From Carlisle ,Indiana
U.S.A.

Welcome to The Funnies

"Friends are God's way of taking care of us."
These are clean jokes. However,
They are,
PG - Not intended for younger readers - PG
An apology is the superglue of life. It can repair almost anything.

Welcome New Subscribers
If you don't have a sense of humor, you probably
don't have any sense at all
Anyone without a sense of humor is at the mercy
of the rest of us. Heaven Help Them
Remember,it is easier to get older
than it is to get wiser

Test copy

THOUGHT FOR TODAY: If a man has enough "horse sense" to treat his wife like a thoroughbred, she will never be an old nag.....Hmmm

On a Sunday morning, our country church received a call telling us that the cows belonging to Matt, a vacationing parishioner, were out of their pasture. A group of volunteers was formed, and they went off to retrieve the cows and close the fence gate. They returned just as the service ended. The next week at church, Matt thanked everyone for their care and help. But he was, he said, surprised to find 20 extra cows in his pasture.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Realizing that I'd put on a pound or two, I lamented to my husband, "I'm
fat." And right on cue he said what all good husbands must: "You're not
fat." To support his position, he added, "Just look around you at
others, and you will see that you are not fat." But our daughter, a high
schooler, saw through it: "Mom, he's grading you on the curve!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
There has never yet been a fisherman who could keep both hands
in his pockets while describing the one that got away.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The two ladies were sitting in the living room, waiting for their
hostess, who was slightly delayed. The daughter of the family was with
them, on the theory that she would keep the visitors occupied during the
wait.

The child was about six years old, snub nosed, freckled, buck toothed
and bespectacled. She maintained a deep silence and the two ladies
peered doubtfully at her. Finally, one of them muttered to the other,

"Not very p-r-e-t-t-y, I fear," carefully spelling the 'key' word.

Whereupon the child piped ups,

"But awful s-m-a-r-t."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Life is like a doughnut: you're either in the dough or in the hole.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Exercise of the brain is as important as exercise of the muscles. As we
grow older, it's important that we keep mentally alert. The saying: "If
you don't use it, you will lose it" also applies to the brain.

Below is a very private way to gage your loss or non-loss of
intelligence. So take the following test presented here and determine if
you are losing it or are still a MENSA candidate. OK, relax, clear your
mind and . . . begin.

1. What do you put in a toaster?

The answer is bread. If you said "toast", then give up now and go do
something else. Try not to hurt yourself. If you said, "bread", go to
question 2.

2. Say "silk" five times. Now spell "silk". What do cows drink?

Answer: Cows drink water. If you said "milk", please do not attempt the
next question. Your brain is obviously overstressed and may even
overheat. It may be that you need to content yourself with reading
something more appropriate such as "Children's World! ". If you said,
"water" then proceed to question three.

3. If a red house is made from red bricks and a blue house is made from
blue bricks and a pink house is made from pink bricks and a black house
is made from black bricks, what is a greenhouse made from?

Answer: Greenhouses are made from glass. If you said "green bricks",
what the heck are you still doing here reading these questions? If you
said "glass", then go on to question four.

4. Twenty years ago, a plane is flying at 20,000 feet over Germany. If
you will recall, Germany at the time was politically divided into West
Germany and East Germany. Anyway, during the flight, TWO of the engines
fail. The pilot, realizing that the last remaining engine is also
failing, decides on a crash landing procedure. Unfortunately the engine
fails before he has time and the plane crashes smack in the middle of
"no man's land" between East Germany and West Germany. Where would you
bury the survivors - East Germany ! or West Germany or in "no man's
land"?

Answer: You don't, of course, bury survivors. If you said ANYTHING else,
you are a real dunce and you must NEVER try to rescue anyone from a
plane crash. Your efforts would not be appreciated. If you said, "Don't
bury the survivors" then proceed to the next question.

5. If the hour hand on a clock moves 1/60th of a degree every minute
then how many degrees will the hour hand move in one hour?

Answer: One degree. If you said "360 degrees" or anything other than
"one degree", you are to be congratulated on getting this far, but you
are obviously out of your league. Turn your pencil in and exit the room.
Everyone else proceed to the final question.

6. Without using a calculator - You are driving a bus from London to
Milford Haven in Wales. In London, 17 people get on the bus. In Reading,
six people get off the bus and nine people get on. In Swindon, two
people get off and four get on. In Cardiff, 11 people get off and 16
people get on. In Swansea, three people get off and five people get on.
In Carmathen, six people get off and three get on. You then arrive at
Milford Haven. What was the name of the bus driver?

Answer: Oh, for heaven sake! It was YOU, Read the first line!!!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
At a special dinner to celebrate a team accomplishment, we were each served our plates of elegant cuisine. A few of us had ordered ostrich and were being harassed for our selection. "You know about beef, and you know about chicken, but what do you know about ostrich?" asked one of our colleagues. "We know that ostriches are fast," I said, exhausting my knowledge of the bird. Picking up a morsel of his ostrich meat, my husband added, "Not fast enough."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Middle age is when you are warned to slow down by a doctor instead of a policeman
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
If men got pregnant, maternity leave would last a year with full pay,
there would be a cure for stretch marks, and morning sickness
would be the nation's number-one health problem.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Acquiring a large vocabulary is easy," said a high school instructor.
"By using a word ten times, you can make it your very own for life,"
In the back of the room a young girl quietly intoned, "Marvin, Marvin,
Marvin, Marvin, Marvin, Marvin, Marvin, Marvin, Marvin, Marvin."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
~Q: Why can you only have two doors on a chicken coup?

A: If it had four it would be a chicken sedan.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Two little ol' ladies were attending a rather long Sunday
church service. One lady leaned over and whispered, "My butt has gone to sleep."

Her friend said, "I know. I've heard it snore at least 3 times!!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Halfway through the baseball season, one of the youngsters I coach still hadn't been on base. But in one game he finally managed to reach first base. Two batters later he was standing on third. I thought it would be a good time to review some theory. I leaned over and asked him to tell me which base he was on. He looked intently across at first base, turned to observe second and then stared down at his feet. He looked up at me triumphantly and announced, "This one!"

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&
Shirley's ressypees e-zine
We do take requests!! If you are looking for any particular
recipe,
send your request to: mailto:bigguyhereagain@cogeco.ca

SUBSCRIBE RessyPees-subscribe@yahoogroups.com

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&
You can join The Funnies
IT'S FREE
To subscribe, Click on link below
25438-subscribe@zinester.com
&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

**** HEALTH NEWS ****

FDA OKs drug to treat rare blood disorder

WASHINGTON, -- The U.S. Food and Drug Administration has
approved Soliris (eculizumab), the first drug produced for
the treatment of a rare blood disorder. The disorder,
paroxysmal nocturnal hemoglobinuria, or PNH, can lead to
disability and premature death. Soliris is classified as an
orphan drug -- a pharmaceutical developed to treat fewer
than 200,000 people. Orphan status gives the drug's
manufacturer a seven-year period in which to exclusively
market the compound. Soliris, is manufactured by Alexion
Pharmaceuticals Inc. of Cheshire, Conn. "This product is
important in that it offers a treatment other than blood
transfusion that may help this small population of patients
who are often very ill," said Dr. Steven Galson, director of
the FDA's Center for Drug Evaluation and Research. PNH,
which usually develops in adults, is a disease characterized
by red blood cells that develop abnormally Depending upon
the severity of the disorder, patients with PNH may
experience pain, fatigue, debilitating weakness, blood
clots, and life-threatening or fatal strokes, heart attacks
and intestinal disease. They often need frequent blood
transfusions. Soliris does not cure PNH, but treats the
breakdown of red blood cells.

      Probiotic bacteria cuts salmonella in pigs

CORK, Ireland, -- Irish scientists have found
treatment with probiotic bacteria can reduce Salmonella
infections in pigs and might have potential human appli-
cations. Salmonella is one of the major causes of food-borne
gastroenteritis worldwide. Probiotics are live micro-
organisms believed to promote a health benefit in the host
when administered in controlled amounts. In the study, led
by Pat Casey of University College in Cork, Ireland, the
researchers divided pigs into two groups, one of which
received milk containing five lactic acid bacteria probiotic
strains and the other, serving as a control group, received
regular milk for 30 days. Following 6 days of treatment the
pigs were exposed orally with Salmonella bacteria and their
health was then monitored for 23 days. The researchers
reported pigs receiving probiotic treatment showed reduced
incidence, severity, and duration of diarrhea, as well as
significantly lower numbers of Salmonella in fecal samples
15 days post-infection. "The administered probiotic bacteria
improved both the clinical and microbiological outcome of
Salmonella infection," said the researchers. "These strains
offer significant benefit for use in the food industry and
may have potential in human applications." The research is
detailed in the March issue of the journal Applied and
Environmental Microbiology.

    Compound may fight Kennedy's disease

ROCHESTER, N.Y., March 21 (UPI) -- U.S. cancer scientists
have discovered a compound that shows promise against a
debilitating neurodegenerative condition known as Kennedy's
disease. There is currently no treatment for the inherited
disorder that is caused by a mutant gene and which resembles
a slowly progressive form of Lou Gehrig's disease. It
affects only men. The compound discovered at the University
of Rochester Medical Center is a distant chemical relative
of a component of the spice curry. Researchers said it
dramatically slowed the progression of the disease in mice,
allowing them to walk much more normally, maintain stronger
muscles and near-normal levels of a molecule crucial for
keeping nerve cells healthy. While more research is needed
to determine whether the compound could be developed into a
drug to help people with the disease, scientists say it's a
promising development in a field where progress has been
slow. Chawnshang Chang and colleagues report their research
in the March 6 issue of the journal Nature Medicine.

**** Reader's Submissions ****

A butcher watching over his shop is really surprised when he saw a
dog coming inside the shop. He shoos him away. But later, the dog is
back again.

So, he goes over to the dog and notices he has a note in his mouth.
He takes the note and it reads "Can I have 12 sausages and a leg of
lamb, please. The dog has money in his mouth, as well."

The butcher looks inside and, lo and behold, there is a ten dollar
Note there. So he takes the money and puts the sausages and lamb in
a bag, placing it in the dog's mouth. The butcher is so impressed,
and since it's about closing time, he decides to shut up shop and
follow the dog.

So off he goes. The dog is walking down the street when he comes To
a level crossing.

The dog puts down the bag, jumps up and presses the button. Then he
waits patiently, bag in mouth, for the lights to turn. They do, and
he walks across the road, with the butcher following him all the
way.

The dog then comes to a bus stop, and starts looking at the
timetable.

The butcher is in awe at this stage. The dog checks out the times,
and then sits on one of the seats provided. Along comes a bus. The
dog walks around to the front, looks at the number, and goes back to
his seat.

Another bus comes. Again the dog goes and looks at the number,
notices it's the right bus, and climbs on. The butcher, by now, open-
mouthed, follows him onto the bus.

The bus travels through the town and out into the suburbs, the dog
Looking at the scenery. Eventually he gets up, and moves to the
front of the bus. He stands on 2 back paws and pushes the button to
stop the bus. Then he gets off, his groceries still in his mouth.

Well, dog and butcher are walking along the road, and then the dog
turns into a house. He walks up the path, and drops the groceries on
the step.

Then he walks back down the path, takes a big run, and throws
himself against the door. He goes back down the path, runs up to the
door and again, it throws himself against it. There's no answer at
the house, so the dog goes back down the path, jumps up on a narrow
wall, and walks along the perimeter of the garden. He gets to the
window, and beats his head against it several times, walks back,
jumps off, and waits at the door.

The butcher watches as a big guy opens the door, and starts abusing
the dog, kicking him and punching him, and swearing at him.

The butcher runs up, and stops the guy. "What in heaven's name are
You doing? The dog is a genius. He could be on TV, for the life of
me!" to which the guy responds: "You call this clever? This is the
second time this week that this stupid dog's forgotten his key."

Reflection:
Looks like some, people will never be satisfied with what they've
got.

When it comes to the work place, Employers do not know how to
appreciate their people who have served them loyally through the
years. I've seen companies lose good people for the simple fact
their leaders failed to show appreciation. Employers with big egos
enjoy the fact that they have more power and authority than others.
They show, in the way they give orders and directions, that they
think they are superior. They get a kick out of displaying this
superiority. People who do this are fools, and everyone but them
knows it. They are never satisfied because they could not be
satisfied even if their people perform well.

They don't listen to the opinion and ideas of their subordinates.

Why? Because of their stupid pride and insecurity.

People of this kind will never be satisfied. Why? Because they are
so busy wrapped up in themselves and, fact is, the self can never be
satisfied. Happy and productive people are always those who
are "others-centered" rather than "self- centered." The greatest
idea of leadership is not someone who throws his weight around.
Rather, he is a servant. As Bible would say, "He who wish to be a
leader should first be a servant."

His joy is derived from delivering a job that others benefit from
his contribution. Aim for service and success will follow.
~&~

This is one of the best explanations of why God allows pain and suffering that I have seen. It's an explanation many people will understand

A man went to a barbershop to have his hair cut and his beard trimmed. As the barber began to work, they began to have a good conversation. They talked about so many things and various subjects.

When they eventually touched on the subject of God, the barber said: "I don't believe that God exists." "Why do you say that?" asked the customer. "Well, you just have to go out in the street to realize that God doesn't exist. Tell me, if God exists, would there be so many sick people? Would there be abandoned children? If God existed, there would be neither suffering nor pain. I can't imagine a loving God who would allow all of these things."

The customer thought for a moment, but didn't respond because he didn't want to start an argument. The barber finished his job and the customer left the shop. Just after he left the barbershop, he saw a man in the street with long, stringy, dirty hair and an untrimmed beard. He looked dirty and unkempt.

The customer turned back and entered the barber shop again and he said to the barber: "You know what? Barbers do not exist." "How can you say that?" asked the surprised barber. "I am here, and I am a barber. And I just worked on you!" "No!" the customer exclaimed. "Barbers don't exist because if they did, there would be no people with dirty long hair and untrimmed beards, like that man outside."

"Ah, but barbers DO exist! What happens is, people do not come to me."

"Exactly!"- affirmed the customer. "That's the point! God, too, DOES exist! What happens, is, people don't go to Him and do not look for Him. That's why there's so much pain and suffering in the world."

If you think God exists, send this to other people

If you think God does not exist, delete it!
BE BLESSED & BE A BLESSING !

**** ON THIS DAY ****

**** HEADS UP FOLKS ****
These Are My Causes Please Help

This is a link for FREE virus protection
http://avast.com
It is excellent. I use it myself
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Organ and Tissue Donation/Transplanation
http://www.organdonor.gov/

It takes less than a minute to go to their site and click on "donating a mammogram"
for free (pink window in the middle). This doesn't cost you a thing. Their corporate
sponsors/advertisers use the number of daily visits to donate mammogram
in exchange for advertising.

Here's the web site! Pass it along to people you know.
http://www.thebreastcancersite.com
&
The Animal Rescue Site is having trouble getting enough people to click on it daily to meet their quota
of getting free food donated every day to abused and neglected animals. It takes less than a minute to go
to their site and click on "feed an animal in need" for free! This doesn't cost you a thing! Their corporate
sponsors/advertisers use the number of daily visits to donate food to abandoned/neglected animals in exchange
for advertising.
Here's the web site! Pass it along to people you know!
http://www.theanimalrescuesite.com

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
This is a link for FREE virus protection
http://avast.com
It is excellent
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Thoughts or Comments
jokes or stories
U Send'em and I'll print'em
Just keep it clean.A lota kids read this
jim4615@earthlink.net
Subject Line--- The Funnies
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

**** COUNTRY CALENDAR ****

-22-

Charlie Poole born Randolph County, NC 1892.

Cecil Campbell, steel guitarist, born Danbury NC 1911.

Hoyle Nix, Western Swing fiddler/bandleader born Azel, TX 1918.

Johnny Ferguson born Nashville, TN 1937.

Jimmie Davis topped the charts with "There's A New Moon Over My Shoulder" 1945.

Uncle Dave Macon died in Murfreesboro, TN 1952. Inducted CMHF 1966.

Gene Libbea, "Nashville Bluegrass Band," born Pasadena, CA 1953.

Jerry Lee Lewis and Myra, his 13-year-old cousin, were married 1958.

Johnny Cash recorded "Hey Porter" at Sun Records in Memphis, 1955.

Jerry Lee Lewis and Myra, his 13-year-old cousin, were married 1958.

Hank Williams Jr., age 8, made his stage debut in Swainsboro, GA 1958.

Sonny James' single "Only The Lonely" went to No. 1 in 1969.

Waylon recorded "Are You Ready For The Country," 1976.

Stoney Cooper, age 59, of Wilma Lee & Stoney Cooper died 1977.

Glen Campbell's "Southern Nights" topped the charts 1977.

Exile's single "Crazy For Your Love" was the No. 1 song in 1985.

K. T. Oslin's album "80's Ladies" certified gold 1988.

The Country Music Hall of Fame opened their "Johnny Cash" exhibit 1988.

Kenny Chesney's "Big Star" debuted on Billboard's Top 40 in 2003.

Danny Bailey, age 84, of the Bailey Brothers, died Knoxville, TN 2004.

The Library of Congress announced it has added three more country music recordings to its "Registry of Historic Sound" 2004. Bob Wills' "New San Antonio Rose," Patsy Cline's "Crazy," and "Johnny Cash at Folsom Prison."

-23-

Fiddlin' John Carson, vocals, fiddler, 20's recording artist, born Fannin County, GA 1868.

Jim Anglin, writer of "Ashes Of Love" and "One By One," born Franklin, TN 1913.

Homer "Pappy" Sherrill born Sherrill's Ford, NC 1915.

Eugene "Smokey" Rogers, singer/songwriter/banjoist born McMinnville, TN 1917.

Ray and Carrie Cash, moved their family to Dyess, AR 1935.

David Grisman, Bluegrass/mandolinist/composer born Hackensack, NJ 1945.

Al Dexter's "Guitar Polka" topped the charts in 1946.

Hank and Audrey Williams recorded "The Pale Horse And His Rider," 1951.

Webb Pierce sat atop the country charts with "Slowly," 1954.

Wilma Lee & Stoney Cooper, perform for the last time as members of the WWVA Wheeling Jamboree, 1957.

Jimmy Skinner signed with Starday Records, 1963.

Merle Haggard recorded "Jesus, Take A Hold" 1969.

Ken Maynard, Singing Cowboy actor, age 77, died in California 1973.

Waylon & Willie's "Mamas Don't Let Your Babies Grow Up To Be Cowboys," topped the charts in 1978

Willie Nelson and Ray Charles' "Seven Spanish Angels" hit #1 in 1985.

Emmylou Harris' "Quarter Moon In A Ten Cent Town," certified gold 1988.

J. D. Miller, age 73, Record Label owner/songwriter, died in Lafayette, LA 1996.

Barbara Mandrell gave a farewell concert at the Grand Ole Opry House 1997. She then retired from the music industry, and moved to California to purse a career in acting.

The Ryman Auditorium hosted a memorial service for Waylon Jennings in 2002. Travis Tritt and Billy Ray Cyrus embraced on stage, ending a long running feud.

Roy "Pop" Lewis, age 98, of The Lewis Family, died 2004.

-24-

Peggy Sue born Paintsville, KY 1947.

Merle Travis topped the charts with "So Round, So Firm, So Fully Packed" 1947.

Marty Robbins released "Love Me Or Leave Me Alone/Tomorrow You'll Be Gone." 1952.

Wanda Jackson recorded "I'm Gonna Walk Out Of Your Life" 1954.

Webb Pierce's "In The Jailhouse Now" was No. 1 in 1955.

Wanda Jackson recorded "Don't Touch Me" 1955.

Carson J. Robison, age 66, singer/songwriter died 1957. Elected NSHF 1971.

Elvis Presley sworn into the U.S. Army in 1958.

Howard Dixon, age 57, "Dixon Brothers," died 1961.

Willie Narmour, age 71, fiddler/recording artist, died 1961.

Bill Anderson's classic "Still" topped the charts 1963.

Roy Orbison's Greatest Hits album certified gold 1966.

Tanya Tuckers first No. 1 single, "What's Your Mama's Name," charted 1973.

Waylon recorded "Jack-A-Diamonds," 1976.

Anne Murray's single "I Just Fall In Love Again" went to No. 1 in 1979.

Toby Keith and wife Trica were married in 1984.

Sony released "Always You Pal, Gene Autry" 1998.

Joe Talbot, age 72, country music executive, died in his Nashville home in 2000.

Toby Keith's father, age 67, was killed in a hit & run auto accident in 2001. The incident occurred on I 35 outside Norman, OK. The female driver of the hit & run vehicle was located and arrested.

**** COUNTRY MUSIC NEWS ****

Reba McEntire hosts ACMs

Wednesday, March 21, 2007 � Reba McEntire will return as host of the 42nd annual Academy of Country Music Awards when the show is held May 15 in Las Vegas.

"I am so flattered to be asked to host the Academy of Country Music Awards," said McEntire. "I'm thrilled to be heading back to Las Vegas to help put on the greatest show in country music."

This year's telecast will mark the ninth time McEntire has hosted the event. She has won 11 Academy of Country Music Awards and has 41 nominations total. In 2001 she was awarded the first annual Academy of Country Music/The Home Depot Humanitarian Award for her outstanding philanthropic work. In 2003, the Academy of Country Music awarded her the title of "Leading Lady" in recognition of her status as the all-time leading winner in the Top Female Vocalist category with seven wins.

The Academy is comprised of more than 4,500 professional members and more than 40,000 associate members. Dick Clark Productions owns the event.

Alison Krauss launches summer tour

Wednesday, March 21, 2007 � Alison Krauss will launch a summer tour in mid-June following on the heels of an album out in April.

The tour is slated to start in Jackson, Miss. June 14 and conclude July 29 in Dayton, Ohio.

Krauss and her Union Station backing band will perform in more than 30 cities throughout the U.S. "An Evening with Alison Krauss and Union Station Featuring Jerry Douglas," will make stops in Kansas City, Los Angeles, Minneapolis and St. Louis and consist songs from "A Hundred Miles or More: A Collection" and older material. The new disc is out on Rounder April 3.

Other cities on the tour include Jackson, Miss., Birmingham, Ala., Southaven, Miss., Branson, Kansas City, Mo., Oklahoma City, Phoenix, San Diego, Spokane, Wash., Rapid City, S.D., Cedar Rapids, Ia., Indianapolis, Lexington, Ky. and Peoria, Ill.

Krauss is on tour in April and May with Tony Rice, performing together.

TANYA TUCKER EXCLUSIVE INTERVIEW FOR �BRITNEY SPEARS: TOXIC EXPOSURE� TO AIR THIS SATURDAY ON FOX NEWS

For immediate release

Media Contacts:
Webster & Associates Public Relations 615-777-6995
Kirt Webster � kirt@websterpr.com
Brandon Fox � brandon@websterpr.com

TANYA TUCKER EXCLUSIVE INTERVIEW FOR �BRITNEY SPEARS: TOXIC EXPOSURE� TO AIR THIS SATURDAY ON FOX NEWS

Tanya Tucker is featured this weekend on THE BIOGRAPHY CHANNEL

(Nashville, TN) � With all the controversy surrounding Britney Spears� breakdown and recovery, attention has been drawn to country music�s leading lady Tanya Tucker regarding the similarities in her life and career. Similarities so much, that even Britney�s father has reached out to Tanya. On Saturday, March 24th, FOX News will feature Tanya in a primetime special titled �Britney Spears: Toxic Exposure.�

The television special will parallel Britney and Tanya�s life, from their early childhood success in music and television to their fascinating personal lives. The story will include both icon�s descent into drugs and alcohol and their attempts at recovery. Also appearing in the television special is Britney�s mother, Lynn Spears, and other former child stars including Debbie Gibson, Christopher Knight, and Danny Bonaduce.

�Britney Spears: Toxic Exposure� will air Saturday, March 24th at 9pm (ET) and again on Sunday, March 25th at 4pm (ET).

Also this Saturday, Tanya�s life story will be featured on the BIOGRAPHY CHANNEL at 10:00am (ET). The episode will highlight Tanya�s life story starting with her early childhood success and the chaos that ensued. In the 1990�s Tanya had a resurgence in country music and was able to pursue other professional endeavors outside of music. Her ventures included several book deals and a television series, focusing solely on her rowdy life, appropriately titled �Tuckerville.�

Tanya has recorded over 30 albums and scored over 29 top ten singles, deeming her as one of the top female performers of all time. As she enters into her second season of �Tuckerville� on this fall, Tanya proves that she remains one of pop culture�s most fascinating women.

**** Amy's Kitchen ****
Baked Flounder Filets

2 tablespoons butter, melted
1 teaspoon salt
4 fillets of flounder or delicate white fish (about 2 pounds)
2 cups sour cream

Place butter in bottom of shallow baking dish. Arrange fillets in bottom of
baking dish. Salt generously and spread sour cream over entire surface.
Bake at 375 degrees for 15 minutes or until fish can be flaked with a fork.

Serve directly from dish, as fish will break up on removal.

**** TODAY'S USELESS FACT ****

What's the difference between true north and magnetic north?

True north is a constant and refers to the geographic North Pole. Magnetic north tends to shift and refers to the pole of the Earth's magnetic field. In mid 2004, true north and magnetic north were approximately 600 miles apart.
The poles of the Earth's magnetic field are different from its geographic poles. Maps are aligned along true north, so hikers have to make adjustments when navigating by compass.

In navigation, the difference between true north and magnetic north is known as declination. All U.S. Geological Survey maps print relevant declination information, and the maps are updated every five years to account for shift. Hikers traveling in Northern California, for instance, have to make declination adjustments of roughly 18 degrees.

The Earth's magnetic field stems from its molten metallic core, much of which is iron. Iron is a fairly common element, since it can't be burned off during the fiery formation of stars. Iron is magnetic because its inner electron shells are slightly unstable.

****A PARTING THOUGHT ****
Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach that person to
use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks.

LAST CALL Y'ALL

HEY, DON'T BE A STRANGER NOW,YA HEAR!
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+
Hey, Let's be careful out there
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+
PLEASE
Don't take anything you see in the Funnies personally.
The contents are meant to be jokes, nothing more.
Everyone & everything is an equal opportunity target here.
EVERYONE IS FAIR GAME
The Funnies are strictly an opt-in service.
We do not sell, lease, loan, or give our subscribers'
addresses to anyone for any reason.
Our features are intended to be for entertainment only.

Disclaimer :All of my materials are Borrowed from various areas on the web

and from my readers. All are believed to be public domain . If you hold
copyright on any of these materials please inform me so I may give the
proper credit, or remove it which ever you prefer.
~
GOD BLESS AMERICA
~
To subscribe, Click on a link below
25438-subscribe@zinester.com
~
To unsubscribe from this opt-in mailing list
click on link at the end of this mailing
~
Regarding any problems In accordance with the 2004
Can-Spam act you can contact me with question or
comments at: JIM4615@JOINK.COM
or
Jim Dowers
P.O. Box 521
Carlisle, IN 47838-0521
&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&
Miss getting The Funnies,or is your ISP
blocking mail again?
No problem
To Read the Funnies on line. Just click on this link
Archives Index: http://archives.zinester.com/25438
&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

Unsubscribe link is at the END of this list

God Bless America , Our Land , Forever May She Stand
&&&&&&&&&&
THIS DOCUMENT IS VIRUS FREE

Scanned by Avast virus protection
~
Unsubscription Email: 25438-unsubscribe@zinester.com
Unsubscription URL: http://www.zinester.com/mpb/unsub.cgi?25438