|
The Funnies Archives Index
|
Subscribe
|
|
| << August08, 2007 - The Daily Funnies |
August10, 2007 - The Daily Funnies >> |
 From Carlisle ,Indiana
U.S.A.   Welcome to The Funnies est.7-4-2000 "Friends are God's way of
taking care of us."
These are clean jokes. However, They are, PG - Not intended for younger readers - PG An apology is the superglue of life. It can repair almost anything. Welcome New Subscribers God, grant me the Senility
to forget the people  THURSDAY AUGUST 9,2007 (For
everyone who has ever had an evaluation, just remember ... it could have
been worse!)
These are actual quotes taken from Federal Government employee performance evaluations. 1. "Since my last report, this employee has reached rock bottom and has started to dig." 2. "I would not allow this employee to breed." 3. "This employee is really not so much of a 'has-been', but more of a definite 'won't be'." 4. "Works well when under constant supervision and cornered like a rat in a trap." 5. "When he opens his mouth, it seems that it is only to change feet." 6. "This young lady had delusions of adequacy." 7. "He sets low personal standards and then consistently fails to achieve them." 8. "This employee is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot." 9. "This employee should go far, and the sooner he starts, the better." 10. "Got a full six pack, but lacks the plastic thingy to hold it all together." 11. "A gross ignoramus ... 144 times worse than an ordinary ignoramus." 12. "He doesn't have ulcers, but he's a distributor." 13. "I would like to go hunting with him sometime." 14. "He's been working with glue too much." 15. "He would argue with a signpost." 16. "He brings a lot of joy whenever he leaves the room." 17. "When his IQ reaches 50, he should sell." 18. "If you see two people talking and one looks bored, he's the other one." 19. "A photographic memory but with the lens cover glued on." 20. "A prime candidate for natural de-selection." 21. "Donated his brain to science before he was done using it." 22. "Gates are down, the lights are flashing, but the train isn't coming." 23. "He's got two brain cells, one is lost and the other is out looking for it." 24. "If he were any more stupid, he'd have to be watered twice a week." 25. "If you give him a penny for his thoughts, you'd get change." 26. "If you stand close enough to him, you can hear the ocean." 27. "It's hard to believe he beat out 1,000,000 other sperm." 28. "One neuron short of a synapse." 29. "Some drink from the fountain of knowledge; he only gargled." 30. "Takes him two hours to watch '60 Minutes.'" 31. "The wheel is turning, but the hamster is dead." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Because I couldn't unplug the toilet with a plunger, I had to dismantle the entire fixture no small feat for a non-plumber. Jammed inside the drain was a purple rubber dinosaur which belonged to my five-year-old son. I painstakingly got all the toilet parts together again, the tank filled, and I flushed it. However, it didn't work much better than before. As I pondered what to do next, David walked into the bathroom. I pointed to the purple dinosaur I had just dislodged and told him that the toilet still wasn't working. "Did you get the green one?" he asked. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ You don't have to own a cat to appreciate this one... A couple was dressed and ready to go out for the evening. They turned on a night light, turned the answering machine on the phone line, covered their pet parakeet and put the cat in the backyard. They phoned the local cab company and requested a taxi. The taxi arrived and the couple opened the front door to leave their house. The cat they had put out into the yard scoots back into the house. They don't want the cat shut in the house because she always tries to eat the bird. The wife goes out to the taxi while the husband goes inside to get the cat. The cat runs upstairs, the man in hot pursuit. Waiting in the cab, the wife doesn't want the driver to know the house will be empty for the night. She explains to the taxi driver that her husband will be out soon. "He's just going upstairs to say good-bye to my mother." A few minutes later, the husband gets into the cab. "Sorry I took so long," he says, as they drive away. "Stupid heifer was hiding under the bed. Had to poke her with a coat hanger to get her to come out! She tried to take off so I grabbed her by the neck. Then I had to wrap her in a blanket to keep her from scratching me. But it worked. I hauled her fat butt downstairs and threw her out into the back yard!" The cabdriver hit a parked car........ ~~~~~~~~~~~NORM~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ One morning the phone rang at 3:00 a.m. in a blonde's house. She picked up the phone and a man asked, "Is this 555-1111?" "No, this is 555-1112." She replied. "Oh, I'm so sorry for disturbing you." The man said. "That's alright," said, "I had to get up to answer the phone anyway." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ A farmer was driving along the road with a load of fertilizer. Little Christopher, playing in front of his house, saw him and called out. . . "What've you got in your truck?" "Fertilizer," the farmer replied. "What are you going to do with it?" asked Chris "Put it on strawberries," answered the farmer. "You ought to live here," Chris advised him. . . "We put sugar and cream on ours." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ A lawyer was on his deathbed in his bedroom, and he called to his wife. She rushed in and said, "What is it, honey?" He told her to run and get the bible as soon as possible. Being a religious woman, she thought this was a good idea. She ran and got it, prepared to read him his favorite verse or something of the sort. He snatched it from her and began quickly scanning pages, his eyes darting right and left. The wife was curious. "What are you doing, honey?" she asked. "I'm looking for loopholes!" he shouted. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ I'd always been apprehensive about joining a chat room for fear I'd do something wrong. One day after my son, Sean, had gotten off the computer, I logged on to the Internet to play a game. Suddenly a screen popped up saying, "Your friend is online." Apparently Sean had forgotten to sign off, and I took the opportunity to chat with someone I probably knew. Sean's friend assumed he was still chatting with Sean, and I was having fun with the situation. After a few minutes, however, Sean's friend typed: "Who is this?" "Why do you ask that?" I responded. The reply came across the screen: "Because Sean doesn't spell that good." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ In search of a new shower for our home, my wife and I went to a bathroom-supply store. We discussed our needs with a young saleswoman. Since it was near closing time, we had to curtail our discussion and made plans to come back the next day to make our final decision. Later that evening, my wife and I were at a restaurant, where the same young lady from the bathroom-supply store was now working a shift as a waitress. As she passed our table, she suddenly recognized us and called to me in a loud voice, "HEY! You're the man who needs a shower!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ It was John's turn to drive carpool into town on a day when a new member was travelling along for the first time. As they rode along he began to be suspicious of his new carpooling passenger. John checked to see if his wallet was safe in the pocket of his coat that was on the seat between him and the new passenger, but.... it wasn't there! Next, he slammed on the brakes, ordered the fellow out, and said, "Hand over the wallet immediately!" The frightened carpooler handed over a billfold, and John droveoff, leaving him alone at the side of the road. When he arrived home that evening, he started to tell his wife about the experience, but she interrupted him, saying, "Before I forget, John, do you know that you left your wallet at home this morning?" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHURCH BULLETIN BLOOPER: "The monthly seniors' lunch will take place on Wednesday. It will be gin with Mass at 11:30 a.m. followed by luncheon and cards." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Little Johnny called up his parents from his college and asked for some money, because he ran out. His mother said, "Sure, sweetie. I'll send you some money. You also left your calculus book here when you visited 2 weeks ago. Do you want me to send that up too?" "Uhh, oh yeah, OK," responded Little Johnny. So his mother wrapped the book along with two checks up in a package, kissed her husband goodbye, and went to the post office to mail the money and the book. When she got back, her husband asked, "Well how much did you give Little Johnny this time? She said, "Oh, I wrote 2 checks, one for $20, and the other for $1000" "That's $1020!!!" yelled her husband, "Are you crazy???" "Don't worry hon," she said, as she kissed her husband on the on top of his bald head, "I taped the $20 check to the cover of his book, but I put the $1000 one somewhere between the pages in chapter 19!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Students who arrive late for school must sign in at the office and pick up a late slip. The excuses can be rather creative, but this one should win an award: "Policeman in front of us." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The Louisiana State Department of Fish and Wildlife is advising hikers, hunters, fishermen, and golfers to take extra precautions and keep alert for alligators while in St. Tammany, Jefferson & Orleans Parish. They advise people to wear noise-producing devices such as "little bells" on their clothing to alert, but not startle the alligators, unexpectedly. They also advise the carrying of "pepper spray" in case of an encounter with an alligator. It's also a good idea to watch for fresh signs of alligator activity and be able to recognize the difference between young alligator and adult alligator droppings. Young alligator droppings are small, contain fish bones and possibly bird feathers. Adult alligators droppings have little bells in them and smell like pepper. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ While visiting my friends, I asked their five-year-old, Robert, if he was excited about attending kindergarten the next week and told him he'd have lots of fun, and the teacher would teach him how to print. "Oh, I already know how to print" he said. "But I can't do it right now because my computer isn't hooked up to the printer." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ At the fitness club my sister belongs to, she spotted a sign-up sheet posted on the bulletin board. "Attention instructors and trainers, " it read. "There will be a CPR renewal session. Sign up if you have expired." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The roof of the chapel was leaking and the priest asked for volunteers to raise funds for its repair. Mike offered his services. About a week later, the priest met Mike who was straggling from side to side as a result of having imbibed too freely. Mike was apologetic. "I'm collecting for the roof, Father," he said. "Every one of the neighbours I called on insisted on giving me a wee drop after paying his subscription." The priest was shocked. "Are there no teetotallers in the parish, Mike?" "Oh, yes, to be sure," said Mike. " I've written to them." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ My next-door neighbor and I frequently borrow things from each other. Not long ago, when I requested his ladder, he told me he had lent it to his son. Recalling a saying my grandmother used to repeat, I recited, "You should never lend anything to your kids, because you will never get it back." With that, he responded, "Well, it's not even my ladder. . . It's my dad's!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ I was sitting near the balcony door when I heard a thump outside. Looking out, I saw a child's rubber ball on my balcony, so I went and picked it up. When I glanced over the railing, I noticed a girl about five-years-old looking up at me. "Is this yours?" I asked. "No," she replied hesitantly, then added, "but it will be if you throw it back!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ A minister in a little church had been having trouble with the collections. One Sunday he announced, "Now, before we pass the collection plate, I would like to request that the person who stole the chickens from Brother Martin's henhouse please refrain from giving any money to the Lord. The Lord doesn't want money from a thief!" The collection plate was passed around, and for the first time in months.... everybody gave! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Moe: One of my pigs was sick so I gave him some sugar. Joe: Sugar? What for? Moe: Haven't you ever heard of sugar-cured ham? ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ **** WERE'S YOUR SIGN - STUPID **** One day in class, the teacher told everyone to turn to a blank sheet of paper in their notebooks. She noticed that Chip, the dumb jock, was having trouble with her directions. "Have you found a blank piece yet, Chip?" said the teacher. "Nope. I haven't," said the dumb jock. "Somebody went through and drew lines across all of the pages." &&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&& Shirley's ressypees e-zine We do take requests!! If you are looking for any particular recipe, send your request to: mailto:bigguyhereagain@cogeco.ca SUBSCRIBE RessyPees-subscribe@yahoogroups.com
&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&  &&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&& You can join The Funnies IT'S FREE To subscribe, Click on link below 25438-subscribe@zinester.com &&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&& **** TODAYS LINKS **** Learn CPR
World's Smallest Political
Quiz
http://www.theadvoc Veggie Art! http://www.shangral Amazing Squirrel! http://www.hallpass Photoshop Crash Course
http://tinyurl. Game Blob Wars
**** ON THIS DAY ****
and men. Features include
health facts, practical tips, fitness news, a
personal trainer, user
forums and event calendar.
http://www.heart.org/presenter.jhtml?identifier=3040778
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Organ and Tissue Donation/Transplanation http://www.organdonor.gov/ It takes less than a minute to go to their site and click on "donating a mammogram" for free (pink window in the middle). This doesn't cost you a thing. Their corporate sponsors/advertisers use the number of daily visits to donate mammogram in exchange for advertising. Here's the web site! Pass it along to people you know. http://www.thebreastcancersite.com & The Animal Rescue Site is having trouble getting enough people to click on it daily to meet their quota of getting free food donated every day to abused and neglected animals. It takes less than a minute to go to their site and click on "feed an animal in need" for free! This doesn't cost you a thing! Their corporate sponsors/advertisers use the number of daily visits to donate food to abandoned/neglected animals in exchange for advertising. Here's the web site! Pass it along to people you know! http://www.theanimalrescuesite.com ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Some people are like blisters. They don't show up until the work is done." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ This is a link for FREE virus protection http://avast.com It is excellent ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Pun of the
Day:
The boy swallowed a pillow, the
hospital described his condition
as
comfortable. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ By A.J. Perez, USA
TODAY The series that ran exclusively on ovals during the first nine seasons of its existence has changed recently. This season's championship will come down to how well drivers take to the winding road/street courses that make up two of the final four races. "They have to change with the times, and that's exactly what they've done," Dixon says. As recently as April 2002, IRL spokesman Fred Nation said the series had no plans to add any road courses and it was going to be an oval series for the foreseeable future. In April 2005, the series added a street course in St. Petersburg, Fla. It joined road courses in Watkins Glen, N.Y., and Sonoma, Calif. In 2007, the non-oval courses on the schedule jumped to five with the addition of the Mid-Ohio Sports Car Course and a street course on Detroit's Belle Isle. "We're still going to be an oval-based series, because we are based on the history and heritage of the Indianapolis 500 and the Indianapolis Motor Speedway," says Brian Barnhart, the IRL's president of competition and operations. "But if you go back to the original press release that announced the formation of the Indy Racing League, (founder) Tony (George) said it was our intention to run road and street courses. Unfortunately, our business model didn't present an opportunity to do that until 2005." FIND MORE STORIES
IN: Speedway | Champ | IRL | Watkins | Scott Dixon | Indycar Series |
Chicagoland Speedway | Chip Ganassi | Brian Barnhart "I think it gave us an edge at first, but most of the guys who were already here caught on pretty quickly," says Franchitti, who, like Dixon, made his IRL debut in 2003. Dixon, whose three-race win streak ended at Michigan International Speedway on Sunday, trails Franchitti by 24 points entering Saturday night's Meijer Indy 300 at Kentucky Speedway. But it might be how Dixon negotiates Infineon Raceway (Aug. 26) and Belle Isle (Sept. 2) that will determine whether he can unseat Franchitti, who won in Detroit when the race was on Champ Car's schedule in 1999. Chicagoland Speedway will host the season finale Sept. 9. "It's certainly added a new dimension to the formula," says team owner Chip Ganassi. "Winning a championship now takes a well-rounded driver as opposed to an oval-track or road-track specialist." Franchitti, who came through an end-over-end wreck at about 220 mph unscathed at MIS, says "it would be nice to see a couple more road courses," tracks that are run at slower speeds due to the added turns. Pit notes General manager Marty Gaunt left Team Red Bull on Monday in a split with the team described as "irreconcilable differences in philosophy," according to a release. The Toyota start-up has struggled in its first season with Brian Vickers (39th in points) and A.J. Allmendinger (47th). ? Fresh off of winning the Busch Series pole and finishing second at Montreal in his first NASCAR race, Patrick Carpentier will make his Nextel Cup debut at Watkins Glen International this weekend. Carpentier, who brings lots of road course experience from a successful open-wheel career, will substitute for Scott Riggs, whose No. 10 Dodge is outside the top 35 in owners points and doesn't have a guaranteed spot for Sunday's race. ?Ron Fellows, a road course specialist, will substitute for Tony Raines in the No. 96 Chevrolet in this weekend's Cup race. Contributing: Nate Ryan and wire reports **** COUNTRY CALENDAR
**** -9- Wyatt "Merle" Kilgore born Chickasha, OK 1934. Worked as Hank Junior's opening act for twenty-one years, prior to taking over as his manager. Bonnie Campbell joined Buck Owens band in 1947, when she was fifteen years old. They were married the following year and she became Bonnie Owens. The "Maumee Valley Jamboree," debuted on WTOD in Toledo, OH 1947. The Stanley Brothers had their first recording session for Mercury 1953. Cathy Fink, singer/guitarist/banjoist, born Baltimore, MD 1953. Jesse Ashlock, age 61, songwriter/fiddle player, "Texas Playboys" died in Austin, TX 1976. Randy Travis' album "Storms Of Life," went to #1 1986. The Father of Bluegrass, Bill Monroe, had double heart bypass surgery 1991. Bobby McBay, age 60, died Texarkana, Texas, in 1998 following a stroke. McBay was a former bass player in Bob Wills' Texas Playboys. Steve Runkle, age 49, singer/songwriter, died in Nashville, TN 2001. Proper Records released Red Foley's album "Tennessee Saturday Night" 2002. Hank Cochran inducted into the Mississippi Musicians Hall of Fame 2003. Sam Hogin, songwriter, twice nominated for the CMA's Song of the Year award, died in Nashville 2004. **** COUNTRY MUSIC NEWS **** Tillis, Emery, Gill to grace Hall of Fame 3 latest country music honorees bring membership to 101 By PETER COOPER Staff Writer The news was shocking enough to make Mel Tillis drop his eggplant. Tillis, 75, was in his garden in Ashland City when his cell phone rang with the news that he'd received country music's highest honor: induction into the Country Music Hall of Fame. Beloved for his songwriting, his singing and the pronounced stuttering that he turned to his advantage onstage, Tillis joins modern-day star Vince Gill and famed broadcast personality Ralph Emery in bringing the Hall's total membership to 101. Upon getting the good news from Country Music Association Chief Operating Officer Tammy Genovese, Tillis fumbled the eggplant he was holding. He's OK with that: A soiled vegetable seems a fair trade for country immortality. Emery was similarly stunned by Genovese's call to him, and Gill responded by getting in his car, tuning in to a country oldies show on satellite radio and weeping while driving around Nashville. The three honorees were at a Tuesday morning news conference at the Hall's Ford Theater, with Mayor Bill Purcell and luminaries including Brenda Lee and Barbara Mandrell on hand to offer words of praise and respect. Each inductee received standing ovations from a crowd composed of industry figures and some museum visitors who wandered into the building expecting to see historical exhibits and wound up watching history being made. Honorees are awed Gill, 50, serves as the president of the Hall of Fame and Museum's Board of Officers and Trustees, but that board has nothing to do with electing artists: Inductees are chosen by the CMA's panel of more than 300 anonymous electors, and the elections are done in categories. Gill enters as a "Career Achieved National Prominence Between 1975 and the Present" artist, while Tillis received a "Between World War II and 1975" nod and Emery joins as a "Non-Performer." "I could recite a phone book full of people that deserve to be in here before I do," said Gill, whose prodigious musical skills are matched by his knowledge of and affection for musicians who came before him. Gill has won more Grammy Awards than any other male country artist and has won 18 CMA Awards, but none of his trophies can match knowing that his Hall of Fame plaque will hang on the same wall as the plaques that read "Chet Atkins" and "The Carter Family." What Johnny Carson was to actors and comedians, 74-year-old Ralph Emery has been to country musicians. His 50 years in radio and television have found him interviewing numerous Hall of Famers, and now his likeness will reside alongside theirs in the Hall's rotunda. Tuesday morning, he looked around that rotunda in the early morning hours before the Hall opened for business. "My great-grandchildren can come in here and find out who I was," Emery said, his somber voice as familiar and distinctive as that of any singer on the hit parade. HURRAY-----IT'S ABOUT TIME THE CMA DID SOMETHING RIGHT....JIM Tillis, Emery and Gill career highlights Tillis, Emery and Gill career highlights MEL TILLIS Born ? Aug. 8, 1932, in Tampa, Fla. Hit songs include ? "I Ain't Never," "Ain't No California," "Coca Cola Cowboy," "Southern Rains" Hit songs penned for others include ? "Ruby, Don't Take Your Love To Town" (Kenny Rogers and the First Edition), "Detroit City" (Bobby Bare), "Tupelo County Jail" (Webb Pierce) Career turning point ? In the late 1950s, Tillis toured with Minnie Pearl, who noticed that he never introduced songs or talked to the audience. He told Pearl that he was afraid the audience would laugh at his stutter, to which she replied, "Let 'em laugh. Laughs are hard to get." From then on, his stutter became part of the show, and part of his appeal as a performer. Hall of Fame credentials ? Scored 36 Top 10 country singles and six No. 1 hits; named CMA Entertainer of the Year in 1976; starred in major motion pictures including Cannonball Run and Every Which Way But Loose; inducted into the Grand Ole Opry in 2006. RALPH EMERY Born ? March 10, 1933, in McEwen, Tenn. Hit song ? Though known as a radio and television personality, Emery recorded a Billboard country hit in 1961. His "Hello Fool," an answer to Faron Young's "Hello Walls," reached No. 4 on the Billboard country singles chart. Career turning points ? In 1957, WSM hired him to be a late-night disc jockey. He began bringing in country music artists for informal interviews and jam sessions, revealing their personalities and talents. In the mid-1960s, Emery began hosting a live morning television show on WSM-TV that ran for decades. In 1983, he took over the Nashville Now show on The Nashville Network. That show ran 10 years. Hall of Fame credentials ? Easily the most famous and important TV and radio personality in country music history. VINCE GILL Born ? April 12, 1957, in Norman, Okla. Hit songs include ? "Don't Let Our Love Start Slippin' Away," "I Still Believe In You," "When I Call Your Name" and "One More Last Chance." Career turning points ? In 1979, Gill joined Pure Prairie League as a lead singer and became the voice of the hit single "Let Me Love You Tonight." He met his future producers, Tony Brown and Emory Gordy Jr., when he joined Rodney Crowell's backing band, The Cherry Bombs, in 1981. Gill achieved true country stardom in 1990, when he scored with hits "Never Knew Lonely" and "When I Call Your Name." He co-hosted the CMA Awards in 1992 and began a 12-year string as host for that show, and he released These Days, a diverse four-CD set that ranks with his best work, in 2006. Hall of Fame credentials ? One of country's finest vocalists (lead and harmony) of the past 20 years; has sold more than 22 million albums, won 18 CMA Awards (including two entertainer trophies and five male vocalist prizes) and 18 Grammy Awards; has worked to ensure the future of the Hall of Fame through his "All For The Hall" fundraising campaign and as president of the Hall's Board of Officers and Trustees. ? PETER COOPER  **** Amy's Kitchen **** Orange Glazed Baked Ham Easter ham, basted with orange glaze, and made with a tasty honey- mustard sauce. 1 (3 to 4 lb.) fully cooked boneless cured ham 1 cup orange juice 1/4 cup firmly packed brown sugar 1/4 cup country-style Dijon mustard 1/4 cup honey 1/2 teaspoon liquid smoke Heat oven to 350?F. Place ham into ungreased 13x9" baking pan. Pour orange juice over ham. Combine remaining ingredients in medium bowl. Spoon sauce over entire ham. Bake, basting every 15 minutes with pan juice, for 70 to 80 minutes or until heated through. Serve ham with pan juices. Make 10 servings. **** TODAY'S USELESS FACT **** How long
does it take an oyster to make a pearl?
Hey, Let's be careful out there *+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+ PLEASE Don't take anything you see in the Funnies personally. The contents are meant to be jokes, nothing more. Everyone & everything is an equal opportunity target here. EVERYONE IS FAIR GAME The Funnies are strictly an opt-in service. We do not sell, lease, loan, or give our subscribers' addresses to anyone for any reason. Our features are intended to be for entertainment only. Disclaimer : All of my materials are Borrowed
from various areas on the web and from my readers. All
are believed to be public
domain . If you hold copyright on
any of these materials please inform me so I may give the proper credit,
or remove it which ever you prefer. ~ GOD BLESS AMERICA ~ To subscribe, Click on a link below 25438-subscribe@zinester.com ~ To unsubscribe from this opt-in mailing list click on link at the end of this mailing ~ Regarding any problems In accordance with the 2004 Can-Spam act you can contact me with question or comments at: JIM4615@JOINK.COM or Jim Dowers P.O. Box 521 Carlisle, IN 47838-0521 &&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&& Miss getting The Funnies,or is your ISP blocking mail again? No problem To Read the Funnies on line. Just click on this link Archives Index: http://archives.zinester.com/25438 &&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&& Unsubscribe link is at the END of this list God Bless America , Our Land , Forever May She Stand &&&&&&&&&& THIS DOCUMENT IS VIRUS FREE Scanned by Avast virus protection ~ Unsubscription Email: 25438-unsubscribe@zinester.com Unsubscription URL: http://www.zinester.com/mpb/unsub.cgi?25438
|
|
| << August08, 2007 - The Daily Funnies |
August10, 2007 - The Daily Funnies >> |
|
The Funnies Archives Index
|
Subscribe
|
|
|
Archives powered by Zinester's Mailing List Service
Details on The Funnies |
Browse for more newsletters at Zinester's Ezine Directory
Managed by Zinester's Mailing List Management |
