| Gibbleguts Daily News July 17th
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Today's Joke
Homeless Lady - Thanks Larry
A woman was walking down Yonge Street in Toronto when she was
accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking homeless woman who
asked her for a couple of dollars for dinner.
The woman took out her billfold, extracted ten dollars and asked, "If I
give you this money, will you buy some wine with it instead of
dinner?"
"No, I had to stop drinking years ago", the homeless woman replied.
"Will you use it to go shopping instead of buying food?" the woman
asked. "No, I don't waste time shopping, the homeless woman said. "I
need to spend all my time trying to stay alive."
"Will you spend this on a beauty salon instead of food?" the woman
asked. "Are you NUTS!" replied the homeless woman. "I haven't had my
hair done in 20 years!"
"Well," said the woman, "I'm not going to give you the money. Instead,
I'm going to take you out for dinner
with my hubby and myself tonight."
The homeless woman was astounded. "Won't your husband be furious with
you for doing that? I know I'm dirty, and I probably smell pretty
disgusting."
The woman replied, "That's okay. It's important for him to see what a
woman looks like after she has given up shopping, hair appointments
and wine."
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Today's Clips
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Helifishing - The sport of kings!
1-2-3-4 - Feist on Sesame Street
Previous Day 's Clips
Barney Rubble's off-color retort - Think of the children!
Cat and Fox - You thought your room mate was annoying!
German river surfing - Achtung baby!
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Today's Cartoons
GibbleGuts Cartoon
Editorial Cartoon
The Other Coast
Food for Thought
Did you hear about the guy whose whole
left side was cut off? He's all right now.
-Unknown
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