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Sunday, Nov 16 2003
Self-Positivity! ezine
(HTML edition)
Your Self-Esteem ezine from Crystal Woods
http://www.self-positivity.com
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Contents
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Welcome & What's New!
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Hello. Coming at you from a nice relaxed place this month, as I spend my 2 weeks off clearing up some stuff
that's been hanging over me, and planning how I want my apartment to look. (I'm working on redecorating as well
as getting some financial affairs in order) In any case, I'm thoroughly enjoying the fact that I'm accomplishing
stuff for ME with my time, rather than for someone else - even if I do love my job it's still a nice feeling to
own your own time again temporarily. This month's issue is a bit early for that reason, and I'm releasing it as
I get ready to celebrate my mother's 60th birthday. Happy Birthday, Lyla! This one's for you.
I've found a couple of nice designs for the website rework (most promising is a butterfly motif), and am going
through testing them as well as working out how and what I'll be incorporating - so I'm not just redecorating on
the home front! Life is still treating me really well for which I'm abundantly grateful, and as you'll see from
the articles below it's given me plenty of scope for pondering the nature of things - as well as where I'd like
them to go! Hope you enjoy.... |
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Article: Goals alone won't get you there
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It's coming up to 15 years now that I've spent reading, doing courses, and otherwise pursuing self-development.
That's a long time. Long enough to hear the core concepts repeated over and over again, and to be at the point
where there's very little "new" to surprise me. But I still keep reading, attending courses, working
through workbooks, listening to CD's, cassettes and the like. Why? Because I'm still working to "get there"
- there being where I want to be. Aka my goal. I know what it is, I have it written down, I visualise it regularly
but the refreshers I put myself through are what remind me that just knowing where I want to go isn't enough.
What IS enough then? Well, I'm not personally qualified, since I'm not there yet. In fact, I don't believe I'll
ever consider myself "there" because it's my determination that as I reach one goal my next step will
be to sit, savour it for a bit, and promptly set the next one. For me it's meant to be more about the journey than
the destination, and it's important not to stray off the path or wander off down attractive looking side alleys
too. Hence this article.
In a nutshell, the things that come up again and again through all the books, courses, tapes and seminars are Goals,
Values, and Persistence. They're the linchpins to success that everyone tells you about. Mentioned a lot less often,
but crucial to avoiding those stones and side paths I mentioned, are 2 additional items - Plans and Priorities.
I'm earning money now. There's a lot of lovely things I want to accomplish with it, some of which I'm already doing,
or close to achieving. That's a nice feeling, but there's plenty more that I want, and a few items that come close
to need (the ones that tie in to my ultimate goal). Do I know what they are? Not all of them - I've only just realised
that this was an issue. I'm not used to having so many goals within reach at the same time.
While I was working hard on getting a job, I knew how many applications I had to send out each week, how long to
wait for follow up and the like. Then, once I got it my priority was getting my debt under control, paying it off
as much as I could, and consolidating as soon as I'd be able to get approval to do it. I've achieved both of those
goals now, but as I mentioned before, this is the point where I need to re-evaluate what my next top-priority goal
is going to be. Not my long term one, that's not changed, but the medium and short term ones that come between
here and there. I somehow missed the fact that I HAD reached the goalposts in front of me and needed to re-evaluate.
Savouring time has given way to the confusion and that showed me I was drifting a bit. Now I knuckle back down
again and plan the next bit.
Without having listed the things I want to accomplish with my newfound (relatively) income, I've been having a
great time, floating around in my mind all the things I want (redecorate, save x amount for emergencies, do x course
etc), and the things that popped up in front of me were the ones that got taken care of. I'd find a piece of furniture
that matched what I wanted to do in one room on sale somewhere, OK, I'd take action and buy it. I'd get something
in the mail inviting me to do the course I'd been thinking of - Yup, thanks, can do that now - I'd fill out the
form and get onto it. Whatever was in my face was getting done, but the rest - the stuff needing me to save or
plan and work towards it - got left behind, and was getting further behind as I committed to more and more. You
can see where I'm going, I hope. I had my goals, but I hadn't planned what steps each of them needed. Most of all,
I hadn't prioritised them and didn't know what was the biggest thing I wanted to get to next.
I've got the next 2 weeks to myself, and intend getting a lot of things together on the home front, but some of
my plans are now going to take a back step as they get beaten out by things higher on the priority list. Yes, it
would be nice to accomplish it all now (who knows, if Lotto draws the right numbers, I may get to ;-) - but at
least if I've got them planned out, I can know that they're not forgotten, and I'll achieve them eventually without
having to worry that I've forgotten or delayed something more important in the meanwhile. I think I like that approach
better.
On the home, personal development front, it's also led me to the realisation that sometimes re-reading books or
replaying CD's can pay off more than going out and buying the next lot. Besides that, although it may also have
something to do with the fact that I'm planning to build the shelving I want in the back room because I've
not been able to find it anywhere, but I'm finding it's getting easier and easier to walk past book sale tables
without stopping to buy...
Best Wishes
Crystal |
| Thoughts to Ponder - How Technology is changing our Social
Structures too |
There's no denying technology is changing our world. You may believe it's for the better, or for the worse,
but I don't believe that change in and of itself IS better or worse, only our reactions make it so. Thinking on
the ways in which the way my life, and the lives around me have changed I thought it was very ironic that it's
both made our world smaller, and at the same time broadened the horizons beyond anything we could have imagined.
Take knowledge, for example. What someone needed to know, let alone what they could potentially learn, say a hundred
years ago, is probably about the equivalent of what a child goes through up to grade 4 today. Not only that, but
because there is so much information and knowledge developed in our society, no one person can gain a broad grasp
(generalists are becoming a rare breed), so interests get developed early. Once upon a time, someone with a particular
interest would have been exposed to a range of people with very different perspectives through living in their
local community, but our communities now are not geographical - they are social, so you connect in to the people
who share the same interests as you.
You can see it happening. Where people used to identify themselves as belonging to a certain tribe, then to a
location, now the first thing you get asked is what your occupation is - what job group do you belong to, in other
words. You are identified not just by your name, but by your speciality immediately. As traditional jobs become
more scarce, even those who don't have them need to identify what job they normally perform - "I'm a _____,
although I'm not working for anybody in particular at the moment". If you're unemployed and not part of any
particular organisation, you are categorised as not belonging. Anywhere. (That's personal experience speaking.)
It's the new form of social grouping.
Ponder the consequences. Most new knowledge comes from cross-fertilisation of more than one area of expertise.
Yes many people do develop more than one line of interest, and so enrich their community, but as these communities
get tighter, and splinter languages develop, are we possibly going to see the emergence of divisions as strong
as the racial divisions were in our previously geographically limited society? If you know a lot about chemistry,
for example, do you consider as equals people who havent even heard of the periodic table, let alone socialise
with them?
Isolation is one of the major by-products of our technological age, as physical location and distance loses it's
meaning. My own family is scattered across 4 corners of the globe. I've known for many years that the internet
allows a means of overcoming this, connecting with people regardless of where they are, to form communities independent
of geography, based on common interests, but is this a good thing, or could it contain the seeds to splinter our
society further, isolating us from those around us we don't choose or need to identify with? What other consequences
could this new social ordering bring?
Only the future will tell. |
In closing
Please feel free to forward this to your friends, or if you'd like permission to reprint any of the above contact
me directly at articles@self-positivity.com - no charge involved,
but my details must also be attached.
All the best, hope to catch you next time!
Crystal
http://www.self-positivity.com |
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