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“I’ll get even with you!”
We’ve all heard these five
wounding words and some of us have spoken them,
not really being aware of their destructive power
or the negative influence they can have on both
the speaker and hearer. This seething desire for
retribution can sentence one to the prison of
anger; the cell of recurring rage; where revenge
is the jailor and release from selfishness is the
only key to freedom.
The desire to get even
creates playground bullies, workplace tyrants and
miserable marriages. Those who are angry because
they feel life hasn’t been fair can expect their
misery to continue until they shed the “get even”
complex. But how can those enslaved by
selfishness break free from the desire to get
their due from all who owe them?
Freedom begins with
forgiveness.
R.T. Kendall, author of the
best-selling book, “Total Forgiveness,” posts this
freeing statement on the title page: “When
everything in you wants to hold a grudge, point a
finger and remember the pain, God wants you to lay
it all aside.”
Kendall adds that God can
enable us to forgive no matter how deeply we’ve
been wounded by another person, even one we have
trouble liking. In his words: “Totally forgiving
someone doesn’t necessarily mean we will want to
spend our vacation with them, but it does mean
that we release the bitterness in our hearts
concerning what they have done.”
We’re now entering the season
when forgiveness becomes easier to understand.
The cross reveals our Lord to be the figure of
forgiveness. In spite of all the pain He endured
during the crucifixion, He was able to forgive
those who had falsely accused Him. His first
words from the cross, “Father, forgive them,”
should challenge all who feel they’ve been cheated
in some way and must get even.
Entering the store of a man
of faith, I asked how he was doing.
“Better than I deserve,” he
replied.
And he could have spoken for
us all. Not one of us is worthy of God’s love or
His many blessings, yet He loves us and showers us
with far more than we deserve. Shouldn’t we do
the same for others?
A man once came to the noted
devotional speaker, F.B. Meyer, saying he had lost
the joy of living. He then explained that his
misery had begun when his brother had treated him
unfairly at the death of their father, bringing a
breach between them over their inheritance. At
that time, he had vowed he would never forgive his
brother.
Now the brother was going
through many trials. His wife and child had died
and he was seriously ill. The joyless man wanted
to go to his brother and make peace with him but
had declared he would never do so.
“It is better to break a bad
vow than to keep it,” said Meyer, urging the
troubled man to go to his brother and be
reconciled to him while he had time.
“He went and the smile of God
went with him,” wrote Meyer.
Who waits for your
forgiveness? What barriers now exist between you
and another person that ought to be broken down?
To whom should you go offering reconciliation
instead of seeking revenge? Go! And you will not
go alone.
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