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The Funnies
"Friends are God's way of taking care of
us."
These
are clean jokes. However,
They are,
PG - Not intended for younger
readers - PG
Welcome New
Subscribers
Anyone without a sense
of humor is at the mercy
of the rest of us.
Heaven Help
Them
Remember
It is easier to
get older than it is to get wiser.
TUESDAY DECEMBER 13,2005
THOUGHT FOR TODAY: No one
ever injured their eyesight by looking on the bright side of
things.
The first Texan says, "My name is Roger. I
own 250,000 acres. I have
1,000 head of cattle and they call my place The
Jolly Roger."
The second Texan says, "My name is John. I own 350,000 acres. I
have
5,000 head of cattle and they call my place Big Johns."
They both
look down at the Jewish man who says, "My name is Irving
and I own 300
acres."
Roger looks down at him and say, "300 Acres? What do you
raise?"
"Nothing" Irving says.
"Well then, what do you call it?", asked
John.
The little old Jewish man says, "Downtown Dallas."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Finished trying on a
number of pairs of work boots at the shoe store, my husband made his selection.
He sorted the ones on the floor, repacked them in their boxes and then bought
the ones he'd chosen. A month later he took them out for the first time, only to
discover he had two left boots. When he went back to the store, the clerk
beamed. "We've been waiting for you!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A married couple in their early 60s was out celebrating
their 35th
wedding anniversary in a quiet, romantic little restaurant when
suddenly; a tiny yet beautiful fairy appeared on their table and
said:
"For being such an exemplary married couple and for being
faithful to each
other for all this time, I will grant you each a
wish".
"Ooh... I want to
travel around the world with my darling husband,"
said the woman.
The
fairy moved her magic wand and abracadabra! two tickets for a new
round-the-world luxury liner appeared in her hands.
Then it was the man's
turn. He thought for a moment and said: "Well
this is all very romantic, but
an opportunity like this only occurs
once in a lifetime. So I'm sorry my
love, but my wish is to have a
wife who is 30 years younger than me".
The
wife and the fairy were deeply disappointed, but a wish is a
wish... So the
fairy made a circle with her magic stick and
abracadabra! the husband became
92 years old.
What is the moral of this story? Men might be idiots sometimes,
but
fairies are always female.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"This
house," said the real estate salesman, "has both its good
points and its bad
points. To show you I'm honest, I'm going to tell
you about both.
"The
disadvantages are that there is a chemical plant one block south
and a
slaughterhouse a block north."
"What are the advantages?" inquired the
prospective buyer.
"The advantage is that you can always tell which way the
wind is blowing."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
In the old days, when young couples went
off on their honeymoons by train, the bridegroom said, "Wait here, dear, and
I'll get the tickets." So he did, but long habit would not be denied and he had
not yet gotten used to the fact that he was traveling by twos. He had bought one
round-trip ticket. He came rushing back to the bride, who looked at the single
ticket in his hand, and whose bright blue eyes promptly filled with tears. The
bridegroom looked at her with astonishment, then with horror at his ticket, and
in the blink of an eye set all straight by saying, "Oh, darling, in all the
excitement I completely forgot to buy a ticket for myself."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
This little boy
was waiting on his mother to come out of a store.
As he waited, he was
approached
by a man who asked,
"Son, can you tell me where the Post
Office is?"
The little boy replied,
"Sure,... just go straight down the
street a couple of blocks and turn
to your right." The man thanked the boy
kindly and said, "I'm the new
Preacher in town.
I'd like for you to come
to church on Sunday. I'll show you how to get
to Heaven."
The little boy
replied with a chuckle,
"Aawww, come on;
you don't even know the way to
the Post Office!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I was having breakfast sitting on
the edge of my hospital bed when a nurse came into my room to take a blood
sample. Remembering that I had had to fast prior to a blood test a few years
earlier, I asked her if it was all right for her to take a sample while I was
eating. "Not to worry," she reassured me, "this is a blood and breakfast
establishment."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Men spend thousands
on hair transplants and toupees when what is really needed is more women who
like bald men.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Four football fans go rock
climbing one afternoon, a Michigan fan, an Ohio State fan, a Notre Dame fan, and
a Penn State fan. They had been arguing all the way up the mountain about who
among them was the most "die-hard" fan. Upon reaching the top of the mountain,
the Notre Dame fan proclaimed to the other four, "This is for the Fighting
Irish!" and promptly threw himself off the mountain as a form of sacrifice. Not
to be outdone by a Notre Dame fan, the Penn State fan jumped up and shouted,
"This is for the Nittany Lions!" and then threw himself off the mountain.
Refusing to be outdone by the Notre Dame and Penn State fans, the Ohio State fan
rose to his feet and yelled at the top of his lungs "This is for the Buckeyes!"
and without any hesitation pushed the Michigan fan off the
mountain.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Barbie
One day a father gets out of work and on his way home
he remembers that
it's his daughter's birthday. He pulls over to a toy store
and asks the
salesperson,
"How much is the Barbie on the display window?"
The salesperson answers,
" Which one? We have:
Work out Barbie for $19.95
Shopping Barbie for $19.95
Beach Barbie for $19.95
Disco Barbie for
$19.95
Divorced Barbie for $265.95
The amazed father asks: "What?
Why is the Divorced Barbie $265.95 and the others only $19.95?"
The
salesperson annoyingly answers : "Sir..., "Divorced Barbie comes
with:
Ken's Car,
Ken's House,
Ken's Boat,
Ken's Furniture,
Ken's
Computer and...
One of Ken's Friends.
****
Quickies ****
Marriage is the
only war in which you sleep with the enemy. -
Unknown
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
You can lead a man to Congress, but you
can't make him
think.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&
Shirley's
ressypees e-zine
We do take requests!! If you are looking for any particular
recipe,
send your request to: mailto:bigguyhereagain@cogeco.ca
**** HEALTH NEWS ****
Thoracoscopic surgery increases options
LOS ANGELES, -- Los Angeles surgeons say some elderly pa-
tients with early stage, non-small cell lung cancer might
benefit from a minimally invasive surgical procedure.
Thoracic surgeons at Cedars-Sinai Medical Center in Los
Angeles say when such cancers are detected at an early,
localized stage, surgical removal often can prevent meta-
stasis. But while some elderly patients might not be good
candidates for the physical demands of open chest surgery,
a
study of 159 patients between ages 80 and 94 suggests
video-assisted thoracoscopic surgery should be considered
a
viable option. "Some patients and their doctors wonder
why a
person that age should bother to go through any
major pulmonary
surgery," said Dr. Robert McKenna Jr.,
the study's lead author
and chief of thoracic surgery and
trauma at Cedars-Sinai. He
said whether the patient is 80
or 95, if he or she is in
reasonably good physical condi-
tion without any imminently life
threatening problems,
such surgery involves very low risk and
produces good
results. The research is described in journal
The
American
Surgeon.
UCSF scientists find new facts about
HIV
SAN FRANCISCO, -- University of California-San
Francisco
scientists have discovered how the human
immunodeficiency
virus can be kept dormant and hidden in immune
cells. The
findings suggest new potential therapeutic approaches
for
viral eradication from infected patients, lead author
Dr.
Warner Greene, professor of medicine, microbiology
and
immunology, said. Current combined antiviral
therapies
that target essential components of replicating HIV
fail
to achieve eradication of the virus from infected
patients.
That, said Greene, is due in part to the presence of
rare
cells harboring silent copies of the HIV virus -- a
danger-
ous reservoir of literally "invisible" viruses that
might
potentially reactivate and seed a new infection.
Greene
and colleagues report significant progress toward
the
understanding of the molecular mechanisms responsible
for
maintenance of HIV latency. Specifically, the team
demon-
strated viral gene expression is actively repressed
by
the inhibitory NF-kappaB p50 protein. That inhibition
is
mediated by an enzyme called HDAC1, which is capable
of
shutting down gene expression in its vicinity. The
study
is explained online in The EMBO
Journal.
Trust-building hormone found
BETHESDA, Md., -- Scientists at the National Institute of
Mental Health have discovered how a brain chemical recently
found to boost trust appears to work. A brain imaging study
suggests the hormone reduces activity and weakens connec-
tions in fear-processing circuitry. Scans of the hormone
oxytocin's effect on human brain function reveal it quells
the brain's fear hub, the amygdala, and its brainstem relay
stations in response to fearful stimuli. That suggests new
approaches to treating diseases thought to involve amygdala
dysfunction and social fear, such as social phobia, autism
and possibly schizophrenia Dr. Andreas Meyer-Lindenberg and
her NIMH colleagues detail their research in the Dec. issue
of the Journal of Neuroscience.
**** ON THIS DAY
****
Pa and The
Rifle
Pa never had much compassion for the lazy or
those who
squandered their means and then never had enough for
the
necessities. But for those who were genuinely in need, his
heart
was as big as all outdoors. It was from him that I
learned the greatest
joy in life comes from giving,
not from receiving.
It was
Christmas Eve 1881. I was fifteen years old and feeling
like the world
had caved in on me because there just hadn't been
enough money to buy me the
rifle that I'd wanted for Christmas.
We did the chores early that night for
some reason. I just
figured Pa wanted a little extra time so we could
read in the
Bible.
After supper was over I took my boots off and
stretched out in
front of the fireplace and waited for Pa to get down the
old
Bible. I was still feeling sorry for myself and, to be honest,
I
wasn't in much of a mood to read Scriptures. But Pa didn't
get the
Bible, instead he bundled up again and went outside.
I couldn't figure it out
because we had already done all the
chores. I didn't worry about it
long though, I was too busy
wallowing in self-pity.
Soon Pa came
back in. It was a cold clear night out and there
was ice in his
beard. "Come on, Matt," he said. "Bundle up
good, it's cold out
tonight." I was really upset then. Not only
wasn't I getting the
rifle for Christmas, now Pa was dragging me
out in the cold, and for no
earthly reason that I could see.
We'd already done all the chores, and I
couldn't think of anything
else that needed doing, especially not on a night
like this.
But I knew Pa was not very patient at one dragging one's
feet
when he'd told them to do something, so I got up and put my
boots
back on and got my cap, coat, and mittens. Ma gave me a
mysterious
smile as I opened the door to leave the house.
Something was up, but I didn't
know what.
Outside, I became even more dismayed. There in
front of the
house was the work team, already hitched to the big
sled.
Whatever it was we were going to do wasn't going to be a
short,
quick, little job. I could tell. We never hitched up this
sled
unless we were going to haul a big load.
Pa was already up
on the seat, reins in hand. I reluctantly
climbed up beside him.
The cold was already biting at me.
I wasn't happy. When I was on, Pa
pulled the sled around the
house and stopped in front of the woodshed.
He got off and I
followed. "I think we'll put on the high sideboards,"
he said.
"Here, help me." The high sideboards! It had been a bigger
job
than I wanted to do with just the low sideboards on, but
whatever it
was we were going to do would be a lot bigger with
the high sideboards
on.
After we had exchanged the sideboards, Pa went into the
woodshed
and came out with an armload of wood---the wood I'd spent
all
summer hauling down from the mountain, and then all Fall sawing
into
blocks and splitting. What was he doing? Finally I
said
something. "Pa," I asked, "what are you doing?" You been by
the
Widow Jensen's lately?" he asked. The Widow Jensen lived
about
two miles down the road. Her husband had died a year or
so
before and left her with three children, the oldest being eight.
Sure,
I'd been by, but so what? "Yeah," I said, "Why?" "I rode
by just today," Pa
said. "Little Jakey was out digging around
in the woodpile trying to
find a few chips. They're out of
wood, Matt."
That was all
he said and then he turned and went back into the
woodshed for another
armload of wood. I followed him. We
loaded the sled so high that
I began to wonder if the horses
would be able to pull it. Finally, Pa
called a halt to our
loading, then we went to the smoke house and Pa took
down a big
ham and a side of bacon. He handed them to me and told me
to
put them in the sled and wait.
When he returned he was
carrying a sack of flour over his right
shoulder and a smaller sack of
something in his left hand.
"What's in the little sack?" I asked.
"Shoes. They're out of
shoes. Little Jakey just had gunny sacks
wrapped around his
feet when he was out in the woodpile this morning. I
got the
children a little candy too. It just wouldn't be
Christmas
without a little candy."
We rode the two miles to
Widow Jensen's pretty much in silence.
I tried to think through what Pa was
doing. We didn't have much
by worldly standards. Of course, we
did have a big woodpile,
though most of what was left now was still in the
form of logs
that I would have to saw into blocks and split before we
could
use it. We also had meat and flour, so we could spare that,
but
I knew we didn't have any money, so why was Pa buying them shoes
and
candy?
Really, why was he doing any of this? Widow Jensen had
closer
neighbors than us; it shouldn't have been our concern. We
came
in from the blind side of the Jensen house and unloaded the wood
as
quietly as possible, then we took the meat and flour and
shoes to the
door. We knocked. The door opened a crack and a
timid voice said,
"Who is it?" "Lucas Miles, Ma'am, and my son,
Matt. Could we come in
for a bit?"
Widow Jensen opened the door and let us in. She
had a blanket
wrapped around her shoulders. The children were wrapped
in
another and were sitting in front of the fireplace by a very
small fire
that hardly gave off any heat at all. Widow Jensen
fumbled with a match
and finally lit the lamp. "We brought you
a few things, Ma'am," Pa said
and set down the sack of flour. I
put the meat on the table. Then
Pa handed her the sack that had
the shoes in it.
She opened it
hesitantly and took the shoes out one pair at a
time. There was a pair
for her and one for each of the
children---sturdy shoes, the best, shoes that
would last. I
watched her carefully. She bit her lower lip to
keep it from
trembling and then tears filled her eyes and started
running
down her cheeks. She looked up at Pa like she wanted to
say
something, but it wouldn't come out.
"We brought a load of
wood too, Ma'am," Pa said. He turned to
me and said, "Matt, go bring in
enough to last awhile. Let's
get that fire up to size and heat this
place up." I wasn't the
same person when I went back out to bring in the
wood. I had a
big lump in my throat and as much as I hate to admit it,
there
were tears in my eyes too.
In my mind I kept seeing those
three kids huddled around the
fireplace and their mother standing there with
tears running
down her cheeks with so much gratitude in her heart that
she
couldn't speak. My heart swelled within me and a joy that
I'd
never known before, filled my soul. I had given at
Christmas
many times before, but never when it had made so much
difference.
I could see we were literally saving the lives of these
people.
I soon had the fire blazing and everyone's spirits
soared.
The kids started giggling when Pa handed them each a piece of
candy
and Widow Jensen looked on with a smile that probably hadn't
crossed
her face for a long time. She finally turned to us.
"God bless you,"
she said. "I know the Lord has sent you.
The children and I have been
praying that he would send one of his
angels to spare us."
In
spite of myself, the lump returned to my throat and the tears
welled up in my
eyes again. I'd never thought of Pa in those
exact terms before, but
after Widow Jensen mentioned it I could
see that it was probably true.
I was sure that a better man
than Pa had never walked the earth. I
started remembering all
the times he had gone out of his way for Ma and me,
and many
others. The list seemed endless as I thought on
it.
Pa insisted that everyone try on the shoes before we left.
I
was amazed when they all fit and I wondered how he had known
what sizes to
get. Then I guessed that if he was on an errand
for the Lord that the
Lord would make sure he got the right sizes.
Tears were running
down Widow Jensen's face again when we stood
up to leave. Pa took each
of the kids in his big arms and gave
them a hug. They clung to him and
didn't want us to go.
I could see that they missed their Pa, and I was glad
that I
still had mine.
At the door Pa turned to Widow Jensen and
said, "The Mrs.
wanted me to invite you and the children over for
Christmas
dinner tomorrow. The turkey will be more than the three of
us
can eat, and a man can get cantankerous if he has to eat turkey
for too
many meals. We'll be by to get you about eleven. It'll
be nice to
have some little ones around again. Matt, here,
hasn't been little for
quite a spell." I was the youngest.
My two brothers and two sisters had
all married and had moved away.
Widow Jensen nodded and said, "Thank you,
Brother Miles.
I don't have to say, "'May the Lord bless you,' I know for
certain
that He will."
Out on the sled I felt a warmth that came
from deep within and I
didn't even notice the cold. When we had gone a
ways, Pa turned
to me and said, "Matt, I want you to know something.
Your ma
and me have been tucking a little money away here and there
all
year so we could buy that rifle for you, but we didn't have
quite
enough.
Then yesterday a man who owed me a little money from years
back
came by to make things square. Your ma and me were
real
excited, thinking that now we could get you that rifle, and I
started
into town this morning to do just that. But on the way
I saw little
Jakey out scratching in the woodpile with his feet
wrapped in those gunny
sacks and I knew what I had to do.
Son, I spent the money for shoes and a
little candy for those
children. I hope you understand."
I
understood, and my eyes became wet with tears again.
I understood very well,
and I was so glad Pa had done it.
Now the rifle seemed very low on my list of
priorities. Pa had
given me a lot more. He had given me the look
on Widow Jensen's
face and the radiant smiles of her three
children.
For the rest of my life, Whenever I saw any of the
Jensen's, or
split a block of wood, I remembered, and remembering
brought
back that same joy I felt riding home beside Pa that night.
Pa had
given me much more than a rifle that night, he had given
me the best
Christmas of my life.
~by Rian B. Anderson~
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"LORD, SHRINK MY BODY"
LORD, SHRINK MY BODY OR STRETCH
MY CLOTHES
Lord, shrink my body or stretch my clothes.
I've gained more
weight and heaven knows
I've tried on everything I own
And can't believe
how much I've grown.
Lord, shrink my body or stretch my clothes.
I can't pull up
these brand new hose.
Where did I get this extra weight?
Is being fat my
awful fate?
Lord, shrink my body or stretch my clothes.
I bend and just
can't reach my toes.
You know that I'd be filled with glee
If you could
melt some pounds off me.
Lord, shrink my body or stretch my clothes.
This dress right
here is one I chose
To wear to church last Sunday night;
It must have
shrunk and I'm a sight
Lord, shrink my body or stretch my clothes.
I know the answer, I
suppose.
To you my problems I can bring,
But melting FAT is not Your
thing**** HEADS UP FOLKS ****
These Are My Causes Please Help
This is a
link for FREE virus protection
http://avast.com
It is
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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Organ and Tissue Donation/Transplanation
http://www.organdonor.gov/
It takes less than a minute to go to their site and click on "donating a
mammogram"
for free (pink window in the middle). This doesn't cost you a
thing. Their corporate
sponsors/advertisers use the number of daily visits
to donate mammogram
in exchange for
advertising.
Here's the web site! Pass it along to
people you know.
http://www.thebreastcancersite.com&
The Animal Rescue Site is having trouble getting enough people to
click on it daily to meet their quota
of getting free food donated
every day to abused and neglected animals. It takes less than a minute to
go
to their site and click on "feed an animal in need" for free! This
doesn't cost you a thing! Their corporate
sponsors/advertisers use the
number of daily visits to donate food to abandoned/neglected animals in
exchange
for advertising.
Here's the web site! Pass it along to
people you know!
http://www.theanimalrescuesite.com
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
This is a link
for FREE virus protection
http://avast.com
It is
excellent
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Thoughts or Comments
jokes or stories
U
Send'em and I'll print'em
Just keep it clean.A lota kids read
this
jim4615@earthlink.net
Subject
Line--- The Funnies
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
**** COUNTRY
CALANDER ****
1936 Session guitarist Reggie Young born in
Caruthersville,
Mo.
1951 La Costa (Tucker)
born in Seminole, Texas
1972 Hank Williams III born in
Houston, Texas
1970 Dolly Parton's first Number
One single, "Joshua,"
debuted on the charts
1987 Cajun musician Clifton Chenier died
1923 Henry Whitter recorded "The Wreck on the
Southern
Old 97"
1957 Jerry Lee
Lewis, age 22, married his 13-year-old
cousin, Myra Gale Brown;
the marriage lasted 13 years
but the scandal wrecked Lewis'
career for a decade
1982 Mike Snider wed
Sabrina ("Sweetie") Goodwin
**** COUNTRY MUSIC NEWS ****
Garth Brooks and Trisha Yearwood married Saturday at their
Oklahoma home.
This was the second marriage for Brooks, who has three
daughters, and third for Yearwood, who previously was married to Robert Reynolds
of The Mavericks.
Brooks proposed to Yearwood in May before about 7,0000 fans
at Buck Owens' Crystal Palace in Bakersfield, Cal.
Brooks just released a
boxed set, including one disc of previously unreleased recordings, in late
November available only at Wal-Mart.
Yearwood released "Jasper County" in
September and received two Grammy nominations Thursday.
* * * * * * *
CONGRATULATIONS TO GRETCHEN WILSON ON HER GRAMMY
NOMINATIONS!
Nominations for the 48th annual
Grammy Awards were announced last week and
Gretchen has been nominated
for FOUR:
~ Best Female Country Vocal Performance: "All Jacked Up"
~ Best
Country Collaboration w/Vocals: "Politically Uncorrect" Gretchen Wilson and
Merle Haggard
~ Best Country Song: "All Jacked Up"
~ Best Country Album:
All Jacked Up
The 48th Annual GRAMMY Awards will be held on Wednesday,
February 8, at Staples Center in Los Angeles and will be broadcast live on CBS
from 8 - 11:30 p.m. (ET/PT). Mark your calendars to tune
in!
Brad Paisley and Gretchen Wilson each garnered four Grammy
nominations Thursday, the most for country performers.
Best country album
nominees were Faith Hill for "Fireflies," Alison Krauss + Union Station for
"Lonely Runs Both Ways," Paisley for "Time Well Wasted," Wilson for "All Jacked
Up" and Trisha Yearwood for "Jasper County."
Nominees for best female country
vocal performance were Emmylou Harris for "The Connection" from "The Very Best
of Emmylou Harris: Heartaches & Highways; Faith ill's "Mississippi Girl"
from "Fireflies; Wilson's "All jacked Up' the title track; Lee Ann Womack for "I
May Hate Myself in the Morning" from "There's More Where That Came From" and
Yearwood for "Georgia Rain" from "Jasper County."
Best male vocal nominees
were George Jones for "Funny How Time Slips Away," Toby Keith's "As Good As I
Once Was," Delbert McClinton for "Midnight Communion," Willie Nelson for "Good
Ol' Boys," Paisley for "Alcohol," an Keith Urban for "You'll Think of Me."
Up
for best duo or group were Big & Rich for "Comin' To Your City," Brooks
& Dunn for "Play Something Country," the Dixie Chicks for "I Hope,"
"Restless" from Alison Krauss + Union Station; an Bless the Broken Road by
Rascal Flatts.
Best country song nominees were Paisley for "Alcohol," Vicky
McGehee, John Rich and Wilson for "All Jacked Up," Boyd, Hanna and Hummon for
"Bless the Broken Road," Keb Mo, Martie Maguire, Natalie Maines and Emily
Robison for "I Hope" and Odie Blackmon for "I May Hate Myself in the
Morning."
Best country collaboration with vocals was Brooks & Dunn,
Sheryl Crow and Vince Gill for "Building Bridges," Rodney Crowell and Harris for
"Shelter From the Storm," Tim McGraw and Hill for "Like We Never Loved At All,"
Nelson and Norah Jones for "Dreams Come True" and Merle Haggard and Wilson for
"Politically Uncorrect."
Best country instrumental nominees were "I'll Fly
Away" by Charlie Daniels; "Who's Your Uncle?" by Jerry Douglas, Sam Bush and
B?©la Fleck; "Unionhouse Branch" by Alison Krauss + Union Station'; "Scotch &
Chocolate" by Nickel Creek and "Time Warp" from Paisley.
Best bluegrass album
nominees were Blue Highway for "Marbletown;" Cherryholmes for their self-titled
debut; The Grascals self-titled debut; Del McCoury Band for "The Company We
Keep" and Rhonda Vincent and the Rage for "Ragin' Live."
"Bless the Broken
Road" was nominated for song of the year. Bobby Boyd, Jeff Hanna and Marcus
Hummon wrote the song, a big hit for Rascal Flatts. Sugarland was nominated for
best new artist going against Ciara, Fall Out Boy, Keane and John Legend.
The
48th Annual Grammy Awards will be held Feb. 8 in Los Angeles.
* * * * * * *
Carrie Underwood
regained the top spot on the Billboard country charts from Kenny Chesney for the
week ending Dec. 17 with "Some Hearts,", while on the song chart, Joe Nichols
was first with "Tequila Makes Her Clothes Fall Off."
Nichols took over the
top from Dierks Bentley's "Come a Little Closer," which fell to second. Kenny
Chesney was down one to third with "Who You'd Be Today." Garth Brooks stayed
fourth with "Good Ride Cowboy," while Billy Currington was up one to fifth with
"Must Be Doin' Somethin' Right."
On the album chart, Chesney's "The Road And
the Radio" was second. "The Legend of Johnny Cash" was third, followed by Reba
McEntire's "Reba: #1's in fourth and Rascal Flatts' "Feels Like Today"
fifth.
On the overall top 200, Underwood was 3rd, Chesney 4th, Cash 14th,
McEntire 15th and Rascal Flatts 18th.
| Lila McCann Marries |
 |
|
Broken Bow Records artist Lila McCann married Mike Wolofsky. The
wedding, held at the Hermitage Hotel in Nashville, was attended by a small
group of close friends and family. The happy couple, who reside in
Nashville, met through mutual friends and started dating in 2002.
In the
December 19th issue of Country Weekly, there will be photos and additional
details from the magazine??™s exclusive coverage of Lila??™s wedding.
McCann
is currently on tour with John Brickman supporting the album "Jim
Brickman: The Disney Songbook" album which was released on October 4,
2005. She is also planning a new album to be released early next
year. |
Station Inn Owner Releases Debut Album
The owner of Station Inn, Nashville's famous bluegrass
venue, has released his debut album on his own label. J.T.
Gray's It's About Time features guitarist Bobby Nicholas,
bassist Terry Eldredge, banjoist David Talbot, fiddler
Shad
Cobb and Dobro player Josh Ulbrich. Three of the
songs were
recorded live at the venue. Gray accepted the
International
Bluegrass Music Association's (IBMA)
distinguished achievement
award in 2003. He has owned the
club for more than 30
years.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Keith, Larry,
Underwood Win Billboard Music Awards
Toby Keith,
Larry the Cable Guy and Carrie Underwood won
multiple trophies
at the 2005 Billboard Music Awards on
Tuesday night in Las
Vegas. Keith took country artist of
the year and country albums
artist of the year. Larry the
Cable Guy won comedy artist of the
year and comedy album
of the year (for The Right to Bare Arms).
Underwood won
for top-selling Hot 100 song of the year and
top-selling
country single of the year ("Inside Your
Heaven/
Independence Day"), as well as for country single
sales
artist of the year. Winners are determined by
year-end
sales and radio
airplay.
****
Amy's Kitchen ****
CHRISTMAS TREE
BREAD
2/3 cup milk
1/2
cup granulated sugar
1 large egg, yolk and white
separated
3/4 cup (4 ounces) diced dried fruit mix
2 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
1 tablespoon baking
powder
1 1/2 teaspoons pumpkin pie spice
(or 3/4 tsp ground cinnamon & 3/4 tsp
ground cloves)
1/2 teaspoon salt
1 stick cold,
unsalted butter, cut to small pieces
Granulated
sugar
DIRECTIONS:
Check to see that one rack
is in bottom third of oven and
heat oven to 425 degrees F.
Measure milk in a 2-cup measure,
add sugar and egg yolk, stir to
mix well.Stir in dried fruit.
Let stand until ready to use. Put
flour, baking powder, spice,
and salt into a large bowl, stir to
mix well. Add butter and
cut in with pastry blender or rub in
with fingers, until
mixture looks like fine granules. Stir milk
mixture and pour
over flour mixture. Stir with a fork until a
soft dough forms.
Turn out dough onto a lightly floured surface
and give 10
kneads. (If very sticky, let stand 3 or 4 minutes or
add a
little more flour.) Cut off about one-fourth of the
dough.
Put remaining dough on an ungreased cookie sheet at least
16
inches long. Using both rolling pin and fingers, pat and
roll
dough into a flat triangle about 12 inches long and 9
inches
wide across the bottom. With scissors, make about ten
diagonal
cuts down each long side of the triangle, cutting to
within
about 1 inch of the center.Shape a small piece of
reserved
dough into a trunk at bottom of tree and remaining
dough into
a "pot." Dough may now be covered with plastic wrap
and
refrigerated for a couple of hours or frozen for up to
2
weeks. Bake tree 10 minutes. Beat egg white with a
fork
until broken up. Brush over hot bread, sprinkle with
sugar.
Bake 5 to 8 minutes longer, until light brown. With
two
spatulas, carefully transfer tree to a wire rack. If
possible,
cool at least 2 hours before serving. Let guests break
off
small pieces.
Yield: 10-12 Small
Servings
**** WABASH VALLEY WEATHER ****
http://www.wtwo.com/
Weather Summary:
Monday
night will be partly cloudy but due to some melting snow, there
may be some
areas of fog overnight. Tuesday looks fine with partly sunny
skies and highs
in the mid 30`s. The concern comes on Wednesday. A storm
system will move
our way by mid week. There will be a low pressure to
our north and one to
our south and to make it more complicated,
temperatures will be around the
freezing mark. Right now, I think it
will start as some snow and or freezing
rain early Wednesday then change
to rain and then back to snow by Wednesday
night. It`s a tough call, but
we`ll keep a close on on it as we get closer.
By Thursday, it will be
just some light snow or flurries. Friday into the
weekend looks dry and
cool.
-- Jesse Walker
Weather Factoid:
There has been 6.5" of snow so far this month here at NewsChannel 2.
Monday Night
Partly Cloudy, Some Fog Possible
Low 19
Tuesday
Partly Sunny
High 35
Tuesday NIght
Becoming
Cloudy
Low 25
Wednesday
Snow / Rain
High 38
Low 25
Thursday
Some Light Snow
HIgh 35
Low 25
Friday
Mostly Cloudy
High 30
Low 22
Saturday
Partly Sunny
High
35
Low 22
Sunday
Partly Sunny
HIgh 36
Low 23
Monday
Mostly Cloudy
High 30
Low 20
****A PARTING THOUGHT
****
Do you ever have the
feeling that you'd need a head start
just to finish last?
TOON
TIME
Can I Call You Back
http://buffalosjokes.com/20702.htm
Cute?
http://buffalosjokes.com/12546.htm
Phone
http://www.buffalosjokes.com/20701.htm
Gettin' Chewed Out ! http://www.AikensLaughs.com/forfun/funny1134.html
Internet Aggression
http://www.ezines4all.com/ct200411/008.htm
Breathing
http://buffalosjokes.com/20708.htm
Aging
http://buffalosjokes.com/20707.htm
Age
http://buffalosjokes.com/20706.htm
That's
all folks
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