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Thursday, May 2, 2002
Self-Positivity! ezine
(HTML edition)
Your Self-Esteem
ezine from Crystal Woods
http://www.self-positivity.com
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Contents
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Welcome!
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Hello again. This is the first issue using the brand new service I found to host the list, and my apologies
for all the hassles with delivery while I was searching. As a bonus, you can now choose to subscribe either HTML
or text, without all the fiddling with second & third lists that happened last year. I'm thrilled to have
found it, but I'd still love to get any/all feedback on how the service measures up as well, since sending it out
you only see one side of the story. |
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Auctions
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What's New
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No auctions this month, since I've kinda got enough on my plate with the redesign etc etc. I have discovered some
really cool software for managing auctions, tho.
Check out the free trial download at www.foodogsoftware.com |
The site is currently going through a redesign. As I mention on it, seems like every time my life gets redesigned
the look you get changes, but anyway ;-) Yes, that means there's been some major progress on the home front.
I'm in a job and clearing out some of my old debts, and along with that seem to be clearing out old emotional stuff
as well. I'm even sorting through my paperwork, miracle of miracles! I've put myself down for volunteer work,
and am now finally meeting some wonderful people who share a positive outlook on life & a determination to
grab hold of it. The value of being surrounded by that just can't be underestimated, which is why I chose the
topic for this month's article, on how the people surrounding you tend to reflect a lot about yourself, if you
look a bit deeper than the surface. Hope you enjoy! |
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Featured
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Article: The Mirrors Around You
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Rhythm
© Crystal Woods 1997
Rhythm rules our lives
an undercurrent just below the surface
pulsing out our waking, sleeping selves
force of habit
regulation into cycles
or activity and restufulness
unheard music to which our feet
feel compelled to dance
without volition
and mostly without recognition-
until the rhythm falters
Thrown out of synch, we flail
reaching out as though about to drown
sleepless, anxious, sesnsing something wrong
feeling deep the lack of pattern in our lives,
desperation for its orderly return
so we can step in rhythm once again
and feel the rightness of our world
interacting with our lives
in the intricate steps of The Dance,
choreographed in unconsciousness
but pervasive, none the same
We move within the Flow,
and feel ourselves a part of a greater whole
Comforted by the heartbeats of our mother, Nature
and our father, Time.
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I've believed for years that the things that annoy you most about other people are the things you dont want
to look at in yourself. I've made it a habit to stop when I find myself getting irritated, and double check if
it's really so annoying in itself, or if it's rubbing me up the wrong way because it's something I need to look
at personally. Usually, I've got to admit, it's been a sharp pointer to something in me, not something in the
other person (not always, but often enough!).
Recently, I discovered a new aspect of this. I've just started a new job, and taken up the challenge of reinventing
myself once more. I've put a lot more emphasis on community work, and despite a number of challenges, worked hard
to keep the positive outlook I took so many years to develop. Finally, it seems to be taking effect. You'll see
a lot of books out there on metaphysical topics that go on about how our thoughts create the world around us -
well, it's actually made changes in the people surrounding me purely through working on myself, and doing nothing
different to try to meet new people or break ties with old connections. There's one friend that has been in a
downward spiral for a few years now, and while I've done all I can to help her, she's almost seemed determined
to move back into a 'victim' role. It's been disheartening for me, but more, it's been a drain. Those kind of
people, lets face it, take energy from you and dont give anything back. This year, shortly after I started working
again, she decided to pack up & move to the other end of the state, to stay with her ex-husband and 'look after'
him. She's gone on to me at length about how she's sure it will end up with her doing everything, him using all
her money etc etc, so she is not going into it blindfold, but she was determined to go do it. What do you do in
that situation? There's a certain point beyond which you can say all you like, but you're only going to convince
someone even more strongly to do what they want to do anyway. I reached that point, and had to let go for her
to make her own choices. She's now gone.
On the other hand, some of the people I'm now surrounded with at work, and in the community, have been an absolute
joy to come across. Interestingly enough, I'm meeting people who seem to take it for granted that they have a
right to success, which helps me keep hold of my belief that I can do it too. (Wouldn't you know that most of
them would be guys! I don't know if it's the kind of women I know, or something bigger, but I dont seem to meet
many women with that level of self-confidence & belief) I'm meeting people that I can have fascinating conversations
with, on society, on personal issues, on just about anything at all, and it's wonderful. I've finally got the
kind of friendship circle I said last year I wanted to build, except that I haven't done any building! Not on
anyone else - in any event.
I'm starting to think that maybe I have done something, though. Not on the obvious level of going out & looking
for people, but drawing on the old saying "birds of a feather flock together". I've changed my plumage,
and now the crowd around me seems to reflect the changes I've made on my own self-image. It's a humbling thought
- mostly because it means that while I had so much trouble finding them it wasn't a lack of positive people in
my home town at all... It was nothing more or less than the niggling doubts I had in my own heart.
With this in mind, I'm going to keep a close eye on how my circle of friendship changes from here on in, both as
evidence that the changes I've made are real & lasting, and also to show me the things I've not yet ferreted
out about my own thought & belief patterns. While the people I'm around now are definitely heaps more positive
and success oriented, most of them share a common theme around the fact that they are all WORKING towards success,
not having already got there. I can use that to make sure I create a more immediate picture of my goals as already
reached in my life - but here's the challenge to you this month: What do your friends say about where you are??? |
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