Storytime Tapestry Newsletter

The newsletter devoted to spreading love and cultural awareness around the world.

Carol?s Corner

November 17, 2007

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The Wake ? Reflections Upon Death ? Part 111

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Since this is a series please read

Eulogy

Afterworld

first before reading this article

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Even though we believe in an afterlife, I think that most of us really cannot predict how we will react when we are faced with the death of a loved one. I think death affects us differently, and is as unique an experience as was the uniqueness of the person we mourn for. What we think we will do and how we think we will cope with the situation may be very different when the situation actually happens.

I once read that to mourn for the dead was only a selfish reaction on our part, if we believe in the afterlife and that our dearly departed have gone on to a better place then we should rejoice for them; not cry. Randall understood that and he did rejoice. However, I have yet to see many people actually rejoice. For the most part, rejoicing can be considered a cultural factor.

The first celebration to illustrate this point that comes to mind is the Irish wake (Caoineadh). However the Maori of New Zealand practiced a celebration of this nature for the dead long before the European custom.

Caoineadh, the Irish Wake traditionally was held in the home of the deceased for the purposes of viewing the corpse prior to burial. It was a mixed time of mourning and gaiety where extended family and friends gathered together to console the grieving family and to celebrate the life of the departed. Food and alcohol was served and sometimes the wake appeared to be a big party. In the traditional Irish wake, the women wash and prepare the body for viewing. All clocks in the house are stopped, and a rosary may be placed in the hands of the deceased while a Mass is said in the house to prepare the soul?s passage to the afterworld. The following day the deceased is transported to the church in a closed coffin and visitors who were not able to attend the ceremony at the house have a last chance before the corpse is buried.

This traditional Irish wake is descendant from an older Celtic tradition. The Celts believed that the corpse was on its way to a better world and thus the reason for the celebration. Today in Ireland, the wake may be held completely at the funeral parlor and not at the home of the deceased.

The Viking practice of the wake involved sending the corpse off to sea, and then telling stories about the deceased in their honour at a designated grave site. This was call a day of observance for the dead.

In African traditions there is the funeral procession where the dead are carried through the streets and the mourners, shout, chant, and sing. During the celebration, the Africans drink the libation, the (liquid sometimes alcohol), sing and dance.

The Jewish people sit Shiva. Shiva is the seven day mourning period after the death of a loved one. The focus of the service is to celebrate the life the departed once had. The survivors also concentrate on their feelings to facilitate the healing process. Shiva is a time of reflection and prayer. Every prayer, including the Kaddish, is designed to celebrate life and not death.

In North America, our tradition is to show the body at the funeral parlor. It is usually a solemn occasion. Friends and family gather around the casket, while some touch the corpse and others do not, some cry and others stand in quiet observance. Some have a priest or minister say a prayer over the coffin, and again others do not, and finally some people have a separate church service. The reactions of the family and mourners are diverse, some laugh, and talk, and socialize, others are quiet and reflective, some cry while others look on. Until the day it happens no one can really predict their reaction to the death of a loved one or friend. Nora?s son Randy rejoiced at his mother?s passing, her daughter Lavenia seemed cool and collected. Her niece Renate cried softly, her granddaughter Nadine sobbed her heart out and her grandson Kenny stood quietly looking on.

How did I react to the funeral service? Well, I surprised myself. Never would I have guessed that I would have taken Nora?s death in the way that I did.

to be continued

Carol Roach

winterose@videotron.ca

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Check out her newest book,

Angels Watching Over Me. http://www.lulu.com/content/964306

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