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| << November20, 2006 - Hearts and Humor - You Can't Make Them Love You |
November27, 2006 - Hearts and Humor - I'm hurting >> |
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Hello, My Wonderful Family For those celebrating Thanksgiving like I am, HAPPY THANKSGIVING!!!! We have 840 family members now. Please keep passing the stories around. We have a long way to go to get to 1000 members by the end of the year. Many of you emailed me regarding my series called, "The Beginning of The End." You wanted to know what happened after Georgia passed and how I met Ginny. There are a few stories in my archives that explain it, but I decided to pull them all together into a very long story. At the end, I add a few poems I wrote. Poetry is not my thing, but love makes us do things we might never normally do. I'm not complaining. Enjoy (Sorry this is so long) Mike The Beginning of the End - A New Beginning After Georgia died, I was lost. What was I going to do? How do people deal with the loss of a spouse? I was and am an internet junky. I sat in front of my computer and searched for internet support groups for widows and widowers. Several groups popped up. One group was called, "Youngwidows2." It was for both widows and widowers. I was asked to send my story to the moderators for them to approve my membership. Soon after I sent my story, I received an email telling me I was approved. They posted my story to the group and asked members to welcome me. My email inbox filled with emails from members welcoming me and telling their stories. Tears filled my eyes each time I read one. For the first time since my ordeal began, I didn't feel alone. There were so many people who had or were going through what I did. I grew comfortable and began to post more. When I felt bad, I would email them and they responded with words of support. I even started posting a few of my stories to them. The members had been through a lot, but they surprised me with their ability to laugh. There were days it was hard to believe they were a group in mourning. They had a chat room, where members went to chat and support each other. I would go there in the evenings and laugh at the crazy things people posted. Time passed. I began to come out of my protective shell. My humor came back and I had the members laughing at my antics. There was a woman in the group. Her name was Ginny. I didn't know it, but she had been watching my posts with interest. I later learned, she thought the fact I wrote Georgia's eulogy a special thing. "Not many men would be able to do that." she told me later. She read every story I posted, and thought, any man who could write like that had to be special. Ginny and I were always two of the members in the chat room. She had a wonderful sense of humor and made me laugh. She would post things to the group, and then message her friends, "Let's see what he says now." I was oblivious. I fell for the bait each time, typing in a comic remark. One night in chat, a member was having a rough time. Ginny posted saying, "I'm sorry you're having a bad day. If you need to talk, here is my number." She posted her number. I messaged her privately, "Ginny, is that your real number?" "Yes!" she replied. "Can I call you sometime?" "Sure!" "Can I call you now?" I asked. "Sure." "OK, I'm calling. I didn't know this until much later, but after I said I was calling, Ginny jumped out of her chair, did a little dance, and sang, "He's going to call me! He's going to call me!" We talked on the phone everyday after that, sometimes three or four times and all evening long. A month later, Ginny, who lived in Charlotte, NC at the time, decided to fly to New Jersey to meet me in person. I'll never forget the butterflies I had in my stomach, as I waited at the airport for her plane to arrive. I watched the board announcing arrivals, and saw her plane had landed. I stood by the exit gate watching for her. My palms were sweaty, and my heart was pounding. I was finally going to meet the woman I knew I loved. We hadn't met yet, but I knew I was in love with her already. I turned and there she was. She saw me, smiled and asked, "Mike?" and then she was in my arms. I held her so tight. She was so beautiful and fit in my arms perfectly. I think I said, "It is so nice to finally be able to hold you." I kissed the top of her head and then her lips. On the escalator to get her bags, I confessed I was nervous and excited all at the same time. In the car, I reached out, and she slid into my arms. "I have been waiting a long time for this," I said and kissed her tenderly. On the way home, at every stop light I would take a kiss break. At home, I cooked her dinner, and we had a beautiful evening, then a beautiful weekend, and then a beautiful everything, including a beautiful and crazy wedding four months later. Now we have a beautiful life together. I LOVE YOU, GINNY Ginny once wrote the following about her experience that night: He was nervous and I wasn't. No one could believe I was flying from NC to NJ to meet someone I met over the internet. I knew I wasn't flying to just "meet someone". I knew I was flying to my future. As I walked through the gate, I knew him immediately. During that first hug, I knew that I had come home. It felt so right. It still is. We counted the days we had actually been together before we got married. 30 days. That's it. There are a lot of people who can't believe we got married so soon and they just don't understand. For the first eight months, we were together 24x7, except for a month when he worked in the city. If you think about it, we spent more time together in those first eight months than most people who are married for two to three years, and I love him more now than I did then. I asked God to bring someone into my life. Someone to love me completely and I could love completely...no holds barred. My prayers were answered. I love you too, Michael. Actually, it's my day so I love you MORE!!!!! Ginny ************************* During the summer after we married, we spent a lot of time on our deck reading. One day a memory returned to me. Many years ago, when I was in my early teens, my dad was in the hospital to have a lump removed from his neck. Across the room from him was a man. We were visiting my dad one day, when this man's wife came to visit. They kissed, she pulled up a chair, and they talked for a few minutes. They soon both opened their books and for an hour were completely content to just be together, no words were needed. They took great comfort in just being in the presence of each other. After an hour or so, they closed their books, talked for a few minutes, kissed and she was gone. This happened about thirty years ago, and the memory comes back to me often. I remember thinking, "That is the kind of relationship I want." Quite a thought for a kid in his mid teens, however, I knew that was what I wanted. Ginny and I spent a lot of time out on the deck reading that summer. Once in a while I would look up and say, "Gin, time for an 'I love you break." She looked up. "I love you, Sweetie, and now back to our story." and I would read again. "Love you too, Hun." A smile came to my face. I have the relationship I dreamed about 30 years ago. I have been blessed. Ginny inspires me to write poetry, something I hardly ever do. My heart is filled with feelings for my beautiful Ginny. Here are two poems I wrote for Ginny: And That's You When Life's storms raged with cold, snowy winds, There appeared someone special, warming my heart. And that's you. A life of winter had descended, But a new spring came, bright green hope. And that's you When death's ugly shadow cast deep, dark gloom, An angel swooped down New life And that's you. Life's choices, a series of doors. Sometimes we choose, sometimes we're pushed. New door opened; the path was clear. And that's you. Ginny, you are my warmth, my hope, my life and my path. I love you and thank you for coming into my life. Every Day Dear Lord Every day I look at her Every day I see her Every day I feel her love Every day I reach out, hold her, look to the sky and wonder what I did in life to deserve her. At night I hold her in my arms At night I feel her warmth At night I hear her heart beat. At night hold her hand, shed a tear of joy, look to the sky and wonder what I did in life to deserve her. All week I feel such joy All week I melt with every thought of her All week I look forward to being near her again All week I think of her, wait to be close her, crave her nearness, look to the sky and wonder what I did in life to deserve her. In all my life have I known such happiness? In all my life have I known such joy? In all my life have I known such love? In all my life have I known my Ginny? I look to the sky and wonder, what I did right in life to deserve her. Thank you, Lord I love you, Ginny. Michael T. Smith Please share my stories and include the link for your friends to join our family. Help me spread the word. I Love all of you. Mike ************* To sign up for my twice weekly post or to read more of my stories, please go to:http://subs.zinester.com/86758/ Please send your comments to mtsmith@qwestonline.com. I love your words of encouragement and promise to reply to all of them. I will include a few in each week's post. Now for some comments on my last story: If you didn't love them, you wouldn't take your time to write about your late wife her late parents. With all the crap going on in our word -- and America's belly-flop into moral decay -- it's a pleasure to read a hearty love story by a fellow family guy. I look forward to Part 3. Peace, Ron G. ******************** Michael, I read all of the stories Parts 1-4. Ending with your beloved Georgia's parting. How she must have suffered but you were good to her. And God knows your heart. I am sorry but I did not see what year you lost her. God bless you Jene ******************** Loved the story about Kitten. Thanks for sharing. Diana ******************** Oh Michael, I thought I was the only person in the world who had a cat like yours. We found her at the side of a busy interstate at about age 5 weeks. Brought her home where she established her residence in the clothes closet. She lived there for 3 years, only coming out to eat and use litter pan. She finally made friends with my husband and laid on the bed with him but still would not leave our bedroom. He was able to get her in a cage to take her to be spayed and get her shots. When my husband passed away, she finally made friends with me, but no one else. She is now 7 years old and hides in the closet or bedroom until night when she sleeps on the bed. Thanks for letting me know there is another one like her in the world. Clara |
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| << November20, 2006 - Hearts and Humor - You Can't Make Them Love You |
November27, 2006 - Hearts and Humor - I'm hurting >> |
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