Storytime Tapestry Newsletter

The newsletter devoted to spreading love and cultural awareness throughout the world.

We will run a series of stories by Loren Moore and other writers as our final farewell to a wonderful man.?  There will also be a tribute by Kathy Baker to be included in this series as well.? 

Special Treat ??“ Loren Moore & Kathleene S. Baker

March 15, 2006

THE TEXAS STATE FAIR, 2005

By,

Kathleene S. Baker & Loren Moore

? 

? 

? 

? 

KATHY WRITES:

? 

Loren was grumbling to himself as he headed for the phone.?  He??™d had three phone calls since starting to eat his breakfast and his bacon and eggs were getting cold.?  ???HELLO!???? 

? 

???Whoa, that??™s a nice tone of voice first thing in the morning.???

? 

???Kathy, I don??™t feel ???nice??™ right now.?  This blasted phone keeps ringing and my breakfast is cold.?  I might as well give it to Little Fox and make another one for me.???

? 

???Oh, quit your fussing and listen to me,??? Kathy snapped.?  ???I know you entered a pie in the State Fair, and I entered a cross-stitch project.?  Guess what??  They are judging those entries on the same day.?  I thought maybe we could go together because Jerry has jury duty, and Johnnie has that trip planned.?  If either of us win, it would be a lot more fun to have someone to share the excitement with.?  So, whatcha think??  Is it a date????

? 

? 

LOREN WRITES:

? 

???THAT SUITS ME, NOW CAN I GET BACK TO MY BREAKFAST??  I??™M GOING TO HAVE TO COOK SOME MORE BACON AND EGGS.?  THESE ARE TOO COLD TO EAT NOW.?  I??™LL GIVE THEM TO LITTLE FOX.?  IT??™S NO WONDER SHE IS GETTING SO HEAVY.???

? 

LATER IN THE DAY LOREN CALLED KATHY AND ASKED HER TO PICK HIM UP THE NEXT DAY TO GO TO THE FAIR GROUNDS.?  HE DIDN??™T LIKE TO DRIVE IN THAT DALLAS TRAFFIC.

? 

WELL, THAT WENT OVER LIKE A LEAD BALLOON, BUT KATHY FINALLY SAID SHE WOULD.?  SO THE NEXT MORNING LOREN WAS UP, HAD HIS BREAKFAST, AND WAS SETTING OUT ON THE FRONT PORCH WHEN KATHY DROVE UP.

? 

KATHY WRITES:

? 

Actually, Loren was sitting on the porch daydreaming about winning a 1^st prize ribbon for his ???Surprise Pie.???

Kathy could see Loren from a distance of two houses, and laid on the horn just for the fun of it.?  Loren was so startled he tumbled off his wicker chair, landed on top of Little Fox, and they both yelped in unison.

? 

Kathy parked, and casually walked up to the porch.?  ???Need a hand getting up, old buddy????

? 

???Don??™t touch me, or my dog, and don??™t call me buddy!?  And just look at my chair; it??™s flat as a fritter.????  Taking him at his word, Kathy let him flop around on the porch until he was on his feet again.

? 

???Let??™s get this show on the road; we??™ve got miles to go.?  The way I figure it, we should have time to go to the livestock barns before it??™s time for either of our entries to be judged.???

? 

Loren limped to Kathy??™s truck, and after two attempts was finally seated inside, although he was rubbing his backside.?  ???So, why do you want to hang around the stinking livestock barns??  Oh ??“ WATCH OUT!????  he screeched.

? 

???Goats!?  And, pigs and cows,??? Kathy said with a twinkle in her eye.?  ???I??™ve never gone to the fair without going to the barns first; so don??™t give me any trouble.?  Oh, I love holding those baby goats with little nubs barely visible on top of their tiny little heads.?  Someone always has babies there, and they??™ve never turned me away yet.???

? 

Loren rolled his eyes, rubbed his behind again, and threw his head back against the headrest.

? 

LOREN WRITES:

? 

WHEN LOREN AND KATHY GOT TO THE FAIR GROUNDS, THEY WENT TO THE CATTLE BARN FIRST.?  AS THEY WERE WALKING DOWN THE WIDE CENTER AISLE LOOKING IN THE PENS ON EACH SIDE, THEY HEARD A LOUD VOICE BEHIND THEM HOLLERING, ???MAKE WAY, FOLKS.???

? 

AS THEY TURNED AROUND, THEY SAW TWO MEN HOLDING ROPES THAT WERE ATTACHED TO A RING IN THE NOSE OF A VERY BIG TEXAS LONGHORN.?  ONE MAN WALKED ON EACH SIDE OF THE LONGHORN, AND THEY WERE LEADING HIM TO ONE OF THE PENS FURTHER DOWN THE AISLE.

? 

KATHY SAID, ???OH, LOOK AT THAT TEXAS LONG HORN STEER, LOREN.?  HIS HORNS MUST STICK OUT SIX FEET ON EACH SIDE OF HIS HEAD.???

? 

???BULL!????  LOREN SAID.

? 

???WELL, MISTER SMARTY PANTS, I GUESS I KNOW A TEXAS LONGHORN STEER WHEN I SEE ONE.?  I WENT TO THE UNIVERSITY OF TEXAS AT AUSTIN FOR FOUR YEARS, AND OUR MASCOT WAS A YOUNG TEXAS LONGHORN STEER.?  HIS NAME WAS BEVO.?  I??™M TELLING YOU, THAT WAS A TEXAS LONGHORN STEER BEING LED DOWN THE AISLE.???

? 

???BULL,??? LOREN SAID AGAIN.

? 

KATHY??™S FACE STARTED TURNING RED, STEAM WAS BEGINNING TO COME OUT OF HER EARS, AND HER EYES WERE SHOOTING DAGGERS.?  ???OK, YOU KNUCKLE-HEADED, KNOCK-KNEED, BOWLEGGED BABOON ??“ YOU TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK IT WAS.???

? 

???I JUST DID, TWICE.?  BUT YOU??™RE TOO HARD HEADED TO LISTEN.?  DO YOU KNOW THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A BULL AND A STEER??  LOOK AT WHAT??™S HANGING DOWN BETWEEN THAT LONGHORNS REAR LEGS.???

? 

KATHY WRITES:

? 

???Don??™t ask me stupid questions like that, sure I do.????  With that, Kathy stuck her fingers in her mouth and let out a whistle loud enough to be heard on the other side of Fair Park.?  ???Hey, guys!?  Slow down ??“ I want to see that animal.???

? 

Everyone had slowed down; in fact, everyone was frozen in place after that wolf whistle.?  However, chickens were going berserk in their pens and feathers were flying; baby pigs were squealing at such a high pitch? people were holding their hands over their ears.?  Then the baby goats joined in crying to beat the band, and the? two fellows with? ???the bull???? were fighting to hold onto the ropes.?  If he got loose, someone would surely be killed.

? 

Kathy sprinted up to them, bent over, took a peek, and shook her head.?  ???Good grief, Loren, how could I have missed THAT??  Whoa ??“ I??™d hate to be a heifer stuck in a pasture with him!???

? 

Suddenly two Texas Rangers grabbed each of them and began escorting them out of the barn.?  Loren went calmly, but Kathy did her best to shake her arm free.

? 

???Get your cotton-pickin??™ hands off of me!??? she shouted with her eyes flashing.

? 

The larger of the Rangers stepped in front of her.?  ???Lady, you??™re going to get someone killed in that livestock barn.?  Now get out of here before we haul you in for disturbing the peace.???

? 

???Oh, I??™ll disturb your peace!?  All I want to do is go back long enough to see the baby goats.?  Whatcha think?????  Kathy was smiling at him and batting her eyelashes like a frog in a hailstorm.

? 

Loren??™s face had turned purple, but it was hard to tell if it was from anger, or if he was embarrassed to be associated with Kathy.?  ???May I speak for a moment??  I just want you to know I??™m really not with this woman.?  I??™m on my way to the Women??™s Building to start making my pie.?  The judging is this afternoon, and I??™ve got to get started on my Surprise Pie.???

? 

LOREN WRITES:

? 

AT THAT MOMENT, THE LAW OFFICERS RADIO SQUAWKED; THEY HAD A CALL TO GO TO THE MIDWAY WHERE SHOTS HAD BEEN FIRED.?  THEY RAN, LEAVING KATHY AND LOREN STANDING OUTSIDE THE LIVESTOCK BARN.

? 

???OH GOODY!?  LOREN, LET??™S GO BACK IN SO I CAN SEE THE BABY GOATS.???

? 

???ONLY IF YOU WILL PROMISE NO MORE WHISTLING, KATHY.???

? 

SO THEY WALKED BACK INTO THE BARN.?  BUT BEFORE THEY GOT TO THE GOATS, THEY SAW A SMALL CROWD STANDING IN FRONT OF ONE OF THE PIG PENS.?  LOREN AND KATHY STOPPED AT THE EDGE OF THE GROUP WHERE THEY COULD SEE INTO THE PEN.?  THERE WAS A BIG SOW LYING ON HER SIDE AND EIGHT LITTLE PIGS WERE GETTING THEIR DINNER.

? 

THERE WAS A LITTLE GIRL OF ABOUT FIVE YEARS STANDING ON THE BOTTOM BAR OF THE GATE SO SHE COULD SEE OVER THE TOP BAR.?  SHE HAD HER ARMS LYING ON THE TOP BAR AND HER CHIN RESTING ON HER ARMS.?  HER MOTHER WAS STANDING RIGHT BEHIND HER TO MAKE SURE SHE DIDN??™T FALL.

? 

AFTER THE LITTLE GIRL WATCHED THE SOW AND THE LITTLE PIGS GETTING THEIR DINNER FOR A WHILE, SHE TURNED TO HER MOTHER AND SAID, ???UMP, I BET THAT HURTS.???

? 

EVERYONE BROKE OUT IN LAUGHTER.?  THE LITTLE GIRL??™S MOTHER GRABBED HER BY THE ARM AND DRUG HER ON DOWN THE AISLE.

? 

KATHY WRITES:

? 

Kathy glanced at her watch and decided they would have to see the goats later in the day.?  If Loren didn??™t get to the Women??™s Building, he would never have his pie finished for the judging.?  ???Loren, do you still have your cooler of ingredients with you??  We??™ve got to get a move on so you can start cooking!???

? 

Loren??™s eyes glazed over and he took off on a dead run.?  When Kathy caught up with him, he had located his cooler right where the officers had nabbed them.?  It had been kicked off to the side of the aisle, but everything was still inside.? 

? 

They headed for the Women??™s Building, stopping just long enough for plate of nachos and cup of beer.?  Rubbing his tummy, Loren stood up.?  ???Ok, let??™ get this show on the road.?  I??™m ready to do some cooking!???

? 

Within minutes Loren was beginning his Surprise Pie under the watchful eye of those in charge.?  Cooks were everywhere and it smelled like heaven as things bubbled and baked.

? 

LOREN WRITES:

? 

WHILE LOREN WAS WORKING ON HIS SURPRISE PIE, KATHY WENT TO ANOTHER ROOM IN THE WOMAN??™S BUILDING TO SEE HOW HER CROSS-STITCH PROJECT HAD DONE IN THE JUDGING.?  SHE SHOUTED WITH DELIGHT WHEN SHE SAW A FIRST PLACE BLUE RIBBON HANGING ON HER CROSS-STITCH.

? 

WHEN LOREN FINISHED MAKING HIS PIE, HE WAS REQUIRED TO FILL OUT A CARD THAT WOULD STAY WITH HIS PIE AS LONG AS IT WAS ON DISPLAY.?  ON THE FRONT OF THE CARD HE WROTE:

? 

AVOCADO, FIG, PERSIMMON SURPRISE

BY, LOREN MOORE

FROM: ARLINGTON, TEXAS

? 

ON THE BACK OF THE CARD HE HAD TO WRITE OUT THE RECIPE FOR THE PIE.?  HE DID THIS, ENDING WITH: TAKE TWO-DOZEN GRAHAM CRACKERS, CRUSH THEM INTO VERY SMALL PIECES, AND SPRINKLE THE PIECES OVER THE TOP OF THE PIE.?  THEN MAKE AN ORANGE GLAZE AND POUR THAT OVER THE PIE TO GIVE IT A GOLDEN HUE.

? 

WHAT LOREN DIDN??™T WRITE IN THE RECIPE WAS THAT HE HAD SLIPPED SOME OF HIS ??¦ AH ??¦ SECRET INGREDIENT INTO THE PIE.?  HE HAD CARRIED IT IN A SMALL GLASS TUBE IN HIS JEANS POCKET, AND WHEN HE WAS SURE NO ONE WAS LOOKING, HE HAD POURED IT IN THE BLENDER WITH THE AVOCADO, FIG, AND PERSIMMON MEAT.

? 

WHEN LOREN??™S PIE AND CARD WERE READY, THEY WERE SET OUT ON A TABLE FOR THE JUDGES TO DO THEIR THING.?  WHILE HE WAS WAITING FOR THE JUDGES HE WENT LOOKING FOR KATHY.

? 

KATHY WRITES:

? 

There was a terrible commotion going on in the part of the building that displayed arts and crafts, so Loren headed that direction.?  If there was some excitement going on, he didn??™t want to miss out for one minute.

As he got closer he could only shake his head; he knew he heard a familiar voice in the midst of the ruckus.

? 

He finally pushed his way through the crowd, only to find Kathy once again in a stand off with the same Texas Rangers that had been in the livestock barn.

? 

???Excuse me sir, what??™s the problem here???? asked Loren.?  Down deep he swore to himself he would never again go anywhere with this woman.

? 

The larger of the two Rangers looked him over from head to toe.?  ???This little lady just got caught smuggling a baby goat into this building.?  It??™s inside that giant tote bag she calls her purse.???

? 

Again the Rangers tried to pry the bag away from her, but she was holding on for dear life.? 

? 

???Loren, I wasn??™t smuggling or stealing anything.?  While I was waiting for you I went back to see the babies.?  The mama goat was shunning this one and wouldn??™t let it eat.?  It kept crying and crying and I couldn??™t stand it.?  I was only going to cuddle it for a while and buy a carton of milk; its tummy is growling something terrible.???

? 

After hearing Kathy??™s explanation the crowd began getting upset.?  Suddenly they were chanting, ???Let her go, let her go, let her go.????  Shortly, people were tossing pint containers of milk her way for the baby goat.? 

? 

LOREN WRITES:

? 

ONE OF THE RANGERS TOLD KATHY SHE HAD TWO CHOICES.?  SHE COULD EITHER GIVE UP THE GOAT, OR GO TO JAIL.?  THE CHOICE WAS HERS.?  ???LOREN, I WAS JUST TRYING TO FEED THE POOR LITTLE THING,??? KATHY EXPLAINED AFTER SHE GAVE THE BABY GOAT TO THE RANGERS.

? 

???WELL I??™VE HEARD OF CATTLE RUSTLING BUT THAT??™S THE FIRST TIME I??™VE HEARD OF GOAT RUSTLING,??? LOREN SAID AS HE CHUCKLED.?  ???COME ON KATHY LETS GO SEE IF THE JUDGES HAVE FINISHED JUDGING THE PIES YET.???

? 

AS LOREN AND KATHY WALKED INTO THE ROOM WITH THE PIES, THERE WAS A BIG MOB OF PEOPLE STANDING IN FRONT OF THE TABLES WHERE THE PIES WERE ON DISPLAY.?  THEY PUSHED THEIR WAY THROUGH THE CROWD IN FRONT OF THE MIDDLE TABLE.?  LOREN KNEW THAT WAS WHERE THE FIRST PLACE PIE WOULD BE ON EXHIBIT.

? 

???HEY, THAT??™S NOT MY PIE!????  LOREN SHOUTED AS HE LOOKED AT A PIE SETTING THERE WITH THE FIRST PLACE BLUE RIBBON NEXT TO IT.?  JUST TO THE RIGHT OF THAT PIE WAS ANOTHER PIE WITH A RED SECOND PLACE RIBBON NEXT TO IT.?  ???THAT??™S MY PIE, KATHY,??? SAID LOREN AS HE POINTED TO THE SECOND PLACE PIE.

? 

LOREN SNATCHED UP THE WHITE CARD NEXT TO THE FIRST PLACE PIE AND READ ???HAWAIIAN SUN SET, BY BOB GEOHAGAN, FROM WACO, TEXAS.????  LOREN TURNED THE CARD OVER SO HE COULD READ THE RECIPE.?  WITH KATHY STANDING AT HIS ELBOW SO SHE COULD SEE, THEY READ THE RECIPE FOR THE FIRST PLACE PIE.

? 

INGREDIENTS: PECANS, PINEAPPLES, PAPAYAS, AND MANGOS.

? 

THE RECIPE WENT ON TO TELL ABOUT PUTTING ALL THESE INGREDIENTS IN A BLENDER AND MAKING A PASTE OUT OF THEM.?  AFTER THE PIE WAS BAKED, FRESH PECAN HALVES WERE PLACED ON TOP, AND THEN A PINEAPPLE GLAZE WAS POURED ON TOP OF THAT.

? 

???KATHY, WHO IS THIS GEOHAGAH, ANYWAY??  HE??™S NEVER ENTERED A PIE IN THE CONTEST BEFORE.?  I HOPE THE JUDGES GET THE ???GREEN APPLE SQUIRTS??™ FROM TASTING HIS PIE.???

? 

???BUT LOREN, THERE WERE NO APPLES IN HIS PIE.???

? 

THE END

? 

? 

? 

?© COPYRIGHT 2005

?