Featured Column
Is That Your New Year's Resolution
(or a copy of the US Constitution)
by Leeuna Foster
As we begin a new year, many of us make our lists of resolutions.
On New Years Eve, we make these promises which we fully intend to keep, but sadly enough, by January second, half or them have already been broken. Valentines Day finds us with a whole heap of broken promises, many of which weren't even on the list to begin with.
A recent independent survey provided a startling fact. Of the fifty people surveyed seventy four of them said that losing weight was at the top of their lists, which verifies beyond a doubt, my recent theory that I can't count.
Dieting has become America's second favorite pastime, next to dining out at the all-you-can-eat, buffet style restaurants, which is the number one favorite.
All this dieting and weight loss has me thinking. Exactly what happens to all that fat we lose? In my lifetime alone I have lost the equivalent of a bus load of rock singers and their groupies. Something that once existed cannot simply disappear...it must go somewhere. Could all that fat floating around have caused the hole in the ozone?
I swore off dieting a year ago. After two months, twenty three days, six hours, ten minutes and three seconds of eating nothing but weeds and roots, I threw down the radish I was gnawing on and fell to my knees upon the kitchen floor. In my best Southern accent I proclaimed, "As God is my witness, I'll never be hungry again."
Why do I need hip bones anyway? I'm over fifty. Finally! It took me about three years to get over turning fifty. Realizing you're half a century old causes a severe shock to the system.
Which brings up another valid point. What happened to 'ageing gracefully'?
The market is flooded with products that claim to remove wrinkles, restore our skin to the way it was when we were two years old, and make us look exactly like the twelve-year-old model in the commercial. I will have to admit that this was a brilliant marketing campaign strategy. The copy writers figured out exactly which buttons to push to get us to buy the products. The key words being anti-wrinkle, rejuvenate, and replenish. Manufacturers of cosmetics can now fill a tiny jar with bacon grease, slap a label on it that promises to reduce the signs of ageing and we women will gladly pay four hundred dollars for it.
And let's be honest with ourselves. Why do we do it? We do it because of peer pressure. We don't do it for the men in our lives; we do it for other women. We ladies are forever trying to under age and out skinny one another. After all, will hubby mind very much if we've added a few tiny lines and wrinkles, or a few extra pounds? Unless we are blocking the TV screen, I don't think he will even notice.
And men don't worry that much about ageing. They couldn't care less about moisturizers, scented bath oils, anti wrinkle cremes and exfoliating body wash. Men will take a shower in toilet bowl cleaner if there's nothing else within reach at the time. After all, they don't grow old, they become distinguished. They aren't referred to as little old grey haired fat ladies; they're called robust, silver-haired, mature, gentlemen.
I may have just answered the age old question, "What's in a name?"
Most of my resolutions for the new year are the same as in previous years. I always promise myself I will spend more time with the family, find a way to reduce stress, begin an exercise program, lose weight, start saving money, stop kicking the neighbor's cat, never again forget to pay the cable bill on time, etc. So I didn't make a list this year. I simply added a few more to last year's list and changed the date.
I really need to keep a few of these promises though, because my list is beginning to resemble a copy of the U.S Constitution.
Ask the Editor
Dear Editor,
I am interested in converting my print book into an electronic book and begin selling it on the internet as a downloadable ebook. What advice can you give me?
Published Author
Dear PA,
Electronic books, or ebooks as they are referred to, have become the favorite book style of most readers. They are less expensive, more reader friendly and can be downloaded and read immediatly following the purchase, as opposed to waiting weeks for the book to be shipped.
Most ebooks are now in PDF format, which makes it user friendly for both Windows PC and Mac. I would highly recommend this format for your book.
Thank you for writing to me and I hope this will be helpful to you.
Leeuna
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December's
Freebie |
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Are you like me and always find yourself reaching for
the dictionary when you are unclear about a word? I have found an excellent online
dictionary and Thesaurus and I bookmarked the page. Now, instead of lifting the
hundred pound book from the shelf, I can find the word with just a click of my mouse.
Here is the link to it:
http://www.m-w.com/
I hope you find it as helpful as
I have.
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