STORYTIME TAPESTRY

Deepak Morris??™s Weekly Column

 East Meets West

July 7, 2005

To continue with my vision of a world tapestry of love and understanding of cultural values throughout the world, every Thursday we will be graced by the artistic vision of Mr. Deepak Morris, a wonderful playwright and friend from Prune, India. 

His plays have been preformed in front of audiences in Toronto, Canada

The Economist

By Deepak Morris

Copyright ?© Deepak Morris 2005

(A classroom at a college. The PROFESSOR is seated at a desk. The STUDENT enters)

STUDENT      Good morning, Sir

PROFESSOR Good Morning. Please sit down (as the STUDENT sits) and relax. No need to be nervous about the Viva

STUDENT      Thank you, Sir

PROFESSOR Let??™s get started right away. You are interested in economics?

STUDENT      Yes, Sir

PROFESSOR Good. Why?

STUDENT      Why?

PROFESSOR Yes, why. You must have some reason

SUDENT        It??™s a scoring subject

PROFESSOR I see. Well, what can you tell me about the Malthusian theory of population?

STUDENT      Er??¦ it was formulated by Malthus??¦ (pauses, then, as the PROFESSOR shows no inclination to ask another question) and??¦ er??¦ it??™s about population

PROFESSOR (Sighs) Do you agree that population must be controlled?

STUDENT      Oh yes

PROFESSOR Name some methods of population control

STUDENT      Oh??¦ um??¦ there??™s sterilisation

PROFESSOR Yes?

STUDENT      That??™s??¦ er??¦ that??™s where you put it in hot water and boil it

PROFESSOR (After a pause) I see

STUDENT      And... er... then, there??™s the barrier method

PROFESSOR Please elaborate

STUDENT      That??™s where the woman puts a barrier to conception

PROFESSOR Oh?

STUDENT      Yes??¦ er??¦ by putting up a barrier??¦

PROFESSOR Indeed??¦

STUDENT      (Almost rushing in) ??¦ by using a rubber barrier (PROFESSOR looks on) er??¦ in the bed... she uses a long rubber partition in the bed

PROFESSOR The bed??¦ I see

STUDENT      No! Not the bed??¦ er??¦ at home. She divides the house with a rubber barrier

PROFESSOR Interesting

STUDENT      And then there??™s abstinence

PROFESSOR And that is?

STUDENT      Er... that is where the husband becomes absent??¦ From home. If he is absent, there are no babies

PROFESSOR I see the logic. Any other methods?

STUDENT      Er??¦ the natural method

PROFESSOR Please elaborate

STUDENT      Er??¦ the natural method is??¦ er... is??¦

PROFESSOR Do go on

STUDENT      ??¦ where the husband does not marry the wife

PROFESSOR Indeed? And what does he do?

STUDENT      He curbs his virility

PROFESSOR (Sits up with interest) He does?

STUDENT      Yes, he becomes celebrated

PROFESSOR Celebrated?

STUDENT      Wait! That??™s not it. He becomes, er, cerebral??¦ no. er??¦ I can??™t get the exact word right now, Sir??¦

PROFESSOR Celibate?

STUDENT      Yes!

PROFESSOR Hmmm... I see. And do you have any other thoughts on methods to control the population?

STUDENT      Well, I was thinking??¦

PROFESSOR You were?

STUDENT      Yes??¦ I was thinking??¦ why don??™t people just do what you and I did last night? That doesn??™t make babies, right? (Smiles)

PROFESSOR (Pause) Fifty marks out of a Hundred

STUDENT      Seventy

PROFESSOR I can??™t go that high. If I give you Seventy, the paper has to be countersigned by another professor

STUDENT      Which professor? Just tell me his name and I??™ll fix everything

BLACKOUT

Deepak Morris

rhapword@yahoo.com

* * *

Founder of Rhapsody Theatre, author, playwright,
actor and director Deepak Morris has been
associated with Theatre and Communication all
his life. A Master of Commerce from Pune
University, Master's Diploma holder in
Management from The Institute of Management
Development and Research (IMDR), Pune, and
Diploma holder in Computer Studies from the
National Computing Centre, UK, Deepak
combines a passion for theatre with professional management techniques
to deliver consistently well staged theatrical
performances. An accomplished actor himself,
Deepak has won numerous awards for acting and
debating, including the "Best Actor" award at
the International Year of the Youth Drama
Festival in Pune and the "Best Male Newcomer
Award" in 1997 in Dubai, U.A.E. Having acted
in numerous productions in India and Dubai,
Deepak began writing and directing his own
plays on a regular basis in March 2001. To
date, he has written several one-act plays
and skits and his group, Rhapsody Theatre,
has staged no less than 13 plays in three
years, a record of sorts.

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