I mentioned it a number of times that it is difficult for me
to talk about love - first, because there is a great number
of erroneous ideas concerning love in people's minds; second,
because those people cherish such ideas, not willing to let
them go even in the face of truth.
We may start with one of the greatest statements of the Bible:
"God is love". This means that love - just like God - is
universally present and available. It should not be "found".
It cannot ever be "lost". It is impossible for love to die.
Even more, it cannot be partial or possessive. Partiality
and possessiveness spring forth from a sense of lack. But
there is no lack of love in our world; there is only lack
of awareness.
Speaking on love, most of people refer to romantic feelings
and affection. I have no intention to put down such ideas,
judging them as "unspiritual" or "imperfect". Love is the
power of attraction, and it operates in all cases where
different individuals are drawn together, including sexual
attraction. Problems arise only when we begin to think that
it is the only kind of love there is, not being able to see
universal implications of its principle.
Since God is love and the world proceeds from God, our universe
has to be a creation of love. Love is its supreme law.
We cannot understand the world without taking love into
the account. We cannot live successfully in the world without
giving and receiving of love. Once we realize that love is
the nature of all things, that its essence is the universal
oneness, it won't be difficult for us to express love.
In the gospel of Thomas we see a beautiful description of
this oneness:
"Jesus said to them, "When you make the two into one, and
when you make the inner like the outer and the outer like
the inner, and the upper like the lower, and when you make
male and female into a single one, so that the male will
not be male and the female be female... then you will enter
the kingdom".
"To make the two into one" means to see the two as one. We
don't make up this oneness, we realize it in the process
of our spiritual unfoldnent. Then, we life from this oneness.
In doing so, we become truly loving, since we display no
partiality. As Kahlil Gibran wisely said,
"Love gives naught but itself and takes naught but from itself.
Love possesses not nor would it be possessed;
For love is sufficient unto love".
We cannot claim exclusive rights on our object of love.
There is a spiritual paradox which most people don't
recognize: whatever we want to control, flees from us.
Whatever we want to possess, disappears; for freedom is
the essential ingredient of love. Without mutual freedom,
love turns into co-dependant relationships.
No person is comfortable being a slave. If someone says that
he or she is happy to be dependant on another, these are not
his or her deepest feelings, but superficial rationalizations.
Desire for bondage proceeds from insecurity. It is strange
that so often we hope to find security in close relationships,
which in fact make us even more insecure. Why? Because we
didn't make sufficient efforts to know ourselves and to
develop healthy self-trust. Self-trusting individuals are
not compelled to "complete" themselves through others.
They are whole and integrated personalities the way they are.
(to be continued)
