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Sitting at my computer, I pondered how
to answer a letter from a bitter man; bitter because he
refused to let go of an attitude that was robbing him of the
joy of living.
Wronged by a member of his family many
years earlier, this angry writer had composed a blistering
letter to the relative he felt had contributed to a family
breakup from which he had never recovered. Now he had sent a
copy of this letter for me to read before mailing it to his
supposed enemy.
He wrote well.
But the content of his letter revealed
the identity of his real enemy: himself. He refused to
forgive the one he blamed for his problems and this had been
perpetuating his misery for years. In spite of efforts I had
made in the past to help this bitter man break free from
anger, he had kept coddling his contentiousness and as a
result his emotional wounds refused to heal.
Millions, like my cold correspondent,
move through life shackled to their sulking because they are
unwilling to forgive.
How can we forgive those who’ve wronged
us deeply?
Here’s a more difficult question to
answer: How can we keep on forgiving when the offense is
repeated again and again?
Peter once came to Jesus and asked how
many times he should forgive one who had offended him. Seven
times seemed sufficient to Peter, but his Lord told him to
multiply that number by seventy, calling for His questioning
disciple to forgive 490 times. Actually, Peter was being
taught to just keep on forgiving. One who has forgiven 490
times has developed a healthy habit of living in a forgiving
way.
Following this challenging lesson on
forgiveness, Peter was told about a king who discovered one
of his trusted servants had borrowed heavily from the royal
coffers and owed him a large amount of money. Since the
servant couldn’t pay what he owed, the king ordered that his
family be sold into slavery and the money applied to his
huge outstanding debt. Later, however, the king had a change
of heart and forgave the servant, canceling his entire
obligation.
Upon being forgiven, the ungrateful
servant found one of his friends who owed him a small amount
of money (about fifteen dollars) and threatened to have him
thrown into prison if he didn’t pay up immediately (Matthew
18:23-25).
This parable teaches the first
principle of forgiveness: we must forgive because we have
been forgiven. But another important dimension to the lesson
is added: we have never been wronged to the extent that we
have wronged God. Since He offers to forgive us, we are
obligated to do the same for others.
“I can never forgive her,” said an
angry man, after his wife had disappointed him.
“No, you can’t,” I replied, “unless you
are willing to forgive as you have been forgiven.”
A free flow of forgiveness would revive
most churches and revitalize many marriages.
Barriers erected long ago would
fall. Warm embraces would replace cold stares.
Nursing an old wound grieves God and
barricades His blessings.
Let it go!
(c) 2006 Roger Campbell
All Rights Reserved |
