Storytime Tapestry Newsletter

The newsletter devoted to spreading love and cultural awareness throughout the world.

Special Treat ??“ Jodi Flesberg Lilly

Feb 28, 2006

Old Spice

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I remember the scent of Old Spice on my father??™s freshly shaven face as he leaned over to kiss my cheek before leaving for work in the morning or to go out dancing for the evening with my mother. The musky, spicy aroma of my candle takes my body back to those moments??”ingrained in my cells??”the cool, slightly moist feel of his cheek next to mine as he picked me up and held me tight when I was afraid or hurt or sad. I am four years old again, and seven, having fallen off my bike. I am fifteen, crying over some boy.
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I am eighteen, standing at the back of the church waiting for him to arrive??”he was always late! Two of my brothers stand on either side of the entrance, they are the ushers and all the guests have been seated. Finally, he dashes in looking a bit sheepish. He pauses a moment to look at me in my long white dress. I feel the safety of his arms and the soft, sweet, musky aroma as he kisses me hello before offering his arm and draws my arm through his for our walk down the aisle. He is about to give my hand in marriage to a man he knows is much too young and reckless with his own life to be a good husband to me.

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I am forty-three, waiting to be seated for breakfast in the coffee shop of the motel where my brother, nephew and I all stayed during our visit. I turned to see him through the glass in the door to the restaurant. ???Hi! Mind if I join you???? he asked with a smile a quick hug and a kiss.

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???Please do. What a nice surprise! What great timing you have. What are you doing here? It??™s so early, I didn??™t think I??™d get a chance to see you again before we left for the airport.???

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???I called your brother??™s room but he was still sleeping. I came to pick up the tuxedos from the guys to take them back to the tux rental place.???

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We sat and ate and talked for the better part of an hour, just the two of us, reflecting on my youngest brother??™s wedding, the occasion for the visit. We spoke of all the miraculous little things that had taken place over the past few days and how wonderful it was that we six Flesbergs were together again for the first time in almost 20 years.

This was the only time during my visit that he and I had a chance to talk and enjoy each other??™s company. He told me that as happy as he and my mother were about my brother??™s marriage, my having been there with them was the highlight, and the real cause for celebration. I knew then I??™d been away too long. Much too long.

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Less than eight months later, before I turned 44, my father was gone. The last time I saw him was at his funeral. The absence of the scent of Old Spice was notable. There was no hug, no kiss. No hello and no good-bye. I could feel him with me but I could no longer touch him.? 

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Today, I am fifty and I unsuspectingly pick up a candle for a writing exercise and my father is with me once again. He has touched me through time and said, ???Hello. I??™m right here.???

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?© 2006 Jodi Flesberg Lilly

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