel to freeze to
death?"

"It's very uncomfortable at first," says the second man. "You get the
shakes, and you get pains in all your fingers and toes. But eventually,
it's a very calm way to go. You get numb and you kind of drift off, as
if you're sleeping. How about you, how did you die?"

"I had a heart attack," says the first man, "You see, I knew my wife was
cheating on me, so one day I showed up at home unexpectedly. I ran up to
the bedroom and found her alone knitting. I ran down to the basement,
but no one was hiding there. I ran up to the second floor, but no one
was hiding there, either. Then I ran as fast as I could to the attic,
and just as I got there, I had a massive heart attack and died!"

The second man shakes his head,

"That's so ironic," he says.

"What do you mean ironic?" asks the first man.

"Well, if you had only stopped to look in the freezer, we'd  both still
be alive."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A man approaches the sales counter of an auto parts store.

"Excuse me," he says to the clerk. "I'd like to get a new gas cap for my
Yugo."

"Sure," the clerk replies. "Sounds like a fair exchange to me."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
 Teacher: Billy, do you think Noah did alot of fishing on the Ark?

Billie:  What? With ony two worms?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The entrance opens, two men dressed in Pilots' uniforms walk up the
aisle. Both are wearing dark glasses, one is using a guide dog, and the
other is tapping his way along the aisle with a cane. Nervous laughter
spreads through the cabin, but the men enter the cockpit, the door
closes, and the engines start up.  The passengers begin glancing
nervously around, searching for some sign that this is just a little
practical joke.  None is forthcoming.  The plane moves faster and faster
down the runway, and the people sitting in the window seats realize
they're headed straight for the water at the edge of the airport
territory. As it  begins to look as though the plane will plough into
the water, panicked screams fill the cabin. At that moment, the plane
lifts smoothly into the air. The passengers relax and laugh a little
sheepishly, and soon all retreat into their magazines, secure ! in the
knowledge that the plane is in good hands.

In the cockpit, one of the blind pilots turns to the other and says,
"You know, Bob, one of these days, they're gonna scream too late, and
we're all gonna die."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
When Joe's wife ran away, he got so depressed that his
doctor sent him to see a psychiatrist. Joe told the psychiatrist his
troubles and said, "Life isn't worth living." "Don't be stupid, Joe,"
said the psychiatrist. "Let work be your salvation. I want you to
totally submerge yourself in your work. Now, what do you do for a
living?"

"I clean out septic tanks," Joe replied.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A man was sitting at home one evening, when the doorbell rang.  When
  he answered the door, a 6 foot tall cockroach was standing there.
  The cockroach immediately punched him between the eyes and scampered
  off.

  The next evening, the man was sitting at home when the doorbell rang
  again.  When he answered the door, the cockroach was there again.
  This time, it punched him, kicked him and karate chopped him before
  running away.

  The third evening, the man was sitting at home when the doorbell
  rang.  When he answered the door, the cockroach was there yet again.
  It leapt at him and stabbed him several times before running off.
  The gravely injured man managed to crawl to the telephone and
  summoned an ambulance.

  He was rushed to intensive care, where they saved his life.

  The next morning, the doctor was doing his rounds.  He asked the man
  what happened, so the man explained about the 6 foot cockroach's
  attacks, culminating in the near fatal stabbing.

  The doctor thought for a moment and said, "Yes, there's a nasty bug
  going around."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Q.  What's the difference between a lawyer and a snake?

A.  When you run over a snake, you don't back up to make sure it's dead.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Q.  How do you save a drowning lawyer?

A.  Take your foot off his head.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Q.  If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why shouldn't you swerve and hit
him?

A.  It might be your bicycle.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Q.  What's the difference between a vampire and a lawyer?

A.  A vampire sucks bloods only at night.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
An engineer, a physicist, and a lawyer were being interviewed for a
position as chief executive officer (CEO) of a large corporation. The
engineer was interviewed first and was asked a long list of questions,
endiing with. . .

"How much is two plus two?"

The engineer excused himself and made a series of measurements and
calculations before returning to the board room and announcing. . .

"Four!"

The physicist was interviewed next and was asked the same questions.
Again, the last question was. . .

"How much is two plus two?"

Before answering the last question, he excused himself, made for the
library, and did a great deal of research. After consulting with the
United States Bureau of Standards and making many calculations, he also
announced. . .

"Four!"

The lawyer was interviewed last, and again.... the final question was. .
.

"How much is two plus two?"

The lawyer draws all the shades in the room, looks outside to see if
anyone is there, checks the telephone for listening devices, and finally
whispers. . .

        "How much do you want it to be?"
        ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
At Sunday School they were teaching how God created everything,
including human beings. Little Johnny, a child in the kindergarten
class, seemed especially intent when they told him how Eve was created
out of one of Adam's ribs.  Later in the week his mother noticed him
lying down as though he were ill, and said, "Johnny what is the matter?"
Little Johnny responded, "I have a pain in my side. I think I'm going to
have a wife."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Little Johnny's kindergarten class was on a field trip to their local
police station where they saw pictures tacked to a bulletin board of the
10 most wanted criminals. One of the youngsters pointed to a picture and
asked if it really was the photo of a wanted person. "Yes," said the
policeman. "The detectives want very badly to capture him." Little
Johnny asked, "Why didn't you keep him when you took his picture?"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The math teacher saw that little Johnny wasn't paying attention in class
She called on him and said, "Johnny! What are 2 and 4 and 28 and 44?"
Little Johnny quickly replied, "NBC, CBS, HBO and the Cartoon Network!"

A new teacher was trying to make use of her psychology courses. She
started her class by saying, "Everyone who thinks you're stupid, stand
up!" After a few seconds, Little Johnny stood up. The teacher said, "Do
you think you're stupid, Little Johnny?" "No, ma'am, but I hate to see
you standing there all by yourself!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
At his request, each morning three-year-old Ray's mother pinned a bath
towel to the back shoulders of his size two T- shirt. Immediately in his
young imaginative mind the towel became a brilliant magic blue and red
cape.

And he became Superman. Outfitted each day in his "cape," Ray's days
were packed with adventure and daring escapades. He was Superman.

This fact was clearly pointed out last fall when his mother enrolled him
in kindergarten class. During the course of the interview, the teacher
asked Ray his name.

"Superman," he answered politely and without pause.

The teacher smiled, cast an appreciative glance at his mother, and asked
again, "Your real name, please."

Again, Ray answered, "Superman."

Realizing the situation demanded more authority, or maybe to hide
amusement, the teacher closed her eyes for a moment, then in a voice
quite stern, said, "I will have to have your real name for the records."

Sensing he'd have to play straight with the teacher, Ray slid his eyes
around the room, hunched closer to her, and patting a corner of frayed
towel at his shoulder, answered in a voice hushed with conspiracy,
"Clark Kent." 

When you receive this, please stop
for a moment and Say a prayer for our
servicemen. There is nothing attached....
Just send this to all the people in your
address book. Do not stop the wheel,
please.... Of all the gifts you could give
a US Soldier, or anyone, Prayer is the
very best one.

**** Reader's Submissions ****

Helping your child handle a bully
If your child is being bullied, get involved. Children nee to know you’re taking the situation seriously and will act to help stop the bullying.
Follow this advice.
· Listen in a loving manner. Don’t let your child see that you’re upset. This can make the situation worse.
· Tell your child that he or she isn’t to blame.
· Support your child’s feelings. Instead of saying, “Everything will be fine,” say, “I understand you’re having a tough time. Let’s work together to deal with this.”
· Talk to your child’s teacher and principal, and brainstorm solutions.

If another child physically assaults your child or is seriously threatening your child with physical injury take action immediately. Talk with school officials to help determine whether the police need to be involved.

What kids can do.
· Don’t react to the bullying. Bullies may give up if they don’t get the attention they crave.
· Don’t hit, kick or push back.
· Practice what you’ll say to a bully, such as, “I want you to stop now.”
· Show confidence by walking away with your head held high.
· Stick with a friend while on the bus, at lunch or in between classes.
· Talk to an adult. Parents, teachers, principals and guidance counselors can help you stop the bullying.

- Mayo Clinic -

**** ON THIS DAY ****

 **** COUNTRY MUSIC NEWS ****
  

Tim McGraw and Faith Hill's LA mansion burglarized, police say


LOS ANGELES (AP) -- The Hollywood Hills mansion of Tim McGraw and Faith Hill was burglarized over the weekend, police said Tuesday.

The home was broken into between Friday and Monday when no one was home, said police Sgt. Lee Sands. A person arriving at the house Monday morning discovered the crime and called police, he said.

Police would only say an unspecified amount of money was taken and they had no immediate suspects.

The house is not the couple's principal home, said Paul Freundlich, Hill's publicist. The singers, who live in Nashville, Tenn., were not in Los Angeles for Sunday night's Grammy Awards, he said.

McGraw and Hill, both 39, are among the biggest stars in country music, separately and as a duo. Between them, they have won numerous honors including Grammys, American Music Awards, Country Music Association Awards and Academy of Country Music Awards.

Sammy Kershaw Files for Bankruptcy  

Sammy Kershaw, who hit No. 1 in 1993 with "She Don't Know  
She's Beautiful," has filed for bankruptcy in U.S.  
Bankruptcy Court in Nashville. The singer listed liabil-  
ities between $100,001 and $1 million in the Chapter 13  
filing submitted to the court on Tuesday (Feb. 6). He  
also lists his assets in the same range. Chapter 13  
bankruptcy is available to individuals who promise to  
use available income to repay as many creditors as  
possible. His income was not listed in the legal docu-  
ments. Kershaw, who married singer Lorrie Morgan in 2001,  
enjoyed a string of No. 1 singles in the '90s, including  
"Cadillac Style" and "National Working Woman's Holiday."  
Kershaw's last charted single, "Tennessee Girl," peaked  
at No. 43 in 2006.   
 
Despite Grammys, Dixie Chicks still on outs with country radio


NASHVILLE, Tenn. Country radio still isn't ready to make nice with the Dixie Chicks.

With a haul of Grammys yesterday, the Texas trio topped their comeback from their 2003 Bush-bashing comment that turned them from superstars to pariahs.

Jim Jacobs, owner of W-T-D-R F-M, a country radio station in Talladega, Alabama, said most country stations aren't playing the Chicks, and they aren't going to start now.

The awards might spark another radio backlash against the Texas group. Country broadcasters told The Associated Press today that the group's five Grammys show how out of touch the Recording Academy is from the average country fan.

Many country stations quit playing the Chicks in 2003 after singer Natalie Maines told a London audience the group was ashamed that President Bush is from Texas.

Almost overnight, Maines became a lightning rod in the debate over the Iraq war, with conservatives blasting her for criticizing the president, especially while on foreign soil.

Country brass miffed as Carrie, Rascal Flatts don't sing their hits

By BEVERLY KEEL


LOS ANGELES — Although there was joy at Sunday's Sony/BMG post-Grammy party at the famed Beverly Hills Hotel, most of the Nashville contingent was still very upset that Carrie Underwood and Rascal Flatts were not allowed to sing their songs on the Grammys.

"I think we ought to boycott the Grammys," says CAA's John Huie, half-kidding (or was he?). Manager Ken Levitan is also dismayed at the slight, and you know Sony/BMG chief Joe Galante is still miffed at the missed opportunity for the world to hear Carrie's music.

But American Idol creator Simon Fuller said, "Carrie's winning is the perfect answer." (By the way, here's a special Tuesday good morning to Simon, who reads this column online in California.) It will be interesting to see if the Nashville labels unite to fight for their genre at the Grammys, instead of just lobbying for their individual artists.

But enough serious talk. Let's get to the party.

Sony/BMG's event was the party of the night, attracting the Grammy's big winners, Carrie and the Dixie Chicks, and guests such as Beyonce, John Legend, Dave Grohl, Smokey Robinson, Wyclef Jean, Tara Reid and, yes, even Paris Hilton, all of whom mingled with us mere mortals.

Carrie arrived with her cute English date, Oliver Trevena, and stayed with her Nashville friends the whole time. Clive Davis came over to pay his respects, as did many others. She was nice to everyone who approached her.

When it comes to her growing fame, she is the most unaffected celebrity I have seen. She is appreciative of her success but unimpressed by the trappings that surround it.

And then you had John Mayer and Jessica Simpson, who huddled in one of the outside cabanas blocked to the rest of the partygoers by a velvet rope. John was in fine spirits, dancing and singing Michael Jackson's "PYT" while talking to a few people. Jessica's father, Joe, stood watch nearby. When the Dixie Chicks arrived, they were hustled to another cabana, which appeared to be watched by two guards. Maybe they're not ready to make nice with everybody.

Dixie Chicks fuel family feud

At Clive Davis' party, I asked Larry King if he thought the anger toward the Dixie Chicks would fade in time. Before he could even finish his thoughts, I got my answer.

"I like them a lot," he says. "I've had them on. They are a terrific act."

But his wife, country singer Shawn Southwick-King, began voicing her disapproval of the Texas trio before he stopped speaking. "She's a Republican," Larry says, before telling her, "They have every right to express themselves. Last time I checked, this was America. I give them a lot of credit for standing up for what they believe and you don't have to buy their records and you don't have to go to their concerts. Boycott is as American as apple pie."

It continued on a bit, and then Shawn says, "You should have a respect for the office of the president. It's not just Republicans. It's people who are Americans who may have" — then Larry interrupts, "What did they say that" — but she finishes — "no matter what — he is our president."

He says, "I know him very well." She says, "I know him very well, too. And to stand up and make a public" — Larry interrupts, "You would ban it?"

She starts to argue, but then gives up. "We're just going to go round and round," she says. "But there are two definitive ways to think about this. And that is why our household is never dull."

But the Chicks have the full support of singer/activist Joan Baez, who introduced them at the Grammys. "It was a massive education for them and I am just very proud of how they stood up to it because (the reaction) was a shock," she says. "To me, the response to things I did, I knew what was coming. They showed tremendous bravery. In this particular political atmosphere, it could happen to anybody, just like it happened to them."


**** Amy's Kitchen ****  

CANDY BAR FUDGE BITES  

1 (6-ounce) package semi-sweet chocolate chips  
1 can store-bought chocolate fudge frosting  
1 cup butterscotch chips  
2 1/2 large candy bars, any flavor and cut up  
 (I like Snickers but use your favorite)  

DIRECTIONS:  
Line 8-inch square pan with foil, extending over edges;  
lightly butter foil and set aside. In large microwave-  
safe bowl, combine both flavored chips; microwave on  
medium for 1 to 2 minutes or until chips are melted.  
Stir until smooth. Stir in frosting and pieces from about  
2 candy bars until mixed. Spread in foil-lined pan;  
sprinkle with rest of candy bar. Refrigerate 1 hour or  
until firm. Remove fudge by lifting foil from fudge.  
Cut into bite-sized squares.  

TO MELT CHOCOLATE  USE THE MICROWAVE  
For dipping your own homemade treats  

Chocolate that is overheated may scorch, lose flavor and  
turn coarse and grainy. Here's a good tip for melting  
chocolate in your microwave:  

Place coarsely chopped chocolate in a microwave-safe  
container and microwave at MEDIUM (50 percent power) for  
1 1/2 to 4 minutes, until the chocolate turns shiny.  
Between each minute remove chocolate from the microwave  
and stir. repeat until completely melted. Because of their  
milk proteins, they need to be stirred sooner than dark  
chocolate. (If overheated, these chocolates may become  
grainy.)  

**** TODAY'S USELESS FACT ****

What is "Stockholm Syndrome"?

  Stockholm Syndrome describes the behavior of kidnap victims who, over time, become sympathetic to their captors. The name derives from a 1973 hostage incident in Stockholm, Sweden. At the end of six days of captivity in a bank, several kidnap victims actually resisted rescue attempts, and afterwards refused to testify against their captors.

The most famous incident in the U.S. involved the kidnapped heiress Patty Hearst. Captured by a radical political group known as the Symbionese Liberation Army in 1974, Ms. Hearst eventually became an accomplice of the group, taking on an assumed name and assisting them in several bank robberies. After her re-capture, she denounced the group and her involvement.

What causes Stockholm Syndrome? Captives begin to identify with their captors initially as a defensive mechanism, out of fear of violence. Small acts of kindness by the captor are magnified, since finding perspective in a hostage situation is by definition impossible. Rescue attempts are also seen as a threat, since it's likely the captive would be injured during such attempts.

It's important to note that these symptoms occur under tremendous emotional and often physical duress. The behavior is considered a common survival strategy for victims of interpersonal abuse, and has been observed in battered spouses, abused children, prisoners of war, and concentration camp survivors.

LADIES,HAPPY VALENTINES DAY..........JIM



****A PARTING THOUGHT ****
The older we get, the fewer things seem
worth waiting in line for

LAST CALL Y'ALL


HEY, DON'T BE A STRANGER NOW,YA HEAR!
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+
Hey, Let's be careful out there
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+
PLEASE
Don't take anything you see in the Funnies personally. 
The contents are meant to be jokes, nothing more.
Everyone & everything is an equal opportunity target here.
EVERYONE IS FAIR GAME  
The Funnies are strictly an opt-in service.
We do not sell, lease, loan, or give our subscribers'
addresses to anyone for any reason.
Our features are intended to be for entertainment only.