Publisher's Desk...
Good morning. I hope this finds you well, that everyone's plans for the weekend are fulfilled and your weather cooperates. As for us, ours is chilly but beautiful. Of course, being in Texas, that could change in 5 minutes! I'll be working graves so it doesn't really matter if it does. Unless it rains...reminds me of my deep wish that all drivers be required to re-take the driving portion of their state-required drivers license test IN THE RAIN. Man! Wouldn't life be safer!
We have a great issue today, folks. Not only do we have some of the best recipes around, we have some great things to make you think and laugh. What a wonderful way to start a weekend, right? An extra hug goes out to Linda in California for the funnies in today's Crazy Corner. You go, girl!
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Enjoy!
Ramblings...
COWBOY POETRY
Jake, the rancher, went one day to fix a distant fence.
The wind was cold and gusty and the clouds rolled gray and dense.
As he pounded the last staples in and gathered tools to go,
The temperature had fallen, the wind and snow began to blow.
When he finally reached his pickup, he felt a heavy heart.
From the sound of that ignition, he knew it wouldn't start.
So Jake did what most of us would do if we had been there.
He humbly bowed his balding head and sent aloft a prayer.
As he turned the key for the last time, he softly cursed his luck.
They found him three days later, frozen stiff in that old truck.
Now Jake had been around in life and done his share of roaming.
But when he saw Heaven, he was shocked -- it looked just like Wyoming!
Of all the saints in Heaven, his favorite was St. Peter.
(Now, this line ain't needed but it helps with rhyme and meter)
So they set and talked a minute or two, or maybe it was three.
Nobody was keeping' score -- in Heaven time is free.
"I've always heard," Jake said to Pete, "that God will answer prayer,
But one time I asked for help, well, he just plain wasn't there."
"Does God answer prayers of some, and ignore the prayers of others?
That don't seem exactly square -- I know all men are brothers."
"Or does he randomly reply, without good rhyme or reason?
Maybe, it's the time of day, the weather or the season."
"Now I ain't trying to act smart, it's just the way I feel.
And I was wondering', could you tell me -- what the heck's the deal?!"
Peter listened very patiently and when Jake was done,
There were smiles of recognition,and he said, "So, you're the one!!"
"That day your truck, it wouldn't start, and you sent your prayer a flying,
You gave us all a real bad time, with hundreds of us trying."
"A thousand angels rushed, to check the status of your file,
But you know, Jake, we hadn't heard from you in quite a long while."
"And though all prayers are answered, and God ain't got no quota,
He didn't recognize your voice, and started a truck in Minnesota."
BETTER KEEP IN TOUCH!
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Did You Know?...
What's UP?
Shared by Bette, Pittsburg, CA
The Word "UP". This is a fascinating thought process and for you people who like to "play with words" you'll love this.
UP Did you ever think about this???? There is a two-letter word that perhaps has more meaning than any other two-letter word, and that is "UP".
It's easy to understand UP, meaning toward the sky or at the top of the list, but when we waken in the morning, why do we wake UP?
At a meeting, why does a topic come UP? Why do we speak UP and why are the officers UP for election and why is it UP to the secretary to write UP a report?
We call UP our friends, we use it to brighten UP a room, polish UP the silver, we warm UP the leftovers and clean UP the kitchen. We lock UP the house and some guys fix UP the old car.
At other times the little word has real special meaning.
People stir UP trouble, line UP for tickets, work UP an appetite, and think UP excuses.
To be dressed is one thing but to be dressed UP is special.
And this is confusing:
A drain must be opened UP because it is stopped UP. We open UP a store in the morning but we close it UP at night. We seem to be pretty mixed UP about UP.
To be knowledgeable of the proper uses of UP, look UP the word in the dictionary. In a desk size dictionary, UP takes UP almost 1/4th the page and definitions add UP to about thirty.
If you are UP to it, you might try building UP a list of the many ways UP is used. It will take UP a lot of your time, but if you don't give UP, you may wind UP with a hundred or more.
When it threatens to rain, we say it is clouding UP. When the sun comes out we say it is clearing UP. When it rains, it wets UP the earth. When it doesn't rain for awhile, things dry UP.
One could go on and on, but I'll wrap it UP, for now my time is UP, so I'll shut UP.....
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Discussion Forum
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Next Monthly Theme...
Theme To Be Announced on Monday, March 1st
A to Z Recipes continues with its popular Theme Issues. We will share theme recipes and post them on the first Sunday of each month. Send your recipes no later than the last Friday of each month to have them posted in the next monthly theme issue. You may send in TWO of your favorite theme recipes in ONE email. If the number of recipes exceeds those needed in the issue, the publisher will post as many from every submitter as possible and save the remaining recipes for the following Sundays of that month. The rules for recipe submissions for the monthly theme issues are the same as ALL recipes submitted for posting.
The rules are as follows:
As a service to your fellow readers, please send only recipes that are in a form that others could easily copy and save for their own use. Recipes that would require a lot of editing or cleaning up or use non-standard measurements should not be submitted. Recipes without a name and location of sender may NOT be posted or posted without any credit given. There will be NO recipes posted that are from other recipe-zines. A to Z Recipes protects the privacy of its readers and does NOT publish email addresses. There will be no exceptions.
The deadline for April's theme issue is Friday, March 26th.
Theme recipes must have subject: "Theme subject" (to be announced) and will be posted on Sunday, April 3rd.
As usual, only recipes are to be sent to: A to Z Recipes Inbox
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Crazy Corner...
Medical School
Shared by Linda, CA
A professor is giving the first year medical students their first lecture on autopsies, and decides to give them a few basics before starting. "You must be capable of two things to do an autopsy. The first thing is that you must have no sense of fear." At this point, the lecturer sticks his finger into the dead man's anus, and then licks it. He asks all the students to do the same thing with the corpses in front of them. After a couple of minutes silence, they follow suit.
"The second thing is that you must have an acute sense of observation: I stuck my middle finger into the corpse's anus, but I licked my index."
(Maggie says "Yuck!")
An Oldie But A Goodie
Shared by Linda, CA
A woman walks into a pharmacy, strolls over to the counter, and catches the pharmacist's attention.
"Can I please get some arsenic?" she asks.
"Arsenic? What do you want arsenic for?", asks the pharmacist.
"It's for my husband," she replies.
"You husband?" exclaims the pharmacist, "I hope you don't mean what I think you mean!"
She just nods.
"Well, lady," he replies, "I'm an honest man. I can't sell you arsenic, I wouldn't if I could, and I don't know what made you think you could just stroll into a respectable store and expect me to sell you arsenic!"
She doesn't say a word. She just reaches into her purse, fishes out a photograph, and hands it across the counter. It is a picture of her husband, in bed with the pharmacist's wife.
Slowly the pharmacist looks up, over the counter, and then straight at her. "Lady," he says, "Why didn't you tell me you had a prescription?"
Government Worker
Shared by Linda, CA
A State Government Employee sits in his
office and out of boredom,
decides to see what's in his old filing
cabinet. He pokes through the
contents and comes across an old brass lamp.
"This will look nice on my mantelpiece," he
decides, and takes it home with him. While
polishing the lamp, a genie appears and grants
him three wishes. "I wish for an ice cold diet
Pepsi right now!" He gets his Pepsi and drinks it.
Now that he can think more clearly, he states
his second wish.
"I wish to be on an island where beautiful
nymphomaniacs reside."
Suddenly he is on an island with gorgeous
females eyeing him lustfully.
He tells the genie his third and last wish:
"I wish I'd never have to work ever again."
POOF!
He's back in his government office.
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Your Favorites...
NEW ENGLAND RISOTTO
~Submitted by Rita, London, England
Ingredients:
1 small onion, diced
1 stalk celery, chopped
1 small apple, chopped (about 1 cup)
1 1/2 tablespoons butter
1 cup Arborio rice
4 cups water
3 tablespoons dry onion soup mix
1 1/2 teaspoons ground rubbed sage
Black pepper
2/3 cup smoked Edam cheese or other smoked cheese, grated
Saut?© onion, celery, and apple in a little water and butter until soft.
Add rice and stir. Begin adding water 1 cup at a time. Add dry
onion soup mix, sage, and pepper to taste. Cook over medium
heat, stirring often, adding more water as it is absorbed, until the
rice reaches the desired consistency.
Risotto requires constant attention during the cooking process.
When the rice is done, stir in cheese until it melts. Serve hot.
LINGUINI ALFREDO FOR GOURMETS
(Microwave)
~Submitted by Larry Holmes, Ontario, Canada
2 tablespoons butter
3 tablespoons onion, chopped finely
1 carrot, grated
12 large mushrooms, sliced
dash paprika
few drops lemon juice
pepper, to taste
1 pound linguini, cooked
1/3 cup heavy cream
3 tablespoons freshly chopped parsley
?? cup grated Parmesan cheese
In a microwave dish, place butter, onion, carrot, mushrooms, paprika and
lemon juice, and pepper to taste. Cover with plastic wrap, cook at HIGH 4
to 5 minutes.
Pour hot water over pasta, drain and mix with vegetables. Add cream,
parsley and cheese. Cook, uncovered, at medium (50%) 23 minutes.
Place on plates and serve immediately.
Hint: Before serving, add a few drops of white wine to cream mixture.
Makes 4 servings.
PLUM UPSIDE DOWN CAKE
~Submitted by Jessica, Corfu, Greece
1/2 c. margarine
1/2 c. packed brown sugar
2 c. plum slices
2/3 c. granulated sugar
1 egg
1/2 tsp. vanilla
1 1/2 c. flour
2 tsp. baking powder
1/4 tsp. salt
2/3 c. milk
Reserve 1/3 cup margarine. Melt remaining margarine
in 9 inch baking pan. Sprinkle brown sugar over medium
margarine. Arrange plums in pan. Beat reserved
margarine and sugar until light and fluffy. Blend in
egg and vanilla. Add combined dry ingredients
alternately with milk, mixing well after each addition.
Carefully spread batter over plums. Bake at 350
degrees for 40-45 minutes or until toothpick comes out
clean. Immediately invert on platter. Serve warm with
whipped cream.
CHICKEN STIR-FRY
~Submitted by Carol, No. CA
1 lb. boneless, skinless chicken breasts, cut into strips
2 T oil
1 clove garlic, crushed
1T fresh ginger
3 c fresh vegetables
Sauce:
1/4 c lemonade concentrate
1/4 c soy sauce
1/4 c water
2 t sugar
1T vinegar
1T cornstarch
Prepare sauce, set aside.
Heat oil, add chicken, garlic, and ginger.
Stir fry till chicken is cooked. Add vegetables, stir fry. Add sauce and
stir till thickened.
4 servings
BROCCOLI AND CHEDDAR SOUP
~Submitted by Tena, MO
2 heads broccoli, coarsely chopped (about 5 cups)
4 cups chicken stock
2 cups heavy cream
2 bay leaves
1 ?? cups ale
1 cup grated sharp Cheddar
Tabasco to taste
Simmer broccoli in stock, covered pratically for 20 minutes, or until it is tender. In a blender or food processor puree the mixture in batches and return to pan. In a saucepan, scald the cream with the bay leaves, add the ale in a slow stream and bring mixture to a simmer. Add the cheese a little at a time, stirring, until melted. Add cheddar mixture to broccoli mixture, and heat over low heat until it is just heated through, but do not let boil. Season with Tabasco, salt and pepper to taste.
Serves 8.
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Heart Healthy...
LO-CARB CREAMY CAULIFLOWER DIJON
Portions: 5-6
~Submitted by Treva, NC
1 medium head of Cauliflower
1/4 cup diced onion
1/2 cup diced celery
3 cups water
6 chicken bullion cubes
1 cup water
1 packet Splenda
1 cup heavy cream
1 cup shredded sharp cheddar
2 tablespoons of dijonaise mustard
4 teaspoons dill flakes
1 tablespoon "Thick N Thin" or 3 tablespoons flour
1. Break Cauliflower into small florets, dice onion and cook in 3 cups of water and chicken base.
2. In another sauce pan, on low heat combine 1 cup water, 1 cup heavy cream, cheese, mustard and dill.
3. When Cheese melts add ?? cup of chicken base and flour or "TNT" to make a roux.
4. Add roux to cream sauce and cream sauce to cauliflower.
5. Stir season to taste with salt and fresh ground pepper.
6. Simmer 30 minutes
Comments:
Thick N Thin is available in low carb sections of health food stores and is a no carb thickener. Great for lo-carb soups or gravies.
Note: This recipe did not have the nutrient values.
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For Two...
HEAVENLY SNAPPER
This fish recipes guarantees a moist and flavorful entree.
2 8-ounce Red Snapper fillets
1/4 cup Hellmann's mayonnaise
1/4 cup softened butter
1/2 cup Parmesan cheese
3 tablespoons green onion, chopped
3 dashes Tabasco
Place the fish in a lightly buttered baking dish with skin side down. Bake at 425 for 12 to 15 minutes per inch of thickness.
Mix all of the remaining ingredients together. When done (check center of fish) spread mixture over top of fish. Broils until top is brown and bubbly.
Yield: 2 servings
Note: I believe I got this recipe off the Hellmann's site...not sure.
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Publisher's Choice...
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PEPPER-APRICOT GLAZED CORNED BEEF
Total preparation and cooking time: 2-3/4 to 3-3/4 hours
2-1/2 to 3-1/2 -pound boneless corned beef brisket
Glaze:
1/4 cup apricot preserves
1 tablespoon red wine vinegar
1 clove garlic, minced
1/4 teaspoon coarse grind black pepper
1. Place corned beef brisket in Dutch oven; add water to cover. Bring just to a simmer; do not boil. Cover tightly and simmer 2-1/2 to 3-1/2 hours or until fork-tender.
2. Combine glaze ingredients in 1-cup glass measure. Microwave on HIGH 2 to 3 minutes, stirring once.
3. Remove brisket from water; trim fat. Place on rack in broiler pan so surface of beef is 3 to 4 inches from heat. Brush top of brisket with glaze; broil 2 to 3 minutes or until glazed. Carve diagonally across the grain.
Makes 6 to 8 servings.
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