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Storytime Tapestry Newsletter

The newsletter devoted to spreading love and cultural awareness around the world.

April 6, 2006

My apologies to all my readers and to David Wainland and B.J. Cassady; I accidently accredited this story, My Vacation, 2003 to David Wainland when in fact it belonged to B.J. Cassady. To make matters worst, I sent out a double story for B.J. under different names,

B.J's submissions are here included one more time so that you can actually see what he wrote.

I think I need a vacation so many mistakes!

My Vacation 2003

B.J. Cassady

What started innocently enough turned out to be quite a story.

This year I took my first vacation overseas. I traveled through Wales,

then Scotland and wound up fishing in Loch Ness. The time was about

2 am, when something quite large bit on my line. As I tried to reel the fish

in, my whole boat started to be pulled towards the deeper part of the lake.

The next events happened in a flurry. The full moon was reflected off

the Loch's water when I beheld a creature with a serpent's neck with

a rippled back. It must have been sixty feet long, at least the part of it

I could see. The next event was my line snapped and the creature dove

beneath the water as if frightened by something. Suddenly, it became totally

dark, the moon was obscured by a large floating cloud... but no, the cloud

shifted directions. The cloud was a UFO! A beam of light emitted from the

craft towards me and the next thing I remember was waking up in a forest.

Small bruises were on my body and in my right hand I held a medallion

with unknown writings. The Medallion was pulsing, like a heart beat.

I heard the leaves in the forest being crushed. An animal was coming my

way. I saw a huge hairy object about nine feet tall come into the clearing

walking towards me. Bigfoot. It picked me up like a sack of potatoes and

started running through the woods. The creature had a horrible aroma. I

noticed it had a medallion around it's neck like mine. What is going on? Am

I still in Scotland?

After what seemed hours he carried me into a clearing and deposited me

there. I waited to see what would happen next. The whoop whoop sounds

started and came closer. Two black helicopters landed not fifteen feet away.

Three men wearing black outfits jumped out of the helicopter and gave the

Bigfoot a package. Bigfoot turned and disappeared into the woods. I was

nervous, sweat was breaking out on my brow. I asked, "Where am I?", but

received an answer in a language I had never heard before. The men in

black escorted me into the helicopters and they immediately lifted off.

I must have fallen asleep and therefore I lost track of time. The choppers

were landing on an airfield. I recognized it as area 51. The men roughly

pushed me out of the helicopter and we were met by an odd group of people.

One appeared to be a doctor or scientist, another a military man, a third

obviously was a civilian. The last individual sparked my curiosity. He

stood about four feet tall, had a large head with large black eyes. He said

nothing out loud, but he communicated with me in my head.

They led me down through a maze of tunnels and buildings. How far

were we underground, I do not know. Finally we arrived at our destination.

A hanger with four or five UFO craft were there. The alien pointed to one

and mentioned mentally, "Fix the device.".

They led me into the craft. On the outside the craft appeared to be about

twenty feet across but inside it appeared differently, maybe the length of a

football field. I was ushered to the console where the alien pointed to the

screen and again he projected the thought "Fix it".

I looked at the screen and saw the problem. I turned and told them, this

is windows 2000, it crashes all the time. I rebooted it and the screen came

up fine. I detected a mental image of me being tossed out of a helicopter

at 5,000 feet when the medallion started pulsing fast against my chest. I put

my hand on it and zap... the next thing I knew I woke up in my fishing boat

still holding the quart of scotch, nearly gone. I would show you the

medallion but it was gone, the fishhook was gone, but I was alive.

U. B Snowed

Scotland

aka BJ Cassady

Guthrie, Oklahoma

~**~**~

Where is the evidence?"

B.J. Cassady

"Where is the evidence?" most people ask me when I explain

that the UFOs have taken me on trips to Venus, Mars and beyond.

Last night I finally received positive evidence of alien existence.

They left me a letter in my mail box. I opened the letter(it was postmarked

Venus) and read it. They thanked me for my assistance with their

popcorn popper(an alternate fuel and time machine). The letter was

even signed by the head alien, Dr P Owed, former resident of Mars.

He was the one who made the monkey face on Mars.

I took my letter and envelope to the local newspaper the Hiatt

County Semi-Monthly Times and showed the editor my hard evidence.

He didn't want to look at my hard evidence and called me a pervert.

Well the police said the letter was blank. I tried to explain you had to

have the implants to read the letter, but they didn't understand.

So fellow Ufonaughts I beg you to gather your finances and bail

me out of the Hiatt county jail. Please mail your money to:

I. B. Loco

Hiatt County Jail,

North Dakota

BJ Cassady

Guthrie, Okla

bj.cassady@af-group.com

~**~**~

The Day I Met a Semi-famous Person

(This event took place about 1981)

B. J. Cassady

My favorite place to eat in Oklahoma City was the Patio Restaurant.

One evening when I was between marriages, I happened to be there

eating at about 2am. Sitting at a table next to me who looked like

John Belushi, he also looked like a dog had dragged him through a

trash heap. Maybe it was the time of night or the fact nobody else

was in this diner, but I asked him if anyone else has mentioned he

looked like John Belushi?

"Only my mother, father and Jim, my brother." he replied

It was John Belushi! He was alone and he pointed at the chair next

to him ushering me over. He flashed out a fifty dollar bill gave it to the

waitress and asked me if I knew of a place where he could be alone

for a bit. John mentioned he had a bodyguard that was hired by

Columbia Pictures but he had lost him before he grabbed a cab. John

mentioned he did not know Oklahoma City and did not have a car.

I told him to get in my car, it was a 1972 Toronado, I was about out

of gas but had enough to get to my apartment. If he wanted to rest, he

could do so at my apartment. John said that was fine with him and he

peeled of another fifty dollar bill and pushed it towards me and said,

"It's for gas."

I zipped over to my place and we went in. He sunrise me. John

started snorting cocaine. It was the first time in my life I had ever seen

the stuff. He had a flask of whiskey and chugged it down fairly fast.

I passed on his drugs and booze. He ate a lot of food in my fridge. He

cranked up my stereo and we visited.

"I am a lonely person, BJ." he said. "I cannot go anywhere because

people recognize me and swarm over me. People want a piece of me.

My life is not mine anymore." he continued. "But I like the money, and

I like the fame and the things I can get with money."

He mentioned he had a movie to do "Continental Divide" in Colorado, but

he had skipped out because of the pressure. He did not like the movie, but

took the money for it. I talked to him about the abuse of drugs and how

it can influence a person's life, but he did not want to listen to it. He

seemed to me, to have a death wish.

"Go to Colorado with me." John begged. "I will find a role for you in

the movie. You could be a preacher or something. I could get you more

money in two weeks than you could make in a year here. Heck you could

double for me in some shots."

John showed me how to angle his eyebrows that is his characteristic.

I asked him if he believed in God, etc. He mentioned he believed in being

happy, but the more he got, the worse he felt.

By this time it was 5am and he said he had to catch his personal jet at 8am

and would I give him a ride to the airport. He tossed a hundred dollar bill at

me. I tossed it back. He told me to take it else he would punch me. What the

heck, I took it. At the airport, he got out and gave me a hug and said he

wished he could trade places with me. I asked, "Why?"

He said when he had nothing he had everything, and now that he had

everything, he had nothing, no true friends except Dan Aykroid. He wished

me well in my life. Asked me one more time to go to Colorado with him.

I gave him my phone number and told him to call me if he needed a friend.

I told him I did not need that kind of job with that kind of temptation.

"You are smart BJ. The business can destroy a person." he spoke.

He signed an autograph, signed one of my Lampoon records, gave me his

card and personal phone number and said to call him. Well as life would

have it, a year later he was dead. I can still do that eyebrow thing. Still have

his card, autograph and still have his hundred dollar bill....and most

important of all, my health. No regrets, he is dead and I am alive.

BJ Cassady

Guthrie, Okla

bj.cassady@af-group.com

PS. this was a practical joke I pulled on a co-worker. Never met the guy.

I took a autographed(fake) record with his name on it. The co-worker fell

for the story hook, line and sinker. I hope one of you did to. : > )

B.J. Cassady

BJ.Cassady @ af-group.com

B.J. Cassady is a Stephen Minister at Edmond Trinity Church and ISD professional

in Guthrie, Oklahoma. A disabled Vietnam era USAF vet, BJ enjoys giving back to

the world with his writings and is putting together a CD audio collection of his best

writings. For further information please write: bj.enterprises @juno.com

Also look for his story 'Medals' in "More Patriot Hearts" by Lt Col William

Coffey and "The Quilt".