|
Starfish: Archives Index
|
Subscribe
|
|
| << February04, 2004 - Starfish: Valedictory, Vance Agee |
February05, 2004 - Starfish: The Pretty One, ROger Dean Kiser >> |
|
Greetings, Ripplemakers ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ This is the last story in the series Finally I Understand: The Series Part IX: With Knowledge Comes Freedom These last eight stories was a walk through my life highlighting all the times that I had made mistakes without understanding why. I have learning disabilities that I really did know that I had until I was close to 40 years old. I did rather well in elementary school. Believe it or not math was my favourite suject back then. But the learning disabilities started surfacing in high school. I had gone to high school during the late 60's. While the new field of Learning Disabilities now surfaced in the educational field thefield was in its infancy and therefore no educator had picked up on mine. It was believed that I just did poorly in math at the time. Furthermore I was got up in the social myth that girls do much poorly in math than boys do. If you remember from this series that Mr. Said my grade eight math teacher would always say to me " Pay attention, Carol, I am going to pull your ears". I was paying attention I just couldn't understand the concepts. I had done so well in my other subjects that the school ignored me completely. They felt that I was just lazy or uninterested or just a girl so why bother at all. At home I had trouble with losing and finding things. Whenever I lost something my grandmother would tell me that if I did not have my head attached to my shoulders, I would lose that as well. Whenever I looked for what I had lost I could not find it even if it was practically in front of my eyes. My grandmother would again say, "If it had teeth it would bite you". I was too young to know that these symptoms were also signs of a learning disability. I first discovered my math disabilities when I worked for the insurance company. I was not able to add up columns of numbers without making errors. Later in accounting class, I had trouble transferring numbers from one side of a balance sheet to another. Because of this phenomenon I spent hours of extra time looking for my errors. I began reversing telephone numbers in yet another job. Finally, I lost my job at the telemarketing company when I could not add up simple numbers correctly. Though it became apparent early on that I had a learning disability in math and logic type activities ( remember the terrible marks on the G.R.E), it was not so evident that I had a learning disability in the language/writing areas also. Writing had always been my forte. Therefore, it never became apparent to me that I indeed had a learning disability in these areas until my Masters degree at university. It was at this time that writing was the priority of the program. Consequently, the disability in writing shone through. In the early years of my filing days at the insurance company, I blamed Lee, the other lady, who sometimes filed for me for making the mistakes in the cardex. I lost the $1,000 prize for best story at college because of a mistake in the very first sentence and still I did not equate my errors to a learning disability. It took my university experience to bring it to the forefront. All my life people called me lazy, careless, stupid, stubborn, and unwilling to learn yet I never knew why. I knew that I did try as hard as I could to accomplish the homework and work related assignments that others take for granted. Some people went as far as to tell me that I did not accomplish these simple feats because I was unmotivated or uninterested. None of it was true. In fact, I enjoy scrabble with a passion, yet there was many a game I lost because of my learning disability. I failed to see some choice moves. In the early days before I knew that I had a learning disability Dee would just shake her head and point out to me where I should have played. She would ask me why I didn't play that move when the board was wide open for me to do it. My answer was always the same, I didn't see the move and then I would say to her, "I am just a lousy player". Now when this happens, I can explain to her that I didn't see it because I have a learning disability which sometimes prevents me from seeing fine detail. I can see the large picture but have trouble focusing on the small picture; in other words, that one choice move coveted on a scrabble board! For years I internalized that I was stupid, lazy, unmotivated, stubborn, and incapable of learning new things. Now, I finally understand that I have learning disabilities. I now know that I am an intelligent person, who has learned to cope with her disabilities. I am a person who is persistent and despite major obstacles can still realize a dream - a Masters in Counselling Psychology. I am a person that is resourceful and can work to find solutions that will not only realize my limitations but also chart of path for my success in whatever I do. Now, I finally understand who I am and what I can do, without focusing on what I cannot do. Now, I know that despite the learning disabilities I have accomplished much in my life and I am proud of who I am! Carol Roach, M.Ed About me: I have a Masters in Counselling Psychology. I have written for several newsletter including this one. I run my own newsletter and I will soon be publishing my book - Picking Up the Pieces: A woman's Journey. If you would like to comment about this story feel free to contact me at: winterose @ videotron.ca ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ May you be blessed today Bob Johnston Editor / Publisher ~~~ *** ~~~ *** ~~~ *** ~~~ *** ~~~ *** ~~~ *** ~~~ *** ~~~ *** ~~~ *** If you like Starfish, please recommend it to your friends and help us grow. ~~~~~Important Information~~~~~ To subscribe to Starfish, visit our web site at www.ripplemaker.com, click on "Starfish" and then click on "Subscribe" **** **** **** To cancel your subscription, send a message to: starfish@ripplemaker.com with "Cancel Starfish" in the subject **** **** **** To contribute a story for starfish, send it to: Starfish@Ripplemaker.com **** **** **** To view archives (past issues), click on "Read Archived Stories" from the Starfish Page at www.ripplemaker.com **** **** **** If you encounter a problem, please send e-mail to me at Starfish@ Ripplemaker.com |
|
| << February04, 2004 - Starfish: Valedictory, Vance Agee |
February05, 2004 - Starfish: The Pretty One, ROger Dean Kiser >> |
|
Starfish: Archives Index
|
Subscribe
|
|
|
Archives powered by Zinester's Mailing List Service
Details on Starfish: |
Browse for more newsletters at Zinester's Ezine Directory
Managed by Zinester's Mailing List Management |