YOUR TOP TEN

The top 10 country singles:  
  
1. Dierks Bentley -- Settle For A Slowdown  
2. Kenny Chesney -- Summertime  
3. LeAnn Rimes -- Something's Gotta Give  
4. Phil Vassar -- Last Day Of My Life  
5. Jason Aldean -- Why  
6. Tim McGraw -- When The Stars Go Blue  
7. Brad Paisley -- The World  
8. Carrie Underwood -- Don't Forget To Remember Me  
9. Joe Nichols -- Size Matters (Someday)  
10. Keith Anderson -- Every TIme I Hear Your Name  


The top 10 country albums:  
  
1. Dixie Chicks -- Taking The Long Way  
2. Rascal Flatts -- Me And My Gang  
3. Carrie Underwood -- Some Hearts  
4. The Wreckers -- Stand Still, Look Pretty  
5. Toby Keith -- White Trash With Money  
6. Tim McGraw -- Greatest Hits Vol 2: Reflected  
7. Keith Urban -- Be Here  
8. Alan Jackson -- Precious Memories  
9. Brooks & Dunn -- Hillbilly Deluxe  
10. Johnny Cash -- The Legend Of Johnny Cash  

The top 10 Christian singles:  

1. Casting Crowns -- Praise You In This Storm  
2. Aaron Shust -- My Savior, My God  
3. MercyMe -- So Long Self  
4. Chris Tomlin -- How Great Is Our God  
5. Mark Harris -- Find Your Wings  
6. Kutless -- Strong Tower  
7. Selah -- Bless The Broken Road  
8. Matthew West -- Only Grace  
9. Mark Schultz -- I Am  
10. Brian Littrell -- Welcome Home

Top 10 DVD sales:  
  
1. The Ringer -- FoxVideo  
2. When A Stranger Calls -- Sony Pictures Home Entertainment  
3. Big Momma's House 2 -- FoxVideo  
4. The Producers (Wide Screen) -- Universal Studios Home  
   Video  
5. Nanny McPhee (Wide Screen) -- Universal Studios Home Video  
6. Munich (Wide Screen) -- Universal Studios Home Video  
7. Nanny McPhee (Full Screen) -- Universal Studios Home Video  
8. Doogal -- The Weinstein Company  
9. Something New (Wide Screen) -- Universal Studios Home Video  
10. Grandma's Boy -- FoxVideo  

The top 10 singles:  

1. Chamillionaire Featuring Krayzie Bone -- Ridin'  
2. Daniel Powter -- Bad Day  
3. Nelly Furtado Featuring Timbaland -- Promiscuous  
4. Fort Minor Featuring Holly Brook -- Where'd You Go  
5. Rihanna -- SOS  
6. Cassie -- Me & U  
7. Sean Paul -- Temperature  
8. Lil Jon Featuring E-40 & Sean Paul Of The YoungBloodZ --  
   Snap Yo Fingers  
9. Shakira Featuring Wyclef Jean -- Hips Don't Lie  
10. The Fray -- Over My Head (Cable Car)  

The top 10 albums:  
  
1. Dixie Chicks -- Taking The Long Way  
2. Soundtrack -- High School Musical  
3. Soundtrack -- American Idol Season 5: Encores  
4. Angels And Airwaves -- We Don't Need To Whisper  
5. Red Hot Chili Peppers -- Stadium Arcadium  
6. Rascal Flatts -- Me And My Gang  
7. Don Omar -- King Of Kings  
8. Soundtrack -- WWE: Wreckless Intent  
9. Tool -- 10,000 Days  
10. Carrie Underwood -- Some Hearts  

The top 10 mainstream rock tracks:  
  
1. Red Hot Chili Peppers -- Dani California  
2. Godsmack -- Speak  
3. Tool -- Vicarious  
4. Buckcherry -- Crazy Bitch  
5. Three Days Grace -- Animal I Have Become  
6. Korn -- Coming Undone  
7. Wolfmother -- Woman  
8. Disturbed -- Just Stop  
9. Shinedown -- I Dare You  
10. Mudvayne -- Fall Into Sleep  

****JOKE TIME****

Dumbest Questions Asked By Cruise Passengers:

Does the crew sleep onboard? What time is the midnight buffet? Which elevator takes me to the front of the ship? Do you generate your own electricity? Is this island totally surrounded by water? Is the water in the toilet salt or fresh? What do you do with the ice carvings after they melt? How high above sea level are we?

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A man complained, "Doc, I've been to three other clinics and none of them agreed with your diagnosis."

The doctor calmly replied, "Just wait until the autopsy, then they'll see that I was right."

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It seems like every time our piano tuner John comes to our house, he scolds me for waiting too long between tunings. I agree with him that it should be done every six months, but I don't really think about it until the the piano sounds off-key. The last time he came over I was on the defensive. "If you sent out a postcard reminder like the dentist," I declared, "I would make sure to call you for an appointment in a timely fashion." He looked at me and said, "From now on, when the dentist sends you a postcard, call me."

<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><> In a grocery store a cashier held up a small dairy carton and yelled to a co-worker, "How much is half-and-half?" Without a moment's hesitation the other cashier replied, "One."

<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><> Take a good look at your paycheck stub sometime. There's one area there for what you get and eight different areas for what somebody else gets. They shouldn't even call it "pay;" they should call it leftovers.

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Many patients call the pathology group where I am office manager to discuss their medical bills. One irate woman demanded that I describe every laboratory test on her statement. Reluctantly, I complied. Starting with the first test on her bill, I read, "No. 1, urinalysis." She interrupted me at once. "I'm a what?"

<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><> WARNING, THIS ONE IS A LONG ONE!!!

(These are funny even if you are not a pilot.  Lots of new stuff here)

Aviation 101

Takeoff's are optional.  Landings are mandatory.

If God meant man to fly, He'd have given him more money.

If you push the stick forward, the houses get bigger, if you pull the stick back they get smaller.  (Unless you keep pulling the stick back -then they get bigger again)

Flying is not dangerous; crashing is dangerous.

It's better to be down here wishing you were up there, than up there wishing you were down here.

The propeller is just a big fan in the front of the plane to keep the pilot cool.  Want proof?  Make it stop; then watch the pilot break out into a sweat.

Speed is life, altitude is life insurance.No one has ever collided with the sky.

It's best to keep the pointed end going forward as much as possible.

The only time you have too much fuel is when you're on fire.

Flying is the second greatest thrill known to man.... Landing is the first!

Every one already knows the definition of a 'good' landing is one from which you can walk away.  But very few know the definition of a 'great landing.' It's one after which you can use the airplane another time.

The probability of survival is equal to the angle of arrival.

Always remember you fly an airplane with your head, not your hands. Never let an airplane take you somewhere your brain didn't get to five minutes earlier.

You know you've landed with the wheels up when it takes full power to taxi.

Those who hoot with the owls by night, should not fly with the eagles by day.

A helicopter is a collection of rotating parts going round and round and reciprocating parts going up and down - all of them trying to become random in motion.  Helicopters can't really fly - they're just so ugly that the earth immediately repels them.

Young man, was that a landing or were we shot down?

Learn from the mistakes of others.  You won't live long enough to make all of them yourself.

Trust your captain .... but keep your seat belt securely fastened.

Any pilot who relies on a terminal forecast can be sold the Brooklyn Bridge. If he relies on winds-aloft reports he can be sold Niagara Falls.

Good judgment comes from experience and experience comes from bad judgment.

Aviation is not so much a profession as it is a disease.

There are three simple rules for making a smooth landing: Unfortunately, no one knows what they are.

The only thing worse than a captain who never flew as copilot is a copilot who once was a captain.

Be nice to your first officer, he may be your captain at your next airline.

Any attempt to stretch fuel is guaranteed to increase headwind.

A thunderstorm is never as bad on the inside as it appears on the outside.  It's worse.

Son, I was flying airplanes for a living when you were still in liquid form.

It's easy to make a small fortune in aviation.  You start with a large fortune.

A male pilot is a confused soul who talks about women when he's flying, and about flying when he's with a woman.

A fool and his money are soon flying more airplane than he can handle.

Remember, you're always a student in an airplane.

Keep looking around; there's always something you've missed.

Try to keep the number of your landings equal to the number of your takeoffs.

You cannot propel yourself forward by patting yourself on the back.

There are old pilots, and there are bold pilots, but there are no old, bold, pilots!

Things which do you no good in aviation: Altitude above you. Runway behind you.  Fuel in the truck.  Half a second ago.  Approach plates in the car. The airspeed you don't have.

Flying is the perfect vocation for a man who wants to feel like a boy, but not for one who still is.

Asking what a pilot thinks about the FAA is like asking a fireplug what it thinks about dogs.

Being an airline pilot would be great if you didn't have to go on all those trips.

Gravity never loses!  The best you can hope for is a draw!

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A man has a first appointment with a psychiatrist and when asked why he's there, the fellow responds, "Doctor, I'm tired of being on the outside looking in."

"Well..." responded the doctor, "sounds like we have to try to improve your self-image.  Let's get a few basic facts first. What do you do for a living ?"

"I'm a window washer." responded the patient.

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I'M A SENIOR CITIZEN from: In Honor of Older Americans...Author Unknown

~~I'm the life of the party...even when it lasts 'till 8 pm. ~~I'm very good at opening childproof caps with a hammer. ~~I'm usually interested in going home before I get to where I'm going. ~~I'm good on a trip for at least an hour without my aspirin, antacid.... ~~I'm the first one to find the bathroom wherever I go ~~I'm awake many hours before my body allows me to get up ~~I'm smiling all the time because I can't hear a word you're saying ~~I'm very good at telling stories...over and over and over and over ~~I'm aware that other people's grandchildren are not as bright as mine ~~I'm so cared for: long-term care, eye care, private care, dental care ~~I'm not grouchy, I just don't like traffic, waiting, children, politicians... ~~I'm positive I did housework correctly before my mate retired ~~I'm sure everything I can't find is in a secure place ~~I'm wrinkled, saggy and lumpy, and that's just my left leg ~~I'm having trouble remembering simple words like....uh.... ~~I'm now spending more time with my pillows than with my mate ~~I'm realizing that aging is not for sissies ~~I'm walking more (to the bathroom) and enjoying it less ~~I'm going to reveal what goes on behind the green doors... ~~I'm sure they are making adults much younger these days ~~I'm in the *initial* state of my golden years: SS, CD's, IRA's, AARP ~~I'm wondering if you're only as old as you feel, how could I be alive at 150? ~~I'm anti-everything now: anti-fat, anti-smoke, anti-noise, anti- inflammatory ~~I'm supporting all movements now...by eating bran, prunes and raisins ~~I'm a walking storeroom of facts...I've just lost the storeroom ~~I'm a Senior Citizen and I think I am having the time of my life ~~Do I have Alzeimers? I don't remember.  But, I'm happy, I think.

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AND FINALLY . . . . .

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FOR SALE BY OWNER: Complete set of EncyclopediaBritannica. 45 volumes.. Excellent condition. $1,000.00 or best offer. No longer needed. Got married last month. Freaking Wife knows everything <><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><>