|
Hearts and Humor Archives Index
|
Subscribe
|
|
| << July20, 2006 - Hearts and Humor - Tippy |
July28, 2006 - Hearts and Humor - Bucket Full of Holes >> |
|
WARNING!!!!!!!!!! TODAY'S STORY WAS WRITTEN FOR A CONTEST. I USE WORDS AND TOPICS THAT MAY OFFEND SOME OF YOU. IF YOU ARE SENSITIVE TO THESE THINGS, PLEASE DO NOT READ TODAY'S STORY. RETURN ON WEDNESDAY. Hi, Gang! What a weekend Ginny and I had. The grandkids have left to be with their dad. We needed a break. Ginny and I went to a love nest Friday night. There is a hotel close to where I work that has suites only. Every room has a whirlpool for two, a fireplace, and everything. Ginny and I got a honeymoon suite. I got there first. Ginny's daughter brought Ginny from home. I opened the door and my jaw dropped. I walked down four steps to the first level, where the sunk-in whirlpool tub and fireplace were. I took two more steps down to where the 16 foot vanity, TV and bathroom were. I stumbled down another an unseen step I couldn't find the light switch)and there was a heart shaped bed surrounded on three sides and the ceiling with mirrors. It was awesome Ginny got there a few minutes later. We had a drink, went to Red Lobster for dinner and back to our love nest. The rest you'll have to use your imagination for. I urge all of you to take a night away like Ginny and I did. It refreshes the relationship. The rooms we were in are made for couples in love. We left our computers home. We were forced to focus on each other - not that we needed to be forced. Now for today's story. Those of you who have been with me for awhile know, every three months I compete in a writing contest. Ginny and I got home at 2 PM. I rushed to my computer and got my topic and word length. I thought about what to write all afternoon. I was BBQ'ing when my ideas finally came together. I was up until 4 AM finishing it up. At 9 AM I was up, did a quick rewrite, and then we headed into Manhattan. My old friend and boss from Canada was in town. Ginny and I gave them a tour of the city. Now for today's story. First, here is the topic and word count I had to work with. TODAY'S TOPIC! The group of four tipsy teenagers were playing yet another loud game of Mixin' Fixion in the back of the commuter bus. After her contribution, the youngest girl turned her face toward the breeze coming through the window, enjoying the canopy of trees along the country road. Up ahead, she noticed a man flagging down the bus while slinging a large black bag over his shoulder. As he stepped onto the bus, he turned his head toward the bag, slapped it, and yelled, "... ~~~~~ WORD COUNT Stories for today's topic must not exceed 1050 words. Here is what I came up with. The Game Evelyn held Chris' hand and looked at Justin and Lisa kissing. They sat on the school steps. Evelyn liked Chris. He was nice enough, but Justin was hot. She envied his relationship with Lisa. They'd spent the night on the beach drinking beer with their friends and were still half drunk. "Sambro is so stupid!" Evelyn said. Lisa and Justin's lips parted long enough for Lisa to moan, "I like it here." "You would!" Evelyn quipped. Lisa and Justin's lips collided again. "Why do you think it's stupid, Lisa?" Chris asked. "It just is! We have, what, maybe five hundred people here? All they do is fish. There's nothing for us to do. The kids in Halifax have lots to do. We just hang out on these damn steps and waste time. I hate it!" "We could go swim in the brook," Chris suggested. "It's dark. We could skinny-dip." he smirked. "Cool!" Lisa moaned. "I'm tired of the brook!" Evelyn said. "What do you want to do?" Chris asked. Evelyn sighed. "I don't know." The sound of rusty brakes caught their attention. The bus to Halifax pulled up. "We could go to Halifax," Evelyn suggested. Justin and Lisa unlocked lips long enough to say, "That sounds like fun. We could go to the mall." They climbed into the bus and rushed to the back seats. Justin and Lisa locked lips again. Evelyn stared at them in disgust and jealousy. She wanted to be in Lisa's place. "Lisa is such a slut!" she thought to herself. "Hey!" Chris yelled out. "Let's play 'Mixin' Fixion!'" Justin and Lisa unlocked lips. It reminded Evelyn of pulling a vacuum hose from a basketball. "What's that?" Lisa asked. Her lips blue from lack of oxygen. "It's where we take turns building a story." Chris replied. "Someone starts with a paragraph. The next person adds to it. It'll be fun. We have an hour before we get to Halifax. It'll kill time, if you two can keep your faces apart long enough to talk." "That sounds like fun." Justin said. Lisa gave Chris a look that could kill a rhino. "It sounds boring to me." She obviously wanted to suck Justin's face rather than play a game. "Ah! Come on, Lisa. It'll be fun." Justin said. Lisa pouted. "Fine! OK! I'll play your stupid game!" "Cool!" Chris said. "Who'll go first?" asked Evelyn. "You go, Evelyn." Chris said. "You tell great stories." Evelyn thought for a moment. She wanted something to put Lisa in her place. "I got something." "What?" Justin asked. Lisa stared at him, jealous he was interested in anything Evelyn had to say. "You know Milford and Bonnie? They live in that shack on the cliffs in Bear Cove." "Yeah?" "It was a hot summer day. The heat got to them. They were drinking, like they always do. Milford was making breakfast in the afternoon. You know they always sleep in. Milford, paying more attention to his opened beer than his cooking, broke the yolk on one of the eggs he was cooking for Bonnie's breakfast. Bonnie liked her eggs sunny-side-up and unbroken. He got scared. There were no more eggs, so he covered the broken egg with a piece of toast and took it to the bed, where Bonnie was waking with a hangover." "My turn!" Chris said. "Bonnie lifted the toast to spread jelly on it and saw the runny yolk covering her bacon. She looked at Milford, 'You bastard! You broke my yoke!' "She threw the plate at Milford, missing his sweat-soaked, balding head. 'Don't you ever serve me a broken yoke again!' she screamed. Egg, toast and bacon slid down the wall. "Excellent!" Evelyn said. "I want a turn" Lisa whined. She wouldn't be outdone by Evelyn. "How about this? Milford kicked the shards of glass with his foot and stomped away." "That's just dumb, Lisa!" Evelyn said before she could stop herself. "You're a bitch. You're jealous of me and Justin!" "Am not!" "Are too!" "Come on you two!" Chris said. "You're ruining the game." "My turn!" Justin said. "How about this? Bonnie jumps out of the bed. Milford, afraid of her, runs to the kitchen. She runs after him. She grabs a knife and starts slashing, but in her drunken stupor, cuts only air. Milford runs outside." "Way cool, Justin!" Evelyn said. "My turn now!" "You suck!" Lisa says under her breath. "What did you say, Hoover© face?" "Come on you two!" Chris tries to stop a fight-about-to- happen. "Let's just play! Evelyn, it's your turn." "OK! Fine! Check this out! Milford runs outside. He runs to the woodshed, Bonnie chased after him. She waved the knife and screams, 'I'm going to cut your damn throat, you yolk breaker! I'll teach you!' "Milford sees an axe and grabs it. Bonnie smashes the door open, swinging the knife. Milford, in fear, swings the axe and slices Bonnie's head off. Her momentum carries her a few feet. She crashes into the work bench and slides to the floor. Blood gushes from her severed head and her neck." "That is way cool, Evelyn!" Justin says. Lisa jabs him in the ribs with her elbow, "I think it's stupid!" "You're just a bitch. You couldn't do better. What did you say? He kicked the glass and walked away? Now that was stupid." Evelyn growls. "Maybe it was a bad idea to play this game." Chris moans. "Let's just forget it. We'll be in Halifax soon. I need to pee so bad I can taste it. What they say is true, 'Drink one beer and pee two.'" Lisa turned her face toward the breeze coming through the window and enjoyed the canopy of trees along the country road. It helped wear off the night of drinking. Ahead, she noticed a man flagging down the bus while slinging a large black bag over his shoulder. He stepped onto the bus, turned his head toward the bag, slapped it, and yelled, "This bitch won't bother me any more!" The last thing Evelyn remembered before passing out, was the sight of the bag splitting open and Bonnie's lifeless head hitting the floor, splashing clotted blood on those unlucky enough to sit in the front. Michael T Smith I love your comments and include a few every week. Keep on waving!!! Send them to mtsmith@qwestonline.com You can read more of my stories by going to: http://subs.zinester.com/86758/ Or go to: http://heartsandhumor.com/blog/archives.php To sign up to my twice weekly post: http://subs.zinester.com/86758/ |
|
| << July20, 2006 - Hearts and Humor - Tippy |
July28, 2006 - Hearts and Humor - Bucket Full of Holes >> |
|
Hearts and Humor Archives Index
|
Subscribe
|
|
|
Archives powered by Zinester's Mailing List Service
Details on Hearts and Humor |
Browse for more newsletters at Zinester's Ezine Directory
Managed by Zinester's Mailing List Management |